Got pregnant by a married bloke

Money_maker

shellsuit wrote: »

He gave you 10K 2 years ago, what on earth have you spent that on?????

Good question.

shell_542

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

Thankfully I don't need any kind of redemption from you on what kind of person I am *phew*

As I keep saying on here, I don't spill my guts about every little thing in my life past or present so I don't have to justify any opinion I give. Who's asking you to justify your opinion? I commented solely on your comments, that IMO they were out of order. Just as you had on the previous poster you scalded.

Maybe I think things about you but there's no point telling you is there - I don't know you and I don't know your circumstances so I would be passing judgement ill informed If I have said something PUBLICLY on this site that makes you think something, then feel free to tell me if you so wish. That's the whole point of an internet forum. You reply and comment on others posts. Things said PRIVATELY should be kept as that, again IMO

No you don't have to run every comment past me, don't be daft. Again, I just commented on your post ... as you did the other poster.

Welshwoofs

The way I see this is very clear.

The Ops says she got pregnant 'accidentally'. Now there's only one way I know that such an accident can happen - failure of contraception. So, was it a failed condom?

If contraception was used, but it's a case of one of those rare failures, then I think the Op has no moral right to pursue the Father for money at all if he didn't want the child. Yes, a woman has the right to decide if she wants to continue a pregnancy, but I don't see that she also has the right to make the Father pay for that child if he didn't also agree to the pregnancy. The only exception to that rule for me is if contraception wasn't used because then it's the man's fault for not attempting to prevent the situation.

Of course legally I'm quite sure she can screw large amounts of cash out of him and no doubt, somewhere along the line, his wife will find out he's a cheating !!!!!! and his kids will find out they have a half-sibling. It'll probably result in the break-up of that family.

The only innocents in this picture are the Op's baby and her lover's wife and children. Currently the Op's baby may suffer if payments aren't increased, however if she whacks him with the CSA then his wife + however many children will definitely suffer.

Loopy_Girl

I'll be the adult and bow out here.

shell_542

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

I'll be the adult and bow out here.

LOL Who isn't being an adult? :rotfl:

shell_542

Welshwoofs wrote: »

The way I see this is very clear.

The Ops says she got pregnant 'accidentally'. Now there's only one way I know that such an accident can happen - failure of contraception. So, was it a failed condom?

If contraception was used, but it's a case of one of those rare failures, then I think the Op has no moral right to pursue the Father for money at all if he didn't want the child. Yes, a woman has the right to decide if she wants to continue a pregnancy, but I don't see that she also has the right to make the Father pay for that child if he didn't also agree to the pregnancy. The only exception to that rule for me is if contraception wasn't used because then it's the man's fault for not attempting to prevent the situation.

Of course legally I'm quite sure she can screw large amounts of cash out of him and no doubt, somewhere along the line, his wife will find out he's a cheating !!!!!! and his kids will find out they have a half-sibling. It'll probably result in the break-up of that family.

The only innocents in this picture are the Op's baby and her lover's wife and children. Currently the Op's baby may suffer if payments aren't increased, however if she whacks him with the CSA then his wife + however many children will definitely suffer.

It is very clear. The law is set that it doesn't matter how the woman falls pregnant, the biological father has to pay. End of. (The topic could be debated about whether he should have to pay, but that's one for the Discussion forum and of no help at all to the OP)

jamespir

shell_542 wrote: »

LOL Who isn't being an adult? :rotfl:

read the words and act on it

DaveLy

missile wrote: »

I am not judging either you or the married man, we all done things which we regret. No way does it cost £500 per month to bring up a child, you are being very greedy.

Greedy?

Fair enough she one the one that wanted to bring a child into the world due the morality of aborting (aka killing) an unborn baby. But now her life is taken up mostly with looking after a child, she could of have instead got a good job, got a nice house, then have kids with them having a future with something to inherit in later life.

Unfortunately with the way our society works (on greed) we are constantly borrowing to fund our current lifestyles which our children and our childrens children will repay. They need our investment and support now so there futures wont be so miserable when the system falls flat. Thus I suggest putting a fair share of any money recieved (due to the high CSA return) into a savings account for the child.

shell_542

jamespir wrote: »

read the words and act on it

Sorry Boss of the Forums. :A

Desperate_Housewife_2-2

Hi tabetha,

sorry to hear about your dilemma and hope you get a plan of action together soon.
I would suggest you contact the CSA and see what you are entitled to as you will need money for you and the baby to live on never mind how this situation will affect you earning potential. Don't worry about previous agreements as you weren't really fully informed as to what your rights were so not really fair to be asked to sign an 'agreement'.

Ignore all the judgemental posts too, I feel sorry that you have had a lot of judgemental posts and the bottom line is that you have asked for help and that is what the forum is here for. You will find lots of help and advice on money saving tips regarding food and baby tips on the old style board and keep an eye on the grabit board for cheap deals on things for the home and baby bits. Have you got a Boots and Tesco card? The points soon add up.

Keep posting and good luck!