The giving up/cutting down alcohol thread part VI

PRICE_IS_RIGHT_2

A total of 24 days for me for March, please Shaggy, and thanks so much for all your hard work

Won't be having any wine for the next few days - never have a problem during the week any more, so I can safely give my total now.

Target of 25 (again) for April, please WBF, and thank you very much for scoring


Happy Birthday, Honeybear!!!

Good luck with your new job, Jo, you certainly deserve it. Your career is now back on top of things.

Have a great week all

xxxx

graemecarter

Wanna_Bee_Free wrote: »

Good morning all,

Shaggy, I'm stepping up to score in April so pass the baton my way. And I'm up to 14/15 MAD so far.

I was AF last night, one of my alternate musn't drink nights which have usually been really easy but last night I was really tempted.

Thinking about HALT I can see this is a very useful one - Hungry -yeah, I'd had lunch and not the healthy snack mid afternoon as in meeting at work until late. Angry - I don't really do anger, only the repressed kind so more upset than angy, and I was. My sense of life not being fair to me and other people being unjust has been an issue at work recently and it's something I struggle to stay calm through. So definitely emotional. Lonely - the one that didn't apply and the only thing that got me through was OH being there although he sensibly didn't try to persuade me either way! And Tired - oh yes, my big one at the moment. I go through phases of not sleeping but recently has been bad even by my standards! And not just after drinking, I've been stressed enough to wake up this morning very early even being sober last night.

I'll get inspired with a theme for April and pick my target and collect other people's from the last few pages.

I had (and have) a lot of that anger. I wouldn't tell people or let them know I was angry, but inside it would hurt me. Most of the time people wouldn't even know or care that they had angered me (some of it was very minor and petty too!)
I have had to let it go. Resentments hurt me the most. I am not in control of other people, so I have to acknowledge that. It's my decision to hold onto anger.
Sometimes I can be right or I can be happy. In the past I always had to be right. I now seem to choose to be happy more. I have to let things go to be able to do that. All I know is that a drink would never make a situation better

graemecarter

DecemberBaby wrote: »

Good morning all.

I can sympathise with the sleep problems and the stress too!
Was AF last night and had a horrible night's "sleep". Tossed and
turned and had really vivid nightmares and woke up terrified

However, despite only getting a few hours sleep, I still feel much
more clear headed this morning than if I'd knocked myself out with
booze and pleased about that

On, the subject of targets, I set a low one as I'd done badly on Jan,
Feb and still might make it if I can be AF for 4 out of the next 5 nights.
I'm giving it a go. Starting with a MAD Saturday night.

I feel I'm slowly getting towards the point of just giving it up.
Reading what the successful giver uppers say about it, is very inspiring
and they also sound happy about it and not spending every day missing it!
Still waiting to hear from the counselling service.

Hope everyone has a good Saturday. I'm off singing all day.

DB x

Very occasionally I miss alcohol, but that thought goes within 10-20 seconds. So for the vast majority of the time, I don't miss alcohol whatsoever.

If I did miss it, then life would be hell. That's why I had to change myself as well as stop drinking. I had to take away the DESIRE to drink as well as the drink itself.
I know for me, my alcoholism wants me to drink. Thus just not drinking is not enough - I need to stay happy and stable, then I won't feel the need to drink.

graemecarter

fedupandskint wrote: »

Yipee a MAD Sat!!!!!

On the subject of sleep - it took a couple of months for my sleep to calm down into a more restful pattern and on the couple of days I have had a drink over the last 2months means my sleep is badly affected and not restful.

I enjoy every morning I wake up after being AF in a way I would never have imagined!

On targets - they are only a number - don't get down on yourself for not achieving as any AFD is better than none. They are there to help not put you down.

Take each day as it comes and for me having the realisation that Fri and Sat nights were the same as any other night helped! They're not special!

Better dash now!

Do whatever works best. If targets work, then set them. If not, then don't.

I take it one day at a time. I CAN go 24 hrs without a drink. So that's my target. Just one day. I say to myself in the morning that I can get through the day without drinking.

I know with targets, alcoholics change their targets/goals to suit their drinking. Normals change their drinking to suit their targets/goals
That's why my target is just 24 hrs only. I don't need to project further than that.

honeybear_2

fedupandskint wrote: »

Well I am back from my 7mile walk in the Dark Peak. After an hour of yoga last night and this my legs are aching so off for a soothing bath in a while to ease the muscles after the climbs today. A lovely day all round. Nearly turned over and went back to sleep when the alarm went off at 6am then thought 'get up and go or you'll feel very fed up when you get up in an hour or so'. Enjoyed the fresh air and the cold wind on the tops at 9am.

Sparkles, not only do I think you're doing really well, I also have to say thank you as your post gave me the motivation I needed to go to the gym...so THANK YOU!!! :T

No updates for me but can feel a 72 Hour Challenge coming on for Monday to Wednesday - any takers?

Marru

honeybear wrote: »

No updates for me but can feel a 72 Hour Challenge coming on for Monday to Wednesday - any takers?

graemecarter

DecemberBaby wrote: »

I'm the same . Just had large haddock and chips plus battered sausage
and have lots of choklit for later just in case and plenty of fizzy stuff.

I've had a lovely day today but mid way through the afternoon the voice
that says you need to round this off by having a nice drink this evening
starts up . I haven't got past the idea Friday and Saturday are drinking nights yet. My AF days have been weekend ones so I can drive if needed
but I still find it hard. Felt all unsettled and grumpy and even tearful
on the way home. It must be great to be past all this PBT. Congratulations
on your 5 months. That's brilliant :j
Just got to grit my teeth and get on with it this evening and look forward
to feeling good in the morning. I know where I want to be and that is
to be someone who doesn't want to drink. Not someone who wants to drink but doesn't. It's been said before that that is a carp place to be.

Just needed to say that as I'm finding it hard tonight.

DB x

I hope you feel better. The key to long term sobriety is knowing that one will have bad days and weeks, but not drinking in those periods. One always comes through the other side eventually, and I am sure that I come through quicker if I haven't picked up a drink.
I found it impossible to be happy when not drinking - there was always a sense of looming disaster and a uneasiness.
This was my alcoholism - changing myself has gone a long way to make me not feel like that now.
I can feel like that occasionally, but now have the tools to deal with it when it does occur

graemecarter

DecemberBaby wrote: »

Thanks Sparkles Its that change of attitude that I hope will eventually come. Maybe it will be a bit better when the lighter evenings come.

I hope it will for you.
I know for me that I looked for external things to change me. However my alcoholism was in me, so I need an internal change. I had to look for it, and it was a painful journey sometimes. It has been worth it so far.

DecemberBaby_2

Thanks GC.

I'm MAD again tonight so that's 8 for me please Shaggy.

This had been my first fully MAD weekend since - ahem - I don't know.
If I can manage the next 3 days I'll make my target so I'll join
you in the 72 hour challenge HB.

Thanks to the fellow MAD peeps who were about on Friday and Saturday.
It really helps to know there are others doing it too.

I've been feeling positive all day but now having a major craving out of the
blue. I'm not giving in to it. May go for a walk,

Hoep everyone is ok.

DB x

fedupandskint

honeybear wrote: »

Sparkles, not only do I think you're doing really well, I also have to say thank you as your post gave me the motivation I needed to go to the gym...so THANK YOU!!! :T

a 72 Hour Challenge coming on for Monday to Wednesday - any takers?

Marru wrote: »

I'm in!
and thank you for your kind words x