Miscarriage support

Leopardlady

HI all, i have not been posting recently, but i am still here.

Hugs to you all, esp Tinks it is tough for both of you! (you can start trying as soon as the bleeding has stopped and they only tell you to wait until after first AF as it helps with dating).

I am struggling with everything in life at the moment, which is hard as i thought i was coping really well.
I went for a job interview last week and was offered the job yesterday, and i know i should be happy about it, but i am struggling.

OH is extremely busy, coming home from work, and having to work in the office at home until after midnight!! So not too many cuddles at the moment, although i know he is there for me.

I just feel that life is running away from me and i have no control over anything, Sorry for the rant, but i am just struggling to cope and don't want to end up on pills to make it better, so talking about it is the only thing to do. I really want a holiday where OH and i can get away from everything and grieve.

Thanks for the planting idea, that would be great and i will have a look around for something beautiful

Metranil_Vavin

Afternoon everyone.

Tinks I hope you sort things out with OH x

I spent last night at my parents. I love them to death but after one night there I just wanted to come home again.

Sigh..just found out there are massive redundancies in the pipeline at work too...up to 20% of the workforce will go apparently...just wahat I dont need right now.

Although had I not had all this MC stuff going on, or realised that what I wanted was to start a family, I think I'd be a lot more stressed out by the work thing right now.

I actually dont really care that much. It just doesn't even compare to what I'be been through.

tinkwings

Leopardlady wrote: »

HI all, i have not been posting recently, but i am still here.

Hugs to you all, esp Tinks it is tough for both of you! (you can start trying as soon as the bleeding has stopped and they only tell you to wait until after first AF as it helps with dating).

Hi good to know you are still arounf sending hugs. x

Is that true can I start trying now????? I haven't had any bleeding since monday at 4am nothing since.......

tinkwings

Metranil_Vavin wrote: »

Afternoon everyone.

Tinks I hope you sort things out with OH x

I spent last night at my parents. I love them to death but after one night there I just wanted to come home again.

Sigh..just found out there are massive redundancies in the pipeline at work too...up to 20% of the workforce will go apparently...just wahat I dont need right now.

Although had I not had all this MC stuff going on, or realised that what I wanted was to start a family, I think I'd be a lot more stressed out by the work thing right now.

I actually dont really care that much. It just doesn't even compare to what I'be been through.

MV huge hugs honey. I know what you mean about parents my mum is doing my head in in the end I had to ask her to leave me be & if I needed her I would call or text her. I know they only want to help but it makes me worse. :A

Leopardlady

Tinks you can start trying now, i asked at the EPU and all the docs said yes, the waiting was to do with dating issues, so go for it if you are ready

tinkwings

leopardlady wrote: »

tinks you can start trying now, i asked at the epu and all the docs said yes, the waiting was to do with dating issues, so go for it if you are ready

:):t:t:):)

portsmouthali

tinkwings wrote: »

MV huge hugs honey. I know what you mean about parents my mum is doing my head in in the end I had to ask her to leave me be & if I needed her I would call or text her. I know they only want to help but it makes me worse. :A

That's kind of why I haven't told family this time. My parents were amazing last time but I know my mum worried herself half to death about me (I am the youngest and her baby :A) and OH's mum did my head in as she phoned all the time to ask if I was OK - sometimes 2 or 3 times a day! I know they love me and only mean well, but it got on our nerves big time! We had to tell them all last time as they knew I was pregnant, but we didn't see the point in saying "we were having a baby but now we're not" this time around if that makes sense - it would have only upset them.

Thanks for all your thoughts on the planting thing, will get onto that

Sorry you're feeling rubbish LL, sounds like you could do with a holiday xx

OH phoned me lunchtime to say he was feeling low today - not like him at all! I asked what it was and he said "Everything that's happened" which really surprised me, I thought it'd be work or something. Just goes to show, I may not think it bothers him as much as it does me, but I'm clearly wrong.

MERFE

Tink I understand the reason you are told to wait is purely dating too although the epu lady told me not to try for 2-3 months this time but that only because I'm now having recurrent miscarriages so she said best to give my body time to heal. I've heard plenty of people that have had babies without having a AF after their miscarriages. However you may want to wait till the situation with OH is better. After my first MC OH and I had some major issues and contemplated spliting, it took 6 months to a year to sort out and although it wasnt all related to the MC this focused us onto a negative path for a while. I was very angry the first time and particulary angry at him because he didnt seem to be bothered in the slightest and I think even said arent you over that yet to me!

I'm so glad we sorted out our relationship before trying again as the second MC was a huge rollercoaster and much harder than the first, although we were prepared, we saw the heartbeat, have a scan picture. Emotionally it was tougher but OH was there with me so I wasnt angry at him and that made it easier, he was in shock after the 2nd.

Ali I have planted things in the garden everytime, I'm not a gardener and they are not normally anything that will last but I've felt the need to have something I can see growing as least for a little while.

Metranil_Vavin

Re trying again, do you not need to wait for a peiod to come and go so you can work out your cycle again??

I havent bled for a few days now either. I have an appt at the EPU next Weds for them to check all has gone, so was going to ask their advice then.

valkirn

Hey all xx

I was told after my erpc that i should at least wait 2 months before trying again, this is for the dating for a new pregnancy and also as there is a slightly higher chance of mc again x

But having been told that the nurse also said if i wanted to i can start trying as soon as the bleeding stopped and as soon as you feel ready to do so x

So i think the ultimate answer is if you feel ready and you want to try again as soon as the bleeding stops then there is no reason you shouldn't, at the end of the day if you do catch straight back on again then scans are more reliable at telling anyone how far along you are x

Your also supposedly more fertile just after a mc or birth xx