MSE Parents Club Part 11

searching_me

tbh jillie id rather it go in one go as i cant afford to be down for ages while its paid back x

Mazcabs

jillie1974 wrote: »

something's bothering me a little so....

anyone who had a c-section, did you get to hold baby straight away??

when K was born they showed me him and then took him away. i didnt get to hold him for bout 40mins while they 'fixed' me up so DH, PIL and my mum all had held him before me. there was no mention in notes of any problem.... just plays on my mind a little as all the mums on OBEM who had c/s have held baby straight away. prob me being daft

Dont worry Jillie I have the same feeling of jealously/ disappointment... I never got to hold either of mine straight away...

Henry was c/s and they just showed me him and then took him away to clean etc then my sister held him first as both my arms had tubes in them...I was then in the theatre for another 2 hours on my own due to a lost needle (never found) and so my sister, mum and OH got to hold him before me.

With William (natural birth) He was shown to me again and then whipped to get cleaned/dressed/ checked over and then they were sewing me up so my mum held him first again...

jillie1974

My_Fathers_Daughter wrote: »

Jillie - I really don't know what to say but didn't want to not say anything IYSWIM.

It must be strange, because we all want to be the first to hold our babies, and it is not at all daft. Maybe they were looking after you first?

Does it only bother you when you watch something like OBEM or do you think about it more often? xxx

thanks MFD, i assumed it was so they could look after me and yes when i watch OBEM and see mums holding babies straight away it does make me think, oh i never got that. and then my brain goes into overdrive. but i'm positive if there had been any problem i would have been told. DH says nothing was mentioned to him so i'm sure i;m being a bit daft. i find it a bit upsetting that they (PIL) got to hold him before i did. although after what had happened i know it meant a lot to them that they were there (albeit in the waiting room) when he was born.

does that make sense...?
i;m sure its just 'the way its done' and i was so tired at that stage i may have missed them saying things. i know of course that he was taken to be cleaned, weighed, agpar etc and they did put him beside me to see him, i just didnt get that cuddle before everyone else did. DH was the first to hold him. (dont mind that bit)

but one thing for certain..... next time it will be said that i want to hold baby first. and someone has already said that i can go and ask to see all the notes if i really want to.

tarajayne

Ok, I have an 11wk old, a 8mth old, 6yr old, 8yr old and 10yr old, helpppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!

My_Fathers_Daughter

jillie1974 wrote: »

thanks MFD, i assumed it was so they could look after me and yes when i watch OBEM and see mums holding babies straight away it does make me think, oh i never got that. and then my brain goes into overdrive. but i'm positive if there had been any problem i would have been told. DH says nothing was mentioned to him so i'm sure i;m being a bit daft. i find it a bit upsetting that they (PIL) got to hold him before i did. although after what had happened i know it meant a lot to them that they were there (albeit in the waiting room) when he was born.

does that make sense...?
i;m sure its just 'the way its done' and i was so tired at that stage i may have missed them saying things. i know of course that he was taken to be cleaned, weighed, agpar etc and they did put him beside me to see him, i just didnt get that cuddle before everyone else did. DH was the first to hold him. (dont mind that bit)

but one thing for certain..... next time it will be said that i want to hold baby first. and someone has already said that i can go and ask to see all the notes if i really want to.

I was thinking (and wasn't going to write but hey ho ) that I wouldn't mind hubby holding Benjamin before me (although would rather not!) but I my parents and PIL would pee me off

Perhaps, if you are feeling nice, worth suggesting to the ladies on the preg thread that they might want to consider putting something in their birth plans?

Please take my next bit with the hug that is intended to go with it:
Ultimately, you can't change it so you have to deal with it and move on. K will never need to know who held him first (and wouldn't even care if he did). YOU are his mummy, his only mummy and nothing can change that bond that the two of you have. You will be getting all the best cuddles for all of his childhood - so meh to the first 40 minutes. xxx


Hope all of that hasn't upset you.

tarajayne

My_Fathers_Daughter wrote: »

Please take my next bit with the hug that is intended to go with it:
Ultimately, you can't change it so you have to deal with it and move on. K will never need to know who held him first (and wouldn't even care if he did). YOU are his mummy, his only mummy and nothing can change that bond that the two of you have. You will be getting all the best cuddles for all of his childhood - so meh to the first 40 minutes. xxx


Hope all of that hasn't upset you.

Ditto, xxx, and techincally, you have wonderfully cradled your baby for 9mths which is something no-one else could have done for you. :A

searching_me

that was quick work tara :rotfl: whats going on? x

Krystaltips

nikkit72 wrote: »

concerning the cine world tickets , you didnt have to click a certain city from the drop down menu as the voucher they send you is valid at ANY cineworld , the drop down menu is just where the mycity newsletter comes from.

Damnit!!! They've all sold out now

tarajayne

searching_me wrote: »

that was quick work tara :rotfl: whats going on? x

Friend has gone Docs with her OH, as he's still feeling lethargic etc etc.... has been too poorly for work.

workinmummy

My_Fathers_Daughter wrote: »

I was thinking (and wasn't going to write but hey ho ) that I wouldn't mind hubby holding Benjamin before me (although would rather not!) but I my parents and PIL would pee me off

.

This is how i feel. Not holding either of them first has never bothered me, because OH did it. But I can see how it would and could effect others. But by god if MIL had held either of them before me I would have alternated between flaming red rage and bright green jealousy. Which is also a reason why I point blank refused to have either sets of parents there at all. Could not have hacked that. The fact that Alex was early and came whilst IL's had booggered off on holiday to Spain, gave me great satisfaction.:D (Biatch moi?)