depression

Horasio

Sazbo wrote:

I can only sympathise about the noise CCStar. Think I may have mentioned to you before about the constant noise I get through the walls and floors from my neighbours. And I think when you're not well, the noise affects you even more. Ironically it's not noisy at night for me, but still I don't sleep. Feels like you can't win...

No I don't think you told me about your noisy neighbours but you have my sympathies. What sort of noise is it? It is difficult complaining during the day. The noises I have to endure are parties, building work, very loud kids and barking dogs (not at the same time, thank heavens).

We are wanting to move next year, lots of changes

Horasio

Natty68 wrote:

Hi all, sorry I havent popped in for a wee while.. What with the nights drawing in I've been feeling more and more withdrawn. I hate this time of the year, I normally suffer with SAD as well as my normal depression..ugh!! Can't wait till Spring..lol

Just looked outside and there is a gorgeous pink sky, what a lovely sunset

Have my version of coq-au-vin cooking on hob and veggies all prepared for tonights dinner, so I'm just sitting here going through the net and t.v.

Hi, I am fairly new, good to meet you, it is a great thread:)

I understand about the SAD, it is even worse for me in Scotland but sometimes the summer can bring me down and I don't get SAD when that happens. Enjoying the sunny days in winter is a great help. I also have a lightbox.

The great thing about winter is being able to cook more warming foods such as coq au vin in the slow cooker:)

Horasio

rose07 wrote:

, this is how i feel, but no way to express
feel trapped, confused, and upset
and really in a mess

My parents are shouting
and doing my head in
i really donet know what to do

I am soo stressed right now, hurting deep inside
i wish i could just go somewhere and hide

i feel like i am dying from the inside out
im running round in circles


thats enuff rhyming, think you get the jist, i feel awful, parents arguing and its only me and them, and they dont wear there wedding rings, why would they do this? why would they not want to show they are together?

i wanna cry.....:(

(((Big Hugs)))

It was my parents shouting that drove me away from home into a marriage that wasn't really right. Marry in haste etc - very true.:o

We do the same and I feel ashamed our son has had to take it too.

I don't have a lot of faith in marriage tbh. If I had been rich, I doubt I would have married. I would love to live alone and have a peaceful home.

feelinggood_2

CCStar wrote:

(((Big Hugs)))

It was my parents shouting that drove me away from home into a marriage that wasn't really right. Marry in haste etc - very true.:o

We do the same and I feel ashamed our son has had to take it too.

I don't have a lot of faith in marriage tbh. If I had been rich, I doubt I would have married. I would love to live alone and have a peaceful home.

If I'd have been rich, I'd live alone and probably wouldn't have married either.

Horasio

Aside from everything that's going on here, at this very moment in time I wish I was dead. Companies ripping you off I agree the especially utility companies:mad: people are weirdThey sure can be, just what is the point in climbing up a mountain all you're life. While rich !!!!!!!s have it all and are thoroughly obnoixious.

I wish I was dead. I'm only here for my parents. And when they've snuffed I think I will to. The world doesn't appreciate me. I get criticised. I'm often wrong. And every night I have to listen to drunken prostitutes shouting their heads off at Police cars down the road. Last night 2-shops were broken into and the alarms were going for what must have been hours.Can you move?, noise at home is really depressing And then at 6am the binmen came, talk about making so much bloody noise.

This is not the world I want to be in. What world do you want? I find thinking about what I want can be helpful And when I hear of people arguing over a flippin veil and whether some daft cow wants to wear it in a classroom or not. Please! Talk about creating problems for the sake of it. Over there, they cover up. Over here, we don't. I tend to blot out anything that doesn't directly affect me. I do find seeing just a pair of eyes a bit spooky:eek: , so long as I'm not forced to wear anything I don't want to wear or not want to wear. I get pssed off when people think wearing less means you are 'asking for it', I don't like to wear too much as I feel the heat a lot, not to titilate

I truly give up. I've had enough of just being me alone by myself. I've just had my boobs done too, which I saved up for for years, and now some !!!!!! is criticising that in another thread. Oh God, just leave me alone you bitter calous people.

