Great 'Best Cold Caller Rebukes' Hunt

horse54101

If my husband answers he usually says the homeowner is in prison!!!
I just tell them to hang on and either leave the phone on the side or shut the front door to kep the heat in!
I think we're blacklisted by cold callers as we haven't had one lately!!!

BexInLondon

money?whatmoney? wrote: »

Three possibilities - If they start with "I'm sorry to bother you..." reply "No problem, goodbye!" Or, "Oh, that's exactly the job/service my husband/wife is employed in" (always works for me) or "I would LOVE to talk to you about blah, blah, blah, but can you just wait until I get the cat out of the tumble dryer? He should be dry now." They usually hang up...

When I was 5 I put our rescue cat in the tumble dryer and switched it on. He managed about 5 spins before mum ran in and turned it off. He never liked me after that.

whatfaff

I got one as I was just about to eat my tea yesterday and thoroughly enjoyed myself getting rid. I don't like being nasty or rude as I suppose everyone has to earn a liviing somehow, but I am on the telephone preference service so shouldn't receive cold calls. Despite me informing the telesales person of this I was informed that it was apparently 'not sales but research' so they did not consider that the telephone preference service rules applied. I always get asked for 'Mrs' when I'm a 'Miss' so most of the time say that there is no 'Mrs' at this address. When neither of these tactics put off my particularly persistent caller, and despite me saying I was about to eat she insisted on continuing, saying it would only take 'a minute' of my time, I started the clock, interrupted her at 30 seconds to tell her that she'd had half the time and still not got anywhere, and at 60 seconds said that she'd had all the time she'd requested, I hoped it had been of assistance and I was hanging up now to eat my tea - bye!

Badger717

I ask them for their home number, so I can naff them off by ringing them up when they've finnished work. They don't like that.

Debran

Lugh_Chronain wrote: »

Register with SilentCallGard. This was kindly given to me by a BT operative when enquiring with BT about silent calls some time ago.

If you have any difficulty registering here, you can register by calling 0800 083 1113.

Rang 0800 083 1113 as suggested.

"Sorry, the number you have dialled is not in service. Please check the number and try again."

russetred

I tell them I am experiencing a high influx of calls at the moment and whilst their call is important to me I have placed them in a queue.I then sing Vivaldi's spring to them...badly.

cpisbell

I just tell the caller, politely, that any future calls will be subject to a £100 service charge and that calling this number again will be taken as acceptance of this condition.

brewerdave

russetred, thats a cracker - I'll think I'll record that on the lttle pocket dictaphone I have , leave it by the phone and just play it for the foreign call centres ....He he

[Deleted User]

This link give translations of *useful* Hindi phrases - as my husband is from south Asia I can do a passable accent - BUT!! use with care, this link does have some *very creative* phrases and you might be offended.

I sometimes use a choice phrase when I get an unsolicited international telemarketing call (I don't get UK calls as TPS seems to have worked) Just ask if the caller speaks Hindi...

http://www.masalatalk.com/masalaboard/showthread.php?t=167200

mr-qtj

The reply:- "I charge £50 for a 10 minute interview or part thereof, plus £50 for each succeeding 5 minutes or part thereof. How do you wish to pay?" completely throws 99% of the nuisances. For the odd stubborn 1%, a reminder that I am registered with the telephone, mail, and e-mail preference services and that what they are doing is illegal together with the request for their personal details and those of the company they are ringing on behalf of, always works. I've never got to the end of this spiel yet without them rudely (???) putting the phone down on me.<VBG>