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Great 'Best Cold Caller Rebukes' Hunt

Former_MSE_Penelope
Posts: 536 Forumite
The phone rings, you pick it up and UGH, it's a cold calling telemarketer trying to flog you a new mobile, camera, subscription or even wipe your debts. Even if you put the phone down they'll try again. Of course signing up to the telephone preference service helps stop the legal callers (see stop junk calls guide), but calls can still come - what are your top tips for getting rid of 'em?
Please don't include any abusive or dangerous suggestions in this thread. This is not what the hunt is for and we do not condone these ideas. If you would like to report any particular posts please let our abuse team know by pressing the red ! button at the bottom of the relevant post.
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Please don't include any abusive or dangerous suggestions in this thread. This is not what the hunt is for and we do not condone these ideas. If you would like to report any particular posts please let our abuse team know by pressing the red ! button at the bottom of the relevant post.
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Assuming its a female I have started flirting with them to see how far they will go, usually they ring off because its not in their script - and good free practise for me LoLLL
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I use the Anti Telemarketing counter script.
It can be found here
http://www.xs4all.nl/~egbg/counterscript.html0 -
If its for any type of home improvement I simply say "do you know this is a council house?" The phone goes dead within a second.
Or if it's one of those calls where you are connected after you answer I just put the phone down-they are paying the bill but I'm not listening0 -
Ask where they got your number. Tell them you're ex-directory and registered with the Telephone Preference Service and ask them to remove your number from their database. Then when they ring again, which they will, tell them to Pee off (or words to that effect) and get nasty!0
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make-do=and-mend wrote: »Ask where they got your number. Tell them you're ex-directory and registered with the Telephone Preference Service and ask them to remove your number from their database. Then when they ring again, which they will, tell them to Pee off (or words to that effect) and get nasty!
Additionally, inform them that they are breaking the law by calling you as a registered TPS member. Demand the company's contact details and tell them you are going to report them to OFCOM, and they should expect a hefty fine. I find this normally stops them dead in their tracks. Have to say though, I rarely receive cold calls now I'm TPS registered. It's very effective.0 -
say nothing --- and just listen . It drives them crazy. and then they hang up. No more calls from them
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When a cold caller asks if they can ask me some questions I always answer politely ... 'yes' - they then get in to their spiel ..... when a reply is required I say nothing. This really confuses them and they prompt me for an answer - to which I reply 'I said you could ask me some questions ... I never said that I'd answer them!'
This usually has the desired effect!
Another caller was trying to sell me a conservatory - I played along and let them think I was interested - organizing for someone to come and do a survey and quote. When the woman asked for the address I made one up - a first floor flat!:rotfl:0 -
If I'm in a bad mood, such callers simply get a suggestion to go forth and procreate in another location, at very high volume. Manners doesn't come into it - their call is unsolicited.
If I'm in a more mellow mood, I let them talk for a few seconds, then say "Please excuse me - there's someone at the door - I'll be right back!" Then I lay down the phone and leave it... forever...0 -
I’m registered with the Telephone Preference Service and I usually tell them they can be fined for calling me. That usually does the trick fairly quickly – until they call back again later!
However, if I’m not doing much at the time, I like to have a bit of fun with them, especially if it’s one of those “we just want to ask you some questions for a survey” calls.
“Of course I’ll speak to you, I just need your credit card details first.”
“Why?”
“Well, I’m self employed and I charge for my time. So, if you want to talk to me, you will have to pay me.”
They usually hang up mystified at this point, but I did have one Scotsman who said that I wasn’t being very charitable!
I asked him if he was being paid to call me.
“Yes”
“Well I want paying too. After all, without me you won’t get paid.”
And so on, until they disappear…
Or, if it’s the evening and I’m watching TV and get a sales call, I tell them I’m really interested in what they are selling and am glad they called. But, I’ve got a pan on the cooker, so just let me turn it down first.
Then I put the phone next to the TV and carry on watching.
It’s fun guessing how long it will be before they hang up!
Have fun!
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I used to engage in conversation for a short time, and then I'd say " ooh - just a moment, hang on please..." as though something had happened, and leave them waiting forever. Then a friend gave me a phone she'd bought and didn't like, and to my joy i discovered that it has a HOLD feature that plays a dreadful tacky electronic tune over and over again, so they can listen to that whilst they wait for you!0
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