How do I persuade DS(age 10) that TV isn't a participation activity ?

luxor4t

Humphrey10 wrote: »

...If a child never learns to be quiet and pay attention when watching TV or films how are they going to cope when they go to uni ?

From what you say your DS is getting into trouble in school now, but this will get worse in Secondary school, particularly if he cannot be quiet in lessons or an exam.
Perhaps you could talk to his school now, as a way to get extra help as the ability to delay gratification (the ability to wait in order to obtain something that one wants) is a vital educational and life skill, the lack of which will affect the whole of his life.

patchwork_cat

Lotus-eater wrote: »

I have to say, if I really want to watch something short, like a bit on the news or the weather, I shout loudly and tell everyone to shut up..... then repeat it a few times when they start talking again

Oooo, I also use the subtitles alot, keep half an eye on the tv and half on DD or DW, or even DS (he's only lickle though and not talking over my tv yet, just gurgling and being sick through it ) Tell you what, these helicopter pilots have got nothing on me, one eye on subtitles, one on the chess games with DD and one on DS to check he hasn't choked on his banana.

It's called multitasking! Usually it is a XX thing, but obviously not in your case!!

OP ask yourself if you have say a little aside to your partner whilst watching? My DD (12)is forever chipping in, but I thought about it the other day and me and DH will say maybe a sentence to each other and that is it, but she will write a flipping essay! That is the thing that gets me, it isn't a quick aside . As to the person who said - their DS says I'd use an AK47 etc - yep that is my 16 year old!! Well I wouldn't have done that much better to use....!

Also OP enjoy him spending time with you - give him 4 years and you'll hardly see him again - only to eat and put his head around the door to say I'd have used an AK47!!!

Lotus-eater

patchwork_cat wrote: »

It's called multitasking! Usually it is a XX thing, but obviously not in your case!!

Depends what XX means I suppose.....

patchwork_cat

Two x chromsomes as opposed to an XY! Multitasking is a female thing!

cloudy-day

Curious_George wrote: »

im sure we all work as hard as we can to be good parents, to spend time doing worthwhile things with them etc so its not about spending more time with the precious child or that we should all sit back and listen in wonder each time they open their mouths for fear of missing their childhood,
but that some times... just sometimes 5 minutes peace would be nice, and if that happens to coincide with the one half decent programme thats on a week then thats even better!

Totally agree, love DS, want him to grow up to be a mature, decent human being......but 'WILL YOU PLEASE BE QUIET I'VE TOLD YOU SIX TIMES THAT I WANT TO WATCH THIS'!!

I wouldn't mind but we've got 2 TVs and numerous other distractions. Why does DS (aged 10) always have to have a big discussion during the one or two programmes a week that I want to watch?

Thanks for listening, rant over! :rotfl::rotfl:

Lotus-eater

patchwork_cat wrote: »

Two x chromsomes as opposed to an XY! Multitasking is a female thing!

The best helicopter pilots are men, what does that tell you?

Yes, that the female MT ability is a myth, men have it just as good, if not better... and no amount of studies, or info that you fire at me will change my mind


Besides I'm concentrating on something else now and won't be able to look at this thread again. :rotfl:

patchwork_cat

Lotus-eater wrote: »

The best helicopter pilots are men, what does that tell you?

Yes, that the female MT ability is a myth, men have it just as good, if not better... and no amount of studies, or info that you fire at me will change my mind


Besides I'm concentrating on something else now and won't be able to look at this thread again. :rotfl:

Where do you get this pearl from?! Evidence to substantiate this please - Yes most helicopter pilots are men, but that doesn't mean that women are not better. Although on the gender specific abilities spacial awareness would be important in this task and and this is not a traditional female attribute!!Although we would stop and ask directions, whilst a man would just fly around in circles!!!

My XX was tongue in cheek - ofcourse multitasking is not gender specific, although women traditionally do have to do many things at once, whereas historically men tended to concentrate on one thing, eg women would have gathered the fruit, tended the babies and trained the children at the same time, whereas men would have only had to try to lure a mammoth into a pit!

Edited to clarify for lotus eater - umm yes I am joking as I knew you were (although the helicopter pilot comment was a bit random). I don't take gender differences seriously! - we all have things we are excellent at and they are not especially gender specific, - although sterotypically I can't park, but I can talk the hind leg of a donkey as I reckon can the OP's son QED!!

easy

Do they do a competition for "Best helicopter pilot of 2010" then ?

CoopCooper

I suppose it must be annoying, but at the same time I'd bet it's better than any of the rubbish on TV. He's got lots of thoughts and opinions that need exploring, not being ignored and shouted at to 'be quiet' effectively advising him it's not OK to discuss issues raised.

For what it's worth I was and am exactly the same - If I don't have someone to hand to chat about and usually make fun of whatever we are watching I'd rather not bother watching at all. For me TV is a participation activity.

easy

CoopCooper wrote: »

I suppose it must be annoying, but at the same time I'd bet it's better than any of the rubbish on TV. He's got lots of thoughts and opinions that need exploring, not being ignored and shouted at to 'be quiet' effectively advising him it's not OK to discuss issues raised.

Coop, he gets tonnes of opportunities to explore his thoughts and opinions, generally whenever the TV is not switched on (and it is never on during the daytime, generally never before 7:30 p.m. at the earliest).
That's one of the reasons we enjoy having dinner together as a family round the table every day, to have lots of discussions.

But he really does need to understand that the world doesn't revolve around him, his thoughts and opinions, 24/7. As parents we also have the right to some consideration, which includes that of watching programmes with him (that he wants to watch), and being able to hear them.