Great 'Best Cold Caller Rebukes' Hunt

Former_MSE_Penelope
Former_MSE_Penelope Posts: 536 Forumite
edited 5 March 2010 at 5:00PM in Phones & TV
The phone rings, you pick it up and UGH, it's a cold calling telemarketer trying to flog you a new mobile, camera, subscription or even wipe your debts. Even if you put the phone down they'll try again. Of course signing up to the telephone preference service helps stop the legal callers (see stop junk calls guide), but calls can still come - what are your top tips for getting rid of 'em?


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Comments

  • arealhighlander
    arealhighlander Posts: 597
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post
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    edited 9 March 2010 at 8:28PM
    Assuming its a female I have started flirting with them to see how far they will go, usually they ring off because its not in their script - and good free practise for me LoLLL :)


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  • scotsbob
    scotsbob Posts: 4,632 Forumite
    I use the Anti Telemarketing counter script.
    It can be found here

    http://www.xs4all.nl/~egbg/counterscript.html
  • ms_piggy
    ms_piggy Posts: 42
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    If its for any type of home improvement I simply say "do you know this is a council house?" The phone goes dead within a second.

    Or if it's one of those calls where you are connected after you answer I just put the phone down-they are paying the bill but I'm not listening
  • Ask where they got your number. Tell them you're ex-directory and registered with the Telephone Preference Service and ask them to remove your number from their database. Then when they ring again, which they will, tell them to Pee off (or words to that effect) and get nasty!
  • andrewjf
    andrewjf Posts: 285
    First Post First Anniversary Combo Breaker
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    Ask where they got your number. Tell them you're ex-directory and registered with the Telephone Preference Service and ask them to remove your number from their database. Then when they ring again, which they will, tell them to Pee off (or words to that effect) and get nasty!

    Additionally, inform them that they are breaking the law by calling you as a registered TPS member. Demand the company's contact details and tell them you are going to report them to OFCOM, and they should expect a hefty fine. I find this normally stops them dead in their tracks. Have to say though, I rarely receive cold calls now I'm TPS registered. It's very effective.
  • mulli8au
    mulli8au Posts: 1 Newbie
    edited 9 March 2010 at 8:29PM
    say nothing --- and just listen . It drives them crazy. and then they hang up. No more calls from them

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  • Mrsmch349
    Mrsmch349 Posts: 33 Forumite
    When a cold caller asks if they can ask me some questions I always answer politely ... 'yes' - they then get in to their spiel ..... when a reply is required I say nothing. This really confuses them and they prompt me for an answer - to which I reply 'I said you could ask me some questions ... I never said that I'd answer them!'

    This usually has the desired effect!

    Another caller was trying to sell me a conservatory - I played along and let them think I was interested - organizing for someone to come and do a survey and quote. When the woman asked for the address I made one up - a first floor flat!:rotfl:
  • pixwix
    pixwix Posts: 122
    First Post First Anniversary Combo Breaker
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    If I'm in a bad mood, such callers simply get a suggestion to go forth and procreate in another location, at very high volume. Manners doesn't come into it - their call is unsolicited.

    If I'm in a more mellow mood, I let them talk for a few seconds, then say "Please excuse me - there's someone at the door - I'll be right back!" Then I lay down the phone and leave it... forever...
  • Theta_2
    Theta_2 Posts: 1 Newbie
    edited 9 March 2010 at 8:29PM
    I’m registered with the Telephone Preference Service and I usually tell them they can be fined for calling me. That usually does the trick fairly quickly – until they call back again later!

    However, if I’m not doing much at the time, I like to have a bit of fun with them, especially if it’s one of those “we just want to ask you some questions for a survey” calls.

    “Of course I’ll speak to you, I just need your credit card details first.”

    “Why?”

    “Well, I’m self employed and I charge for my time. So, if you want to talk to me, you will have to pay me.”

    They usually hang up mystified at this point, but I did have one Scotsman who said that I wasn’t being very charitable!

    I asked him if he was being paid to call me.

    “Yes”

    “Well I want paying too. After all, without me you won’t get paid.”

    And so on, until they disappear…

    Or, if it’s the evening and I’m watching TV and get a sales call, I tell them I’m really interested in what they are selling and am glad they called. But, I’ve got a pan on the cooker, so just let me turn it down first.

    Then I put the phone next to the TV and carry on watching.

    It’s fun guessing how long it will be before they hang up!

    Have fun!

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  • angeltoad
    angeltoad Posts: 43 Forumite
    I used to engage in conversation for a short time, and then I'd say " ooh - just a moment, hang on please..." as though something had happened, and leave them waiting forever. Then a friend gave me a phone she'd bought and didn't like, and to my joy i discovered that it has a HOLD feature that plays a dreadful tacky electronic tune over and over again, so they can listen to that whilst they wait for you!
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