MSE Parents Club Part 11

SugarSpun

jillie1974 wrote: »

something's bothering me a little so....

anyone who had a c-section, did you get to hold baby straight away??

No

They showed her to me and kind of put her near my face, but both my arms were filled with tubes. Then they made me drink chamomile tea before I was allowed to see her.

jillie1974

My_Fathers_Daughter wrote: »

I was thinking (and wasn't going to write but hey ho ) that I wouldn't mind hubby holding Benjamin before me (although would rather not!) but I my parents and PIL would pee me off

Perhaps, if you are feeling nice, worth suggesting to the ladies on the preg thread that they might want to consider putting something in their birth plans?

Please take my next bit with the hug that is intended to go with it:
Ultimately, you can't change it so you have to deal with it and move on. K will never need to know who held him first (and wouldn't even care if he did). YOU are his mummy, his only mummy and nothing can change that bond that the two of you have. You will be getting all the best cuddles for all of his childhood - so meh to the first 40 minutes. xxx


Hope all of that hasn't upset you.

not upset at all . think i just need to stop looking back and start looking forwards.
thank you for your kind and wise words x

tarajayne wrote: »

Ditto, xxx, and techincally, you have wonderfully cradled your baby for 9mths which is something no-one else could have done for you. :A

thanks tara

jillie1974

workinmummy wrote: »

This is how i feel. Not holding either of them first has never bothered me, because OH did it. But I can see how it would and could effect others. But by god if MIL had held either of them before me I would have alternated between flaming red rage and bright green jealousy. Which is also a reason why I point blank refused to have either sets of parents there at all. Could not have hacked that. The fact that Alex was early and came whilst IL's had booggered off on holiday to Spain, gave me great satisfaction.:D (Biatch moi?)

if what happened hadnt, it would have been me, DH and my mum.

boogellyboo

Jillie following on from what MFD said, I saw the huge beamy grins Kian had just for his mummy yesterday. Just gorgeous x

searching_me

tarajayne wrote: »

Friend has gone Docs with her OH, as he's still feeling lethargic etc etc.... has been too poorly for work.

oooooh sympathy .. hope they're well behaved x

tarajayne

searching_me wrote: »

oooooh sympathy .. hope they're well behaved x

Sympathy for what?

jillie1974

boogellyboo wrote: »

Jillie following on from what MFD said, I saw the huge beamy grins Kian had just for his mummy yesterday. Just gorgeous x

thank you for that

workinmummy

jillie1974 wrote: »

if what happened hadnt, it would have been me, DH and my mum.

I just wanted OH and myself at both. Don' t really think my mum would have wanted to be there, would have panicked too much. But each to their own, I say. I felt that the birth of our children was a private thing for just us. But then I suppose OH could have done with someone there to support him too, especially during the wait to prep me for surgery. Ooh now I'm feeling slightly selfish. Especially as OH's parent were away for Alex's birth. And I don't want to feel sorry for him, because I'm still not talking to him .:cool:

newbie_maz

workinmummy wrote: »

This is how i feel. Not holding either of them first has never bothered me, because OH did it. But I can see how it would and could effect others. But by god if MIL had held either of them before me I would have alternated between flaming red rage and bright green jealousy. Which is also a reason why I point blank refused to have either sets of parents there at all. Could not have hacked that. The fact that Alex was early and came whilst IL's had booggered off on holiday to Spain, gave me great satisfaction.:D (Biatch moi?)

I so agree with this! I love my parents but wouldn't have wanted them there, nevermind in-laws. Luckily they all live about 120 miles away (thank god for moving away to uni!) and i refused to say i was having contractions christmas morning so they didn't know a thing until i was already in hospital. They were still here 2 days later tho despite the snow :rotfl:

tarajayne

I was there, DD asked me to stay!