I read that thread and some of those replies were heartless. There are some oddballs on this forum, I'm surprised they haven't been banned tbh.

I hope you are happy with your boob job, don't let those trolls bring you down. I have seen them be horrible to others.

Horasio

Tiff wrote:

Hi CC
Both forms are relevant. I don't think the label is as important in the end - it's the symptoms. There are actually different kinds of depression. I believe that even reactive depression (due to stressful events) can be included because of the chemical imbalance as you're affected by the negative chemicals your body puts out too. I guess that's why depression is unique in a way - it affects all differently and no-one is identical to everyone sadly or we'd all be cured in a week.
Tiff xxx

I fully agree about chemical imbalance. My hormones were all over the place for 30 years which really got me down.

The last 10 years have been more a reactive depression. If external things, such as neighbour noise, accidents and our business taking off had gone more smoothly, I would have felt better. I still had hormone swings until last year as well, but lots of things have ground me down, so in a more reactive state just now.

Just want to move out of this hellhole and change things. I hate the way things are just now.:o

Horasio

rose07 wrote:

Its happened soo long as i remember, things were quite rough for me as a kid
It is a horrible environment, i have a banging headache from it all.

Just feeling awful atm, as above, dunno where im at,

It is 3 years ago today since the attack, i had tears running down my face at work, dunno why as didnt ask them to be there, just happened.

I hope you are ok hun
xxx

Sorry to hear about your horrible anniversary. You have every right to have a quiet weep.

I would see it as another year away from the attack, time is a great easer.

Horasio

I want to talk about things - I tried for 5 years keeping things to myself, and I couldn't do it any longer. I know things will hurt to go back over everything, but I feel that if I did that I'd be able to let it lie. I've not told anyone some of the things that happened, it feels to big a burden to carry alone.I kept my life to myself for 17 years and it all came out and felt much better, if it helps talk on here, either as a PM or publicly

I just would have like to have gone out for a meal or something, just spent a bit more time together - made a bit more of a 'thing' out of it y'know?I agree, a meal would have been nice, he doesn't sound very sensitive to you

I've had a few sessions of conselling, touched on the problem but never got very far. She was more concerned that I laughed and smiled the whole way through it (can only talk about things if I distance meself from the - pretend it isn't me. I laugh cos its amusing that I'm seperated from myself. Does that make sense?) I'm not wanting a row with OH, so not prepared to go for conselling. Eh.Yes, to start with, you go into social mode but once you feel more at ease, you tend to open up and be honest

I'm alright tho, feeling quite strong, even tho I keep getting knock-backs. I'm fighting to try and get the life I want, with whom I want. Don't know if I'll win, but I've got to try.First thing, identify what that is

Horasio

Bunnie1982 wrote:

I suppose I would call them back if I wasn't having a bad day, might see how I feel a bit later or tomorrow morning

How are you today?

Horasio

feelinggood wrote:

He probably has a point about it making me more unhappy. I'm just gonna keep plodding along for a while. I'm working on self improvement, but tackle who I am inside is too big a step. Changing the outside for now, just ordered my GHD hair straighteners, they better be worth it! I've realised that I don't like me at all, and I need to change. It feels like its easier to change the outside, and then work on who I am inside. Maybe then I'll be happier. Its hard to change when I'm with people who know the old me. I'm wanting to run away again :rotfl: :rotfl:

Its worth just making an appointment, round here the wait is about 2 months, so the sooner you get in the better. Easier said than done I know!

I like the sound of those straighteners. I borrow my sons and my hair looks better too. My hair is 36 inches long, so it looks amazing when it is done.

I know it is difficult when people know the old you but if you look different, they may see you differently too

Make the appointment, the time will fly.