'Settled down, engaged, married, kids... then what?' blog discussion

This is the discussion to link on the back of Martin's blog. Please read the blog first, as this discussion follows it.
Please click reply to discuss below.


  • JimmyTheWigJimmyTheWig Forumite
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    So I wanted to ask those further on in these life stages…. what are the next ones?
    For us, with the eldest of 4 kids being 6, it's "are you having any more?" or "when are you having another one?".

    Though not there yet, I would imagine the next phase would be that people give up asking about you and ask about the kids - "when is she going to move out?", "hasn't he got a girlfriend, yet?", etc.

    Then I guess it comes the time of "don't you think it's time you moved into a home?". :)
  • TigsteroonieTigsteroonie Forumite
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    People gave up asking me these questions when I started doing things in the wrong order, and then repeating a few of them!

    What's next?
    • When are you buying that second home (in the south of France)?
    • When are you buying your midlife crisis boat / motorbike / aston martin?
    • When are you planning on retiring? (early I hope!)
    :heartpuls Mrs Marleyboy :heartpuls

    MSE: many of the benefits of a helpful family, without disadvantages like having to compete for the tv remote

    :) Proud Parents to an Aut-some son :)
  • Tete_en_l'AirTete_en_l'Air Forumite
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    What's next?

    If you've found the person you love then surely everything you do is an adventure, life is so exciting!
    Weightloss: 14.5/65lb
  • SailorSamSailorSam Forumite
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    What's next?

    If you've found the person you love then surely everything you do is an adventure, life is so exciting!

    So now i know all i need for an exciting life is to find the person i love.
    Then why is that so hard.
    Liverpool is one of the wonders of Britain,
    What it may grow to in time, I know not what.

    Daniel Defoe: 1725.
  • I get 'are you thinking about having another' when they see me with my 2. I have two kids and the eldest just turned two and the youngest is 7 months. What on earth are they thinking!

    People should mind their own business. We were trying for a baby for years and were told we coudln't have them and we were having IVF but people still think they have the right to ask 'when are you going to have children' and we had to smile and say 'ooh not yet but one day'. People shouldn't say things like that as they do not know the circumstances.
  • Get chickens!
  • FinishrichFinishrich Forumite
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    Interesting blog, I had 6 years of people asking when we were going to have children. I'd had enough at one point and I remember one poor bloke at a family BBQ asking me the question and I told him I couldn't have any - A real conversation stopper, I bet he never asked anyone that question again!

    A year later we had a little boy - he's now 10 and just yesterday was asked who his girlfriend is?

    10 years on they've now stopped asking when I'm having another one.

    I'm guessing the focus shifts to children and when are they leaving home, getting a job, going to uni etc before it comes back to the parents again and when are they retiring.
  • ScarletBeaScarletBea Forumite
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    I know it may sound a bit rude, and I was never able to do it, but the trick when people ask these stupid questions is to ask one back, really obnoxious, to see if they get the point.

    I think I'll just start answering "I don't want to" to any of these questions.
    Being brave is going after your dreams head on
  • Percy1983Percy1983 Forumite
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    I am at the 'when are you getting married?' question.

    My answer is always the same, "when we don't like each other anymore".

    Gets a laugh and kills the question.
    Have my first business premises (+4th business) 01/11/2017
    Quit day job to run 3 businesses 08/02/2017
    Started third business 25/06/2016
    Son born 13/09/2015
    Started a second business 03/08/2013
    Officially the owner of my own business since 13/01/2012
  • kezbabybabekezbabybabe Forumite
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    When I was in my 7 year relationship the dreaded valentine's day would come around, some lucky person would get engaged and then the questions would start... "When are you getting engaged?"

    Yeah cos that's when I'm getting engaged, just cos someone else has...

    After the obvious 3 I'm not sure, but then again those closest to you would probably already know?
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