depression

EthelBloggs

Sazbo wrote:

Ethel hun, I've just got in, what happened? You twisted you ankle? Are you ok? Do you think you should get it check out hun? Maybe the shivering is shock? You poor thing xxx Yeah I know - public transport was a nightmare this morning - took me forever to get in on the tube this morning. Every bloomin' day it's some problem or other - drives me nuts :mad: You feeling ok hun? Sxxx

EDIT - have got some ice on your foot?

Im fine sazzy, I think i was cold cos I hadn't eaten, lol, am fine now.. bit hobbly but I'll live. i heard something f*kked up with the tube too this afternoon, b/f was half an hour later than usual home but he didn't moan cos he was squashed next to pete from big bro on the tube, he got off at camden town, lmfao b/f still gets a bit starstruck wen he sees celebs out n about, cos he's not a native londoner. spose it's kind of cute really, hehe

hows you anyway sazz? you ok, seems you're a bit late too tonight

Sazbo

can_it_be_different wrote:

Hi all,

I posted a while back now about my issues and just thought I would check in again as life has not approved much and I was looking for more advise on my generally down feeling. I maybe did not make it clear in last posts but I live in a really remote area and it is not easy for example to drive to the next town to socialise and join groups - I live on an island in the Western Isles. For those who don't remember basically I was bullied all through school and have severe confidence issues - I am not the best in social situations. I am now in my mid-20s with good qualifications and a decent job with a caring family. Yet I am always feeling down and sad. I have no real friends I can turn to - although I do have a few but they do not live near me and I have met them through the internet. I do not want to be alone as I am and do not want to turn into a hermit/recluse. I was basically thinking of moving to have a new start.

Since my last post I have actually kind of tested living in a lager city - well not really tested but stayed for a good few days. The thing is it is no worse or no better than it was at home. Without sounding harsh I did not greatly miss my family (although I know I was not away that long) - to be honest I am not too close (but really love them if that makes sense) to them anyway but really they are the only people I have got. I have not really confided in them about my issues. I have always put up a barrier and do not talk things through. And I am not sure I can overcome this.

I think I was kind of confused in last posts in that I was looking for that one special companion. I know that was wrong as more than anything I need friendship more than anything more serious although would not mind the latter.

I did start this post with the aim of looking for advice but do not know what advice I am actually after

I guess I am looking for some advice from anyone who has decided to just go for a new start and how they found it. My worry is that I will not make friends or go out, and just be sad, lonely and depressed (sorry I do not know if what I am going through counts as depression or not) but just in a bigger city. On various short trips I make away each year I do enjoy making contact with people and then going out to meet them - it is not like that I am a recluse and happy in my own company - which generally I am not. Although when I do this and actually leave I am often very depressed and down when I know that I won't have opportunities to meet them again.

I think it boils down to the fact that I am much more comfortable making contact with someone through the internet. As I say there is no real opportunity to meet friends where I am - other than the people I do not want to get involved with.

I am really sorry this has turned into an essay and I am really appreciative of anyone who has taken the time to read. I just do not know where else to turn. If anyone knows of any other websites or forums more suited to my problem please let me know.

I know everyone here has there own issues and the last thing you want is me concerning you with my little problem. At present I do not feel I can offer any meaningful advice to those that post here but I read all the posts and would like to offer my input in the future but my thoughts are with you.

CIBD

Hi CIBD

Thanks for posting. I'm afraid I don't know of any 'websites or forums' that i could recommend. Meeting people on the internet is all very well, and it's cliched I know, but I would say that you need to deal with your own issues, otherwise you will continue to be haunted by them, whether you stay where you are, or whether you move somewhere else, y'know? As I say all the time, easier said than done for sure, but that's just my opinion. We need to be happy with ourselves in order for others to be happy with us. Good luck, Saz.

EthelBloggs

fg.. hows you sweet? saw your thread on the other board, didn't post cos I really din't know what to say that would be helpful. Just keep remembering that you're strong and you can do whatever you want to do if you can keep focussed
*megasuperduperturbohuggs*

Sazbo

EthelBloggs wrote:

Im fine sazzy, I think i was cold cos I hadn't eaten, lol, am fine now.. bit hobbly but I'll live. i heard something f*kked up with the tube too this afternoon, b/f was half an hour later than usual home but he didn't moan cos he was squashed next to pete from big bro on the tube, he got off at camden town, lmfao b/f still gets a bit starstruck wen he sees celebs out n about, cos he's not a native londoner. spose it's kind of cute really, hehe

hows you anyway sazz? you ok, seems you're a bit late too tonight

Hiya hun, glad you're ok. LOL your b/f on the tube next to Pete - I never recognise anyone when I out! And him travelling on the Northern Line - how the mighty have fallen! :rotfl:

Yeah, I'm a bit late. On the way home tonight I had to stop off at a restaurant to pay the deposit for our office christmas lunch. I got lumbered with organising it this year :rolleyes: Well, it cheered me up no end - the manager was this really dishy French bloke called "Laurent" - and after I paid the £180 deposit :eek: he poured me a glass of wine on the house! (I should think so too! ) He was rather nice, "'Ow you say in English?" etc, etc, So that made me feel nice, for once!

Miroslav

:wave:

Interesting night. Got some good comments on my 'work'.

