depression

Miroslav

*opens one eye*

*opens next eye*

*closes them again*

Eurgh, mornings

Oh well, cancellations aside, I can put my head on my pillow tonight knowing it's 'S' day on Saturday

Gonna miss a couple of runnings of a new programme today, but it's repeated a couple of times tomorrow before I see 'S'

It's about Britney, all her music.........it's called...........Divorce Me Baby One More Time :rotfl:

Miroslav

feelinggood wrote:

Leaving? Yup, I plan on it.My life can't carry on like this - it'll kill me.

The positive thing is, you recognise you can't carry on the way life is, or it will kill you.

blinky

feelinggood wrote:

Doctor doesn't take me seriously. I'm just staying with her in the hope I get a referal.
WHY WON'T ANYONE TAKE ME SERIOUSLY? what do I need to do to get help?

:grouphug:

See another doctor - even a different one at the same practice, might be able to help. Ask about available services, changing or adding more medication (I take 2 different antidepressants even at the best of times).

Look to see if there's any local depression support groups - Mind and Depression Alliance are good places to look. They may be able to talk about different treatment options available. One thing which may be useful when you go to visit the doctor is to take an advocate who can talk and push on your behalf. Again a local mental health support group might be able to help here or there may be a local voluntary advocacy service.


Most towns / cities have some form of drop in place where you can talk, e.g. samaritans or a chuch organisation (don't worry - you don't need to be religious).

It does sound OH is being unreasonable but remember depression can severly affect your ability your ability to think clearly. However, I think it sounds like you need a break apart - even if it's a few days. Are there any family or friends who you could stay with. It'll give you a chance to recharge your batteries and it might force your OH to take stock of the situation and be more helpful / supportive.

Thinking of you.

Paul

Miro - wish I could send some of 'R' communication skills down to 'S'. It's a bit of an odd start to a relationship as we both feel as we've known each other for years...

Miroslav

blinky wrote:

Miro - wish I could send some of 'R' communication skills down to 'S'. It's a bit of an odd start to a relationship as we both feel as we've known each other for years...

Well, if the wind is strong enough, it may blow it this way.........:) As long as it's not a result of Sazbo's Sprouts

It's good when you feel like you've known each other for ages, feels more comfortable quicker!

elona

feeling good

Have you ever heard of something called "Cassandra sydrome" suffered by (usually) women who are partnered by men who have Asperger sydrome.

There is a discussion on Delphi forums called "AS partners" and some of the things you were saying rang a bell.

The women are not believed when they try to explain their situation and their feelings are not validated or recognised. They end up having to accompany husband on trips and visits, plan routes etc, book tickets and if anything is not perfect then it is "the woman's fault!"

They are constantly told how inadequate they are but they are not allowed to be upset by this. After years of being "Aspergated" they end up physically ill!

It might be worth having a look on the forums to see if the manipulation and lack of respect are in any way similar. The board has been a like saver for lots of women who thought it was all them!

feelinggood_2

I asked him about the AD's again last night, he said he didn't think it was a good idea.
I thought I'd be blunt, and tell him how I feel. I explained that it hurts just to live, that my bones ache with the pain of exsistance. I don't him I didn't want life anymore, I wanted something else, told him how low I was.
Answer? Get a job.
I won't talk to him about this anymore. I think he realised how wrong he got it - I stopped fighting him after that. I'll just go along with what ever he says, yes dear, no dear.
Then I'll leave when I'm strong enough.

THanks for the advice Blinky
Can't go and stay with anyone - I isolate myself (partly cos he likes me home, partly cos of the depression) so don't have any freinds. Family are 250 miles away, and I don't like them to know I'm ill. SIL told me that they know I am ill, but I don't really want to talk to them about it. Only place I could go is to my parents, or to go and stay in Manchester on my own for a few days. I don't trust meself up there at the moment.

I don't have anyone who can go to the docs with me - don't have an freinds here (or anywhere else really).

I live too far from anywhere - I'm in a village thing - the town is about 2 miles away, and I can't manage that walk.

I've seen most of the doctors at the surgery. I'll stick with this one for now, might as well.

But I've just got to accept it ain't I? Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. Maybe there was a reason Mum always had that everywhere?

I'll look in to Cassandra Syndrome, but it probably wouldn't be that, its just me.

feelinggood_2

Well, I've written a list of whats wrong with, just going to give that to the doctor, hopefully if she reads it, she'll be able to understand.

elona

Make sure the doctor knows that DH has "forbidden" you to take antidepressants.

That should lead to an interesting conversation, you are his wife - not his slave or his dog!

You have rights over your own body and you need to get yourself strong.

Next time he suggests you get a job - say you would not then be able to accompany hin on trips (and "wet nurse " him by the sound of it).

I have a stong feeling that the last thing he wants you to do is to get a job, be independant and self reliant with the confidence to "tell it like it is!"

Sorry if I have been too blunt but it seems he has done an excellent job of isolating you from family, friends, interests and help!

feelinggood_2

Its probably me thats isolated myself.
He hasn't forbidden me - I could take them if I wanted, but he won't give his blessing- so I feel I shouldn't.
This is seems so silly doesn't it

elona

Would he give his "blessing" to anything that you did that did not directly benefit himself?
Are you afraid that he will use you being on tablets to reproach you?