depression

Miroslav

feelinggood wrote:

There are loads of women who want a nice caring bloke who opens doors and pulls chairs out - trust me! If you opened a door for me, I'd be yours

I'm sleepy, not usually up this early. 2 early starts in a row for me! I slept from 11:30-8:30 this morning, 3 hours short of normal sleep! Maybe I'm going to get in to a normal sleep pattern now.

I'm off to watch a dvd and eat cream cakes I think! Addictions I need to tackle: ciggies, alcohol, food and another couple lol. Methinks I have an addictive personality!

Have a rest and hopefully them workmen will be gone soon.

And don't talk about how you are all tall and muscly Miro, do you want me to fall for ya??!!

What I didn't say, was I ask ladies to sit down, but forget to the out the chair back in :rotfl: Not really I'm yours for doing that? oooh, i've pulled

I've been up at either 5 or 6 the last 8 days, on 5 occasions. Sadly, I never get to bed before 11

Enjoy DVD and food!

Workmen here until 4pm-5pm I suspect

I want anyone to fall for me..........right now Anne Widdicombe will do Well, okay, that's pushing it a bit far

can_it_be_different

Sazbo wrote:

Hi CIBD

Thanks for posting. I'm afraid I don't know of any 'websites or forums' that i could recommend. Meeting people on the internet is all very well, and it's cliched I know, but I would say that you need to deal with your own issues, otherwise you will continue to be haunted by them, whether you stay where you are, or whether you move somewhere else, y'know? As I say all the time, easier said than done for sure, but that's just my opinion. We need to be happy with ourselves in order for others to be happy with us. Good luck, Saz.

Hi Sazbo, thanks for your comments and I understand where you are coming from. I know that my major issue is my confidence issue and I do not know how to go about dealing with this. It is not that I ignore the people who bullied me through school - I am civilised to them and them to me. It is just the underlying impact it as had on my life in terms of the confidence. It may sound strange but I think I am a decent and kind person but often feel it does not come across because I am so lacking in confidence and shy. That sounds like a contradiction. And I get so down when I happen to make contact with anyone and I cannot come across as I want to to show them that I am a decent guy (this is for all relationships) and just cant be bothered with anything like work and eating for days on end after it.

I am happy with the way I am, I just get so depressed when no one else seems to think it. I don't project myself well. Or maybe I am just not as decent I think I am :huh:

can_it_be_different

piggeh wrote:

*creeps in from alcoholics help thread*

I am actually in a very similar position to you CIBD, albeit one in which I've actually moved elsewhere and am now a lonely recluse

I live in a fairly large town, and although there are opportunities to go to clubs, socials, etc, I just cant find the confidence to actually go. I never really seem to 'click' with anyone, except some of my close friends who I left behind (although I still visit them as I have no friends down here). Maybe it's me being pessimistic and not 'giving it a go', but I can never see it going well and actually getting on with people really well (I'm not argumentative or anything, just dead quiet!).

FWIW I'm also in my mid-20s and starting to feel like I should have found someone by now, or at least had a few relationships, rather than only one one night stand several years ago. I guess I should actually be giving advice, oops...

Basically, if you move to a city, they'll be the clubs & events to meet people, but you need to have the drive to actually go out and attend them and make the effort to get involved with people. Unfortunately I am a lost case in this regards, so maybe you can do better!

If you don't make the effort then it will make little difference!

Hi Piggeh, thanks for that post. You seem to be very similar to me and it kind of makes me realise I am not alone in suffering this problem. So much of what you say makes sense to me. That is my worry is that if I move then I will just be a lonely reculse as you put it elsewhere. Although it is may be easier being a lonely reculse in a bigger city than the little remote area I live where everyone knows me and the way I am - I probably come across as a boring reculse where I live and that does not help my confidence. It is very difficult to change the habit of a lifetime. I know people will be speak about me and my ways but do not want all my problems out in open - small place and all that. Nobody local really knows my problems and why I am the way I am - even those that bullied me at school will have no idea of the lasting damage that they have done. I want to move on from my past but my confidence is really rock bottom and I am fighting a losing battle. May be being idealistic but feel that if I start afresh at least I will not have this 'reputation' hanging over me. Maybe I will get a leap of confidence if I have to start afresh somewhere else and make a go of it. But nothing ever goes to plan

feelinggood_2

Miroslav wrote:

What I didn't say, was I ask ladies to sit down, but forget to the out the chair back in :rotfl: Not really I'm yours for doing that? oooh, i've pulled

I've been up at either 5 or 6 the last 8 days, on 5 occasions. Sadly, I never get to bed before 11

Enjoy DVD and food!

Workmen here until 4pm-5pm I suspect

I want anyone to fall for me..........right now Anne Widdicombe will do Well, okay, that's pushing it a bit far

I *think* I'm a step up from Anne Widdicombe, so if you are interested...... :rotfl:

Miroslav

feelinggood wrote:

I *think* I'm a step up from Anne Widdicombe, so if you are interested...... :rotfl:

Do you have a pulse?

Do you bathe or shower often?

Do you have the ability to have a conversation?

Are you on planet earth?

