1st baby on the way and MIL's smoking

jellyhead

but we're not talking about being too clean or avoiding bugs or viruses - we're talking about smoke.

I doubt your assumption that all non smokers take their kids into town or to mcdonalds too. It's been months since my kids went into town, although we did allow youngest to eat mcdonalds tonight because the power cut meant my husband had to drag us all into his work for an hour as soon as he picked us up from the church group, and youngest needed to eat, mcdonalds is on the way, actually why am I justifying myself? I fed him processed fatty rubbish, it's a one-off, unlike smoking.

BigBlackcat

tandraig wrote: »

as I said before - I am a smoker and i take REASONABLE measures around my grandkids! then their parents take them into town etc! but some of the measures spoken about on here - the thirty minute rule - the quoting of spurious experiments - reminds me of the famous recluse Howard Hughes (and if you dont know who i mean look him up on internet).
Its OTT!!! You cannot keep kids in a virus free bug free zone......it isnt healthy for them! and it really annoys me that parents go schizoid over thirdhand smoke and then take the kids into town, feed them macdonalds, haribos etc all the while congratulating themselves they are great parents!!
So yeah I wound you up a bit - I survived parents who smoked around me - so did my OH! I didnt smoke around my kids, oh and shock horror - I taught them to make mud pies... and let them taste them!!! will remind you all that new research is coming out that the use of anti-bacs in the home is counter productive - kids dont develop immune systems if the home is TOO clean!!!

OP didn't mention wanting to keep her baby in a sterile environment.

She merely wanted to protect said infant from possibly toxic residue left on a smokers skin/clothing.

I totally agree with other posters, that while you cannot protect your children from EVERYTHING that is potentially harmful, you certainly do all you can to protect them in AVOIDABLE situations.

*Louise*

tandraig wrote: »

as I said before - I am a smoker and i take REASONABLE measures around my grandkids! then their parents take them into town etc! but some of the measures spoken about on here - the thirty minute rule - the quoting of spurious experiments - reminds me of the famous recluse Howard Hughes (and if you dont know who i mean look him up on internet).
Its OTT!!! You cannot keep kids in a virus free bug free zone......it isnt healthy for them! and it really annoys me that parents go schizoid over thirdhand smoke and then take the kids into town, feed them macdonalds, haribos etc all the while congratulating themselves they are great parents!!
So yeah I wound you up a bit - I survived parents who smoked around me - so did my OH! I didnt smoke around my kids, oh and shock horror - I taught them to make mud pies... and let them taste them!!! will remind you all that new research is coming out that the use of anti-bacs in the home is counter productive - kids dont develop immune systems if the home is TOO clean!!!

Fgs it's nothing to do with GERMS. I don't care if mine come into contact with germs, they need to build up resistance...it's good for them. Show me where being exposed to smoke can help build up an immunity and I (and probably every other mother) will stop worrying about it.

There is a BIG difference between germs and toxic smoke fumes. (and before you go on about car fumes, I live in the country)

You're getting all worked up about a completely different topic.

seven-day-weekend

babelfish wrote: »

I

She had a neighbour who kindly knitted me some cardigans when I was expecting and she also smoked like a chimney. Every cardigan I got from her had to be washed and hung outside for a good blow (washing on its own didn't do it!). How she could think that a cardigan smelling like that would be ideal for a baby I don't know!

I think you should stick to your guns and tell your mother-in-law in as nice a way as possible how worried you are about health and that the professionals at the hospital have also advised you to keep your baby away from someone who has just had a ciggy.

If she was a smoker she wouldn't realise it smelt like that.

Curious_George_2

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

If she was a smoker she wouldn't realise it smelt like that.

i was thinking about this after someone asked me if i washed gifts earlier on in this thread,

do you know it wouldnt / didnt occur to me that there even was a smell,
from my birth there was always someone in my house who smoked, one or both parents... i also spent a lot of time in very smoky pubs growing up, i started myself at 15 and other than giving up while pregnant I smoked 20 a day til i was 30

things didnt smell.... until i gave up, my sense of taste returned as did my sense of smell (and i had no idea how deadened that had become)
I can smell stale smoke from a mile away these days and i imagine its worse for people who never smoked

Gemsgalore

Curious_George wrote: »

the only thing i complain about is the fact that i am an ex smoker... id be a much happier person with a cigarette in my hand

Me too George

I'm an ex smoker, it's only been 6 months ( I miss them soooooooo much). I'm even considering starting again. I don't and never will complain about the smell as I like it. I absolutely adore the smell of a cigar and pipe, always have done, even as a child I wanted to sit on my grandpa's knee just so I could smell his pipe better I know you are all throwing up now, but I even wish I could buy a scented candle that smelled of cigar without the fumes

I have never smoked in anyones house and certainly wouldn't light up near kids or non smokers. However, I would be hurt if someone wouldn't let me near their child because I smelled of smoke. I would understand, but if I'd washed my hands I can't see it being much of a risk to a baby......especially if you are just a relative and don't live with the baby, so it's not going to be a daily occurrence. I did let smokers handle my kids (not while smoking) even though I had given up myself while pregnant.

I guess at the end of the day, we just have to respect folks worries and not take it personally....after all it's not you the parent doesn't want near the baby, it's your ciggies

Curious_George_2

Gemsgalore wrote: »

Me too George

I'm an ex smoker, it's only been 6 months ( I miss them soooooooo much). I'm even considering starting again.

dont do it... i hated giving up, it was one of the hardest things ive ever done and i dont think i have it in me to do it again

if it helps you, i use a version of the AA mantra ... my head cant deal with 'forever' so i say to myself DAILY
I WILL NOT SMOKE TODAY - AND PROBABLY WONT TOMORROW EITHER

its been 3 years 5 months and i still have to do this every day!

*Louise*

Curious_George wrote: »

its been 3 years 5 months and i still have to do this every day!

Well done on going so long :T

OH (stopped 3 years last month) says that the craving never goes away, he would have a cigarette in a second, but it's the repercussions that stop him doing it. (ie. he can go live with his mum!):p

Gemsgalore

Curious_George wrote: »

dont do it... i hated giving up, it was one of the hardest things ive ever done and i dont think i have it in me to do it again

if it helps you, i use a version of the AA mantra ... my head cant deal with 'forever' so i say to myself DAILY
I WILL NOT SMOKE TODAY - AND PROBABLY WONT TOMORROW EITHER

its been 3 years 5 months and i still have to do this every day!

Ok I will keep that in mind. Well done to you :j I know how hard it is, especially when something upsets you, you don't have that crutch ......

It was so easy while pregnant as I had to think that my body wasn't mine and my lungs were not my own either, they belonged to my baby for 40 weeks and then I'd get them back......and start destroying them again!! I got a call to say an old in law had died earlier and I immediately wanted a ciggie to cry with. I don't think I have the strength to do it again either, so I'm hanging in there and hoping this is just another wee blip and I'll be fine I'm putting on weight too (I'm not eating more its just my metabolism has changed) and can't exercise so thats getting me down as I've been slim my whole life....size 10 now a size 14 and getting a big jellybelly that OH thinks it's its hilarious to blow on and make that horrible noise

My lungs will be lovely and clear and I'll die of a heart attack from being overweight and unfit

gratefulforhelp_2

Latest info is that smoke on clothes is a very real hazard. Good that your DH is supportive on this.