depression

Horasio

blinky wrote:

I think that may be partly the fear of the unknown, which can be a powerfully disabling feeling even when we are well. It affects all of us, even super-confident people. That's one reason we can find it so hard to change (better the devil we know etc). Try not to worry about it at the moment




I wish I could give you a real hug right now as I think you need one. Not sure what else to say other than I'm thinking of you.

Thank you

I just need someone to understand what my needs are. I thought I was going nuts earlier:eek:

Horasio

EthelBloggs wrote:

*needs a hug too*

I'm miserable.

Daughter has been taken ill and been moved to another hospital which is further away and I can't get there because of the bus strike. Cab would cost about £40 each way and I've only got £30 to last the rest of the week and its just soo frustrating!! Her main carer is with her and has promised to call me regularly throughout the night and keep me posted which is a relief but the waiting and worrying is doing my head in.

I'm sat here trying to distract myself and it's not working at all

I am sorry to hear you can't see your daughter. Can her carer not take you and drop you?

Big hugs

blinky

EthelBloggs wrote:

*needs a hug too*

I'm miserable.

Daughter has been taken ill and been moved to another hospital which is further away and I can't get there because of the bus strike. Cab would cost about £40 each way and I've only got £30 to last the rest of the week and its just soo frustrating!! Her main carer is with her and has promised to call me regularly throughout the night and keep me posted which is a relief but the waiting and worrying is doing my head in.

I'm sat here trying to distract myself and it's not working at all

I'm really sorry to hear about your daughter. As CC Star said can her carer, friend or family member not give you a lift to and from the hospital. People can be very helpful in these situations.

I'm afraid my hugs are in demand tonight. 'R' could really do with one but I can't get to her and the best I can manage is a virtual one

feelinggood_2

Ahh, here drunk, sad, wondering what the hell is wrong with me. 2+ bottles of wine.
Yeah x

Horasio

feelinggood wrote:

Ahh, here drunk, sad, wondering what the hell is wrong with me. 2+ bottles of wine.
Yeah x

I'm not blooming drunk and feeling I am losing my marbles and feeling like I am to blame. I know I am not but they have a way of twisting it so it looks like I am nuts. I need someone to understand me but oh no, I have to consider their needs and get nothing back. I feel so alone. I fear being lonely if I leave but I am lonely already and stuck in a crazy place. I feel so different when they are not home compared to when they are. I want to keep away from them, as they upset my equilibrium. I can't do anything that makes me happy, as they will spoil it, so dare not do anything that makes me feel good when they are around.

I have felt so sleepy today and found it difficult to concentrate. I think it is psychological. I had this feeling on Sunday as well.

I feel I have some inner conflict with the mood I need to be in to sort/pack and living with my family.

I was in tears at teatime and got as much empathy from them both as I would have got from a woodlouse. Then my husband says he did stand up for me. I don't recall him doing so. He does that a lot, not do something, then swear he has. I swear he is trying to send me nuts.

I can't take much more of this. Now I am packing, I can see a way out. He will do anything to destroy anything that makes me feel happy. I really hate him for doing this. How can I overcome it and get out in one piece?

feelinggood_2

You've just got to remember what you want CCstar, and try and achieve it.
I can't begin to understand what you must be going through, just try and keep a clear head - easier said that done I know xx
Been thinking about you a lot x

Horasio

feelinggood wrote:

You've just got to remember what you want CCstar, and try and achieve it.
I can't begin to understand what you must be going through, just try and keep a clear head - easier said that done I know xx
Been thinking about you a lot x

I have thought of you a lot too and wondered how you were.

I think you are going through something similar, though there are probably some differences. A man who is making you feel bad about yourself or at very least not giving you what you need.

I can't work out what is upsetting me and making me blank out. All I can say is it came on this weekend.

If either one of them could have shown some tlc towards me, I would have felt better but I feel really odd now. Alone and empty.

I wish I had somewhere to go, so I could just leave

feelinggood_2

I know what you mean - if I had somewhere safe, and happy to go - I'd walk out that door now.
Not that easy tho - things are never simple
Blanking out - does that happen alot? I've realised recently that I forget alot of things - I forget dates, times, people - basic deailts really.
I'm rambling becauce I am upset:(

Horasio

feelinggood wrote:

I know what you mean - if I had somewhere safe, and happy to go - I'd walk out that door now.
Not that easy tho - things are never simple
Blanking out - does that happen alot? I've realised recently that I forget alot of things - I forget dates, times, people - basic deailts really.
I'm rambling becauce I am upset:(

What has upset you?

I attribute the blanking out to blanking out the pain, trouble is it can overflow into other areas that matter where you need to be sharp. When I am happy my mind is very sharp.

Can you not think of a way to leave?

feelinggood_2

I don't know if I can leave, just not yet.
I think I made a mistake with someone x