Yes to all 4, and i'll get the dinner on

feelinggood_2

can_it_be_different wrote:

Hi Piggeh, thanks for that post. You seem to be very similar to me and it kind of makes me realise I am not alone in suffering this problem. So much of what you say makes sense to me. That is my worry is that if I move then I will just be a lonely reculse as you put it elsewhere. Although it is may be easier being a lonely reculse in a bigger city than the little remote area I live where everyone knows me and the way I am - I probably come across as a boring reculse where I live and that does not help my confidence. It is very difficult to change the habit of a lifetime. I know people will be speak about me and my ways but do not want all my problems out in open - small place and all that. Nobody local really knows my problems and why I am the way I am - even those that bullied me at school will have no idea of the lasting damage that they have done. I want to move on from my past but my confidence is really rock bottom and I am fighting a losing battle. May be being idealistic but feel that if I start afresh at least I will not have this 'reputation' hanging over me. Maybe I will get a leap of confidence if I have to start afresh somewhere else and make a go of it. But nothing ever goes to plan

Moving might help, but it might not. I hated where I grew up - walking down the street I'd see the people who made my life hell. Every day I had to walk past the spot I was raped.
Firstly, I moved 30 miles away, but it was still too near. So, next time I moved, I moved 250 miles away. It didn't solve the depression, but at least I can be me here. I shall be moving on again soon - I've yet to find home. This is as near as I've got. I'm still very isolated, and I still struggle to meet people, but I know a few aquantances that if I pass in the street I can say hello to. Once day, I'll get somewhere I can make friends. Its quiet and small here, and for various reasons, I can't join clubs or anything. I think, if I could get to meet enough people, I'll get some ffreinds. My mum says to just talk to anyone and everyone when you move somewhere new - 9 out of 10 with reject you, but 1 in 10 could well become good friends My mums closest freind, a freind of 15 years, she met in the street, and got talking to.
I'm rambling, I'm a bit spaced out at the moment sorry. Hope some of that made sense?

feelinggood_2

Do you have a pulse?
A fast one thinking about you

Do you bathe or shower often?
Bath everyday, shower most days too

Do you have the ability to have a conversation?
I do indeed, not a sensible converstaion, but a converstaion none the less

Are you on planet earth?
Only just...

Yes to all 4, and i'll get the dinner on
A man who can cook? And you'll pull my chair out! :T :T :T

Horasio

Miroslav wrote:

Workmen are 25 mins early :eek:

9am means 9am chaps :rolleyes:

It annoying but at least they turned up!

blinky

feelinggood wrote:

Morning guys, hope today is better and brighter for you all.
I'm alright today, I'm getting through this. Evenings are harder for me than usual at the moment - I think its becuase I don't have the support at night that I have during the day.
I'm going back to the doctor in just over a week, so hopefully something will come out of that.
I'm going to tackle the smoking, as it costs more - the drink isn't that much of a problem, its more of a coping thing than anything. I've had this 'drink' demon for 6 years, and I'm doing alright with it. With the right support, I know I could give it up completely or reduce it to an acceptable level.
I'm feeling a little blank and numb today, but not unhappy. Tired mainly.
HUgs to everyone who needs them!
Blinky - thanks for your kind words, wish I could be of some help to you like you've been to me. Can I have another hug? You have offered more than enough support, the hugs are very helpful, thank you. I hope you have a good day for you, how are you doing? Are things okay on your end? Sorry if I scared you yesterday, I am not 'that' low, its just all a bit much sometimes, but I will keep fighting. Thank you for the advice on samaritains, I will bare that in mind. Luckily, I've got a friend who I can call most of the time, and that helps.

Smoking is a stimulant and makes you more anxious - I am in the process of quitting / cutting down. I tend to smoke more during the day at work -it's largely habitual to get outside with friends and escape some of the pressure. However, for years it's been my only pleasure. It doesn't cost me that much as I smoke roll-ups (far cheaper than standard fags).

The dry mouth is a common side effect of the SSRI antidepressants. Two other ones are increased sweating and higher body temperature / overheating (+ occassional hot spells). 'R' says that I'm like 10 hot water bottles

I think the numbness is part of an internal defence mechanism to protect yourself from the feelings. It is quite common in depressed people.

As I've said previously I find being at work better than being at home when I'm low because at least I'm with people - I feel isolated at home.

Of course you can have some hugs

I'm okay v.tired - slept in and late for work this morning. Nothing said as I work so hard and I do too much unpaid overtime. Been a busy morning fixing other people's !!!! ups.

Was out with 'R' last night :j :kisses2: :happyhear :happyhear It's still going very well. Didn't want to post about it last night - didn't seem appropriate.

Miroslav

feelinggood wrote:

Do you have a pulse?
A fast one thinking about you

Do you bathe or shower often?
Bath everyday, shower most days too

Do you have the ability to have a conversation?
I do indeed, not a sensible converstaion, but a converstaion none the less

Are you on planet earth?
Only just...

Yes to all 4, and i'll get the dinner on
A man who can cook? And you'll pull my chair out! :T :T :T

So you want my body, can have a conversation, bathe and shower, and you are still on planet earth, even if only just............well you beat 'S' 4-2, so you win

Cook? Well, Microwave's are a great invention

I can cook, just not brilliantly. When I was younger I worked in a cafe/restaurant, but I literally could not stand the heat