My song was 'very' different to everyone elses, and was told that it was nice to have something totally different, as the other 8 songs, although totally different, were same style etc, whereas mine had a bit of everything :rotfl:

No 'S' though, no text or anything

feelinggood_2

EthelBloggs wrote:

fg.. hows you sweet? saw your thread on the other board, didn't post cos I really din't know what to say that would be helpful. Just keep remembering that you're strong and you can do whatever you want to do if you can keep focussed
*megasuperduperturbohuggs*

I'm alright tonight. I'm sober too - yay me!!
My head is a little confused, I need to simplify my life - hopefully I'm on the way to doing that.
Its scary, terrifying in fact - and very confusing. I still don't think he counts as emotionally abusive, I'm just not the right woman for him, he can't understand me. Sometimes I think he is controlling, but is that just me being ill thinking that?
How are you? x

piggeh

can_it_be_different wrote:

Hi all,

I posted a while back now about my issues and just thought I would check in again as life has not approved much and I was looking for more advise on my generally down feeling. I maybe did not make it clear in last posts but I live in a really remote area and it is not easy for example to drive to the next town to socialise and join groups - I live on an island in the Western Isles. For those who don't remember basically I was bullied all through school and have severe confidence issues - I am not the best in social situations. I am now in my mid-20s with good qualifications and a decent job with a caring family. Yet I am always feeling down and sad. I have no real friends I can turn to - although I do have a few but they do not live near me and I have met them through the internet. I do not want to be alone as I am and do not want to turn into a hermit/recluse. I was basically thinking of moving to have a new start.

Since my last post I have actually kind of tested living in a lager city - well not really tested but stayed for a good few days. The thing is it is no worse or no better than it was at home. Without sounding harsh I did not greatly miss my family (although I know I was not away that long) - to be honest I am not too close (but really love them if that makes sense) to them anyway but really they are the only people I have got. I have not really confided in them about my issues. I have always put up a barrier and do not talk things through. And I am not sure I can overcome this.

I think I was kind of confused in last posts in that I was looking for that one special companion. I know that was wrong as more than anything I need friendship more than anything more serious although would not mind the latter.

I did start this post with the aim of looking for advice but do not know what advice I am actually after

I guess I am looking for some advice from anyone who has decided to just go for a new start and how they found it. My worry is that I will not make friends or go out, and just be sad, lonely and depressed (sorry I do not know if what I am going through counts as depression or not) but just in a bigger city. On various short trips I make away each year I do enjoy making contact with people and then going out to meet them - it is not like that I am a recluse and happy in my own company - which generally I am not. Although when I do this and actually leave I am often very depressed and down when I know that I won't have opportunities to meet them again.

I think it boils down to the fact that I am much more comfortable making contact with someone through the internet. As I say there is no real opportunity to meet friends where I am - other than the people I do not want to get involved with.

I am really sorry this has turned into an essay and I am really appreciative of anyone who has taken the time to read. I just do not know where else to turn. If anyone knows of any other websites or forums more suited to my problem please let me know.

I know everyone here has there own issues and the last thing you want is me concerning you with my little problem. At present I do not feel I can offer any meaningful advice to those that post here but I read all the posts and would like to offer my input in the future but my thoughts are with you.

CIBD

*creeps in from alcoholics help thread*

I am actually in a very similar position to you CIBD, albeit one in which I've actually moved elsewhere and am now a lonely recluse

I live in a fairly large town, and although there are opportunities to go to clubs, socials, etc, I just cant find the confidence to actually go. I never really seem to 'click' with anyone, except some of my close friends who I left behind (although I still visit them as I have no friends down here). Maybe it's me being pessimistic and not 'giving it a go', but I can never see it going well and actually getting on with people really well (I'm not argumentative or anything, just dead quiet!).

FWIW I'm also in my mid-20s and starting to feel like I should have found someone by now, or at least had a few relationships, rather than only one one night stand several years ago. I guess I should actually be giving advice, oops...

Basically, if you move to a city, they'll be the clubs & events to meet people, but you need to have the drive to actually go out and attend them and make the effort to get involved with people. Unfortunately I am a lost case in this regards, so maybe you can do better!

If you don't make the effort then it will make little difference!

feelinggood_2

Ah Piggeh, nice to see you over here
I'm isolated, but due to anxiety and other half, I'm unable to actually get out there at the moment. If I drink I can, but that isn't right.

Sazbo

feelinggood wrote:

I'm alright tonight. I'm sober too - yay me!!
My head is a little confused, I need to simplify my life - hopefully I'm on the way to doing that.
Its scary, terrifying in fact - and very confusing. I still don't think he counts as emotionally abusive, I'm just not the right woman for him, he can't understand me. Sometimes I think he is controlling, but is that just me being ill thinking that?
How are you? x

Big hugs, FG hun xxx IMHO he is controlling, but you've really come so far, faced up to what's terrifying and scary and still pushed on. Good for you hunnie we're all rooting for you xxx

Sazbo

Miroslav wrote:

:wave:

Interesting night. Got some good comments on my 'work'.

My song was 'very' different to everyone elses, and was told that it was nice to have something totally different, as the other 8 songs, although totally different, were same style etc, whereas mine had a bit of everything :rotfl:

No 'S' though, no text or anything

Hiya hun :wave: Not surprised at all you got good comments! Re S - maybe no text better than bad text?