OH Advice please.. bit long!!

woof_12

Bogof_Babe wrote: »

Next time she's due to come and clean I suggest you pop home unexpectedly.

mmm sounds like a plan!!!!

woof_12

Barneysmom wrote: »

If he's home alone all day, why do you need a cleaner? Tell him to do some housework in between whatever it is he's doing?

:rotfl::rotfl:
he is still learning where the dishwasher is ( and thats another thread!!)

emsywoo123

woof_12 wrote: »

:rotfl::rotfl:
he is still learning where the dishwasher is ( and thats another thread!!)

Just being nosey, but how long have you been married?

LegalBlonde

What was the thing about him texting her and deleting it? How did you know he had texted her? And deleted it?

woof_12

Been together 16 years married 13

woof_12

LegalBlonde wrote: »

What was the thing about him texting her and deleting it? How did you know he had texted her? And deleted it?

showed up on the bill

emsywoo123

There seems to be alot of distrust in this relationship............

bestpud

Sounds like he may be chasing her but she's not responding and she was possibly trying to put him off by calling you. Maybe she deliberately didn't answer the door...?

Unless of course there is more going on between them and she is out to cause trouble...

I can't see why she would call you and say that if she is enjoying an affair with him iyswim - unless she wants more than an affair?

Money_maker

TBH, this is all based on your suspicion. Yes, he's lying but she doesn't sound in cahoots with him or she would have backed up the 'need money' line.

And he may well have rung her about your Christmas prezzy (what did you get, anyway?).

After 16 years together, you should know him well enough to sit him down and go through everything as a couple.
Are you feeling a little insecure at the moment? Tell him and I'm sure he will help to sort it.

LegalBlonde

I seem to be saying this quite alot on these boards so I don't want you to think "oh as easy as that is it" but of all the problems on these boards, the root of every problem or potential problem seems to be communication. If it is worth you bothering to post on here about it and ask for advice you really need to TALK to him.

Dont know if you are married but presume you live together and have been together for a bit. I would

(a) Tell him it is really bothering you why did he go round to her house that day when she did not ask him to.

(b) Ask him why he texted someone you hardly know about Xmas presents, did he really not know what to get you. Or if you want to be more indirect to open discussions you could say that XXX you got me for Xmas, did the Cleaner suggest it, it was a good present etc etc.

If you have darkest fears that he is messing around surely it is worth talking to him now to try and sort it out. I don't know why you are not talking about it - if you are afraid he will think you are nagging/jealous/wrong etc surely that is better than going on as you are???