am i being "mardy" ?

quietheart

Yes I'm afraid you do sound mardy and that you are making a mountain out of a molehill.....
If your daughter is only 2 i think it's highly unlikely she's gonna be confused, most 2 yr olds couldn't care less! I would've thought OH sister getting in touch and wanting to see your daughter would've been a positive in your life not a negative?
My sister told my kids they could call her 'mummy' which I found rather bizarre but I let it go, it wasn't worth causing a fuss over.

robpw2

your daughter is 2 so you could introduce your sister as the queen of sheba ans it wouldnt matter not like she will understand anything anyway i dont remember a lot from when i was two

Eagle_1

OH's sis has introduced her girlfriend to my DD as "this is your aunty xx" which im not happy about

Why are you not happy ??
I think you are being petty to be honest. When my DD was little I used to refer to some people as "Aunty". Its just a way of being kinda polite.......innit ?

I think you are seeing problems that arent there. Its not like you see her every other day is it ?
Your DD is little, she wont be bothered wether 1 aunt or 20 aunts are visiting :cool:

mouseymousey99

I do remember that some people were introduced as aunt/uncle, but being told they were not actually related - could you not just explain? I think children take more in that you think, and if they don't understand - you don't have a problem!

luxor4t

We always called my parents friends 'Aunty' or 'uncle' as more respectful than 'Jane' or 'Peter' & less formal than 'Mr Smith': no big deal, growing up we knew family from friend.
In fact I still have a raft of 'aunties', even though I'm over 50 & they're all over 70!

bestpud

You come across as thinking you are better than your sil and tbh I think the same sex bit is relevant or you wouldn't have mentioned it!

The birthday party would not have been an issue unless you were concerned how other parents there would view the relationship...

It was a party and you may not have had chance to talk much but they would have had to take their chances on that. You just didn't want them there.

As for the aunty/uncle bit: I come from a family where we had many 'aunts/uncles' and my ex comes from a family where real 'aunts/uncles' are just called by their first name.

It has never confused my children - when they were old enough to start asking, I just explained that everyone is different and sometimes it's about accepting different ways of doing things.

It's no biggy for goodness sake!

Or are you suggesting she will instantly become attached just because they use the word 'aunty', more so than if they used the word 'friend' or just her first name?

Hardly an issue tbh.

If your OH's family are that petty then it may be better to rise above it rather than meet like with like because you sound every bit as petty to me.

And I can also tell you for sure you cannot fool your children into thinking all is well if you ship them off while you argue, or take off down the garden! She will put her own explanations to that as she gets older and tbh it could be worse than hearing you argue!

I think it's time you addressed you prejudices and either cut them out completely or teach your dd there is more than one way of 'being'.

You can't shelter her forever and you are underestimating her ability to adapt to different situations. It will be far more damaging for her to think your way is the only way!

aliasojo

I find it very strange that people are introduced as aunty and uncle, but judging by some of the replies, this is obviously one of those things that differ from family to family so the OP has to do whatever seems right for her and hers.

Mardy only comes into it if you are deliberately being awkward, genuinely doing what you feel is right for you isn't being mardy, imo.

I think a 'clear the air' chat is needed. Why not invite them over during the hoiday period and sort it all out before a New Year starts?

aliasojo

bestpud wrote: »

You come across as thinking you are better than your sil and tbh I think the same sex bit is relevant or you wouldn't have mentioned it!

The birthday party would not have been an issue unless you were concerned how other parents there would view the relationship...

It was a party and you may not have had chance to talk much but they would have had to take their chances on that. You just didn't want them there.

I don't get any of that from the OP.

bestpud

aliasojo wrote: »

I don't get any of that from the OP.

Different ways of reading it I guess.

That's the problem with the internet sometimes - we can't see what's behind the screen and tend to place our own interpretation on what's written.

It comes across loud and clear for me but I may be wrong.

Of course, the OP will tell me I'm wrong...! :cool:

jamespir

i dont see why you couldnt have met at the party it dont take two minutes to go to another room and introduce somone even when you got 20 kids running round


it seems to me that you were embarresed by your sil choice of partner