Stupid, unrealistic and many other things

redsquirrel80

bloojeans wrote: »

Ok I am going for a "spend as little as possible" day today. I have had a look around the kitchen cupboards and all I need spend today is £2 !!!! lets see how it goes

Thankyou all

That's a good start :T

Hermia

bloojeans wrote: »

What tactics did you use when you felt the pull to spend on things that you did not need.

A technique that works for me is to walk away from the item and say, "you can buy it later/tomorrow/next month if you still want it". If it was only a small thing I'd defer the decision to later, if it's something big I'd make myself wait several weeks and do some research. Most of the time my urge for the item goes and I often find myself thinking, "why on earth did I want that?!".

yellowduck_2

Hi Bloojeans, I can really indentify with you, I really struggle with needing little treats to cheer me up. Am totally skint at the moment as not working and having nothing spare for treats at all. When I was working and if I had a hideous day I would give myself a reward (wine, a book, make up etc, I'm sure you know how it goes), It dawned on me that I was actually depressed and hated my job, had a bullying boss and in the end became too ill to work. So I found the reason for "treating" myself. As for tactics, maybe try visualisng the stuff you already have at home. If for example make up is your trigger and you feel you are about to succumb to the lure of yet another eyeshadow palatte with its dinky little brushes and gleaming case, try to picture what you already own and how quickly the thrill of owning them wore off. If make up is not your thing, use your own particular "must have" item. I also imagine the object of desire cluttering up my house when I am no longer in love with it.! Have you tried the being grateful for 3 non material things each day? Just sit for a few minutes each day and think of 3 things that gave you pleasure that day. It can be something as simple as the sun shining. Today I am really pleased that some indoor bullbs I planted are ready to come out of the dark and on to the windowsill and will hopefully be blooming soo. I had a funny email from a friend and the book I am reading is really exciting. You might find this a bit naff, but it can distract you from the shops.

Ames

I'm on benefits, and like you my money comes in four weekly. I used to be as bad as you, but I've gradually improved. For the spending:

For a few months I used a separate account. I transferred everything in there when my money went in, then every time I needed to spend something (or had a DD due) I transferred it back. I couldn't impulse buy, spending had to be planned. If I saw something I wanted, I had to go home and transfer the money, so I had a few days to think about whether I really wanted it. Gradually it's changed so that I have my money in my main account and transfer amounts for saving.

I also had a policy of never buying anything unless I'd thought about it for a few days first. If it sold out, then it just wasn't meant to be.

Also, make sure you're getting it as cheap as you can. Clothes I get mainly on ebay, I get monsoon stuff at primark prices! Also, because I'm watching them for a few days, I get to decide whether I really want them. And because I'm not going out to the shops, I'm not tempted by other shops and sales and things.

If you really need a shopping binge, go to a car boot sale, there are loads of bargains to be had and a tenner goes a long way, £20 gets you more stuff than you can carry (literally!).

Budgeting:

Every four weeks I do a budget - I know how much is put aside for bills, food, petrol, debts etc, and what's left is mine. Like you say, it's impossible to budget monthly when income is four weekly. So don't try! Adapt budgeting to suit your circumstances.

Savings:

I started with a change jar. Just seeing that I could save a few pennies here and there really gave me a boost to think I could save bigger amounts too. Sounds silly, but it works! I have different change jars for different things. £2 coins are saving for a holiday, 20ps are saving for a new rug, everything else (I even sometimes put notes in there now!) is for a new TV. I used to think that I could never save £2's, because it's such a big chunk of money, but it's easy. Just start with 20ps and see how you go.

I opened a credit union account. £5 a month goes into it by direct debt, and it's my emergency fund. It's a small amount so I don't miss it, but it's there if I need it.

I'm now at the point where instead of having 0 at the end of the month, I have 0 in my main account - but £90 a month saved for debts, a bit in the credit union account, I've had to get a bigger piggy bank to cope with all the change, and I've got more money to spend on nice things because I'm not wasting it on pointless stuff.

Hope all that helps!

bloojeans

Kate, I dont think i will ever change to be honest, it has been a problem for me for as long as i can remember, even my pocket money never lasted more than i day. But as you say "budget what is available"

Thankyou

bloojeans

Hermia wrote: »

A technique that works for me is to walk away from the item and say, "you can buy it later/tomorrow/next month if you still want it". If it was only a small thing I'd defer the decision to later, if it's something big I'd make myself wait several weeks and do some research. Most of the time my urge for the item goes and I often find myself thinking, "why on earth did I want that?!".

Hiya Hermia, i never "need" anything i waste my money on, its all ways rubbish stuff i buy. I want a laptop, with the money i have wasted, i could have had it 3 times over, i will try this though next time i get the urge, which will be very shortly as i have to got out to the shops

Thankyou

bloojeans

yelloeduck, what a fab idea. Today I am pleased because 1 both my self and my DH are working 2 I have my health and my family are healthy and 3 i have to means to be able to put myself right, lots of people dont and dont get into debt.

Thankyou for that yellowduck i will try to do that daily might not get three everyday but i should at least get one

Thankyou

bloojeans

Ames, Thankyou for all your fab advice, after reading your post i went a dug out a birthday present i recieved and never used, its a money savings jar that counts the coins as you put them in and displays the total lat on the top. I have been into my online banking and opened three extra accounts and i can transfer money between them now. 1st account is where wages paid in and dd paid out. 2nd i have named Savings and 3rd I have named emergency fund 4th is i forgot the name but i can transfer money in but not out, i have to go into the bank to do that. Hope understand that babble. I also have my empty Halifax account which is where i'll put "my spends".

Thankyou

bloojeans

And from now on, i do not take out my debit card, when DH comes in tonight, i will give it to him. a bit of an empty thing to do at the moment as there is no money in the bank, but it will get me used to the idea.

bloojeans

Right - next step- how do i get through till the 11th of dec with no money, I am asking myself this. Why do i do this. As i see it I need £250 omg omg omg. there is no doubt about it Im am going to have to borrow yet again. i am thinking about explaining situation to my daughter, she has a good head on her shoulders, (takes after her dad , only good thing about him) DH is my second husband ( first one DDs dad was a wife beater) whoops straying off topic here. Well thought about getting daughter to help me sort things out but how embarrasing is that. Just wondered if it may keep me on the straight and narrow a bit better. Knowing that someone knows, Ive always just muddled along on my own.
What do you think ?

Thankyou for reading