Peoples acceptance of disability/illness

Wendy5704

Homemade wrote: »

I know exactly how you feel. You just need to try to remember that other people cant feel what you are feeling and most of the time they are ignorant to illnesses and disabilities. It isnt their fault though Wendy, its the way society is.

What we need to do as disabled people is to hold our heads high and just be us. We are much more than our illnesses and so we must try to let all that "more" shine through, rather than just the illness part of us....does that make sense?

People shouting at you in the street is despicable, but try not to let it get you down and dont let anyone intimidate you. Smile and walk on, thats the best thing to do for your soul

Thank you

Sorry If you got the blunt of my frustration.

I try not to let it get me down but it doesnt always work. I suppose thats why I try to work when I can because when I talk to people on the phone they dont see me or my disability and Im normal and fit in so to speak.

Sorry again

Indie_Kid

On Saturady evening, someone pretty much said that I fake my disability and only have it when it suits me. IE, when I don't want to go out with them. Clearly, being pulled about by the hospital and having bright lights and eye drops put in my eyes are just for fun.

I find this very insulting - what I have varies a lot. I have days where I can do anything I want (apart from driving) and I'm fine. Other days, I struggle to do things such as shaving, (so much so I only do it when I can - regardless of how hairy I may be) getting dressed or brush my teeth.

Generally, I will save my energy for later on in the week, when I have uni from 9.30 - 4 or when I go to the football. (it's the walk there and back and the fact it's dark when I leave)

How do you explain to ignorant people head injuries, (this affects my memory and causes headaches) visual impairment (and tiredness as a result) and variable disabilities?

Hsl500

Hiya sadly we cant , i have 5 boys 2 older boys have asd and adhd look like nothings wrong but they ppl dont see the violent side when meds have worn off , fact they dont sleep, smash things up, the self harming, just because they look ok i have had ppl telling me i fake it for dla, the fact the cant go out alone and have little sense of danger wander off doesnt come into it.
sorry it makes me so mad I also have a little one who is query cp he cant walk properly always falls over needs a helmet to protect his head , and i had to fight for a suitable pram for his needs , the major they offered me was no good as doesnt lie back and in the end i got one imported from usa with the voucher sceme which they were not happy about but needs must,
i just find it so hard the way we have to fight for everything , from simple starting school and getting the mucvh needed help to being able to just having somebody to talk to when things get too much which is easily done and i often feel how do others do it
sorry for venting
thanks x

Indie_Kid

Apprently noq, I'm "only disabled when it suits me". Also had some rather snide comments last night too.

Oscar_The_Grouch

I have back problems caused by a car accident. I can only walk a short way before my legs give way, so if we go out, we take a wheelchair. One of the issues is in my neck, so I can't push the chair; my wife does.

When I'm in the wheelchair, people will speak to my wife rather than me. I still find it quite funny; people seem to think that because my body doesn't work, my brain is fried too!!

I do enjoy the lift hierarchy too. Before the accident, I would be expected to give way to mums with pushchairs and wait for the next lift, even if the child was walking along beside the parent and the shopping was in the chair. Now, they give way to me!! Why is that? What happend to "first come, first served"?

I'm allowed to call myself a "cripple" if I want, but why is it wrong if someone else says it? It means "a person who is unable to walk or move properly through disability or injury". Well, that describles me doesn't it? Yet even the Oxford English Dictionary (www.askoxford.com) says the word should be avoided!! What happend to "sticks and stones may break my bones"? It's just a word....

I'm relatively new to all this; the accident was last year, so I'm still trying to adapt to what I can and can't do. Why make it more difficult for myself by worrying what other people think or say?

Oscar_The_Grouch

sh1305 wrote: »

Other days, I struggle to do things such as shaving, (so much so I only do it when I can - regardless of how hairy I may be) getting dressed or brush my teeth.

If you decide to grow a beard, I use this trimmer: http://www.argos.co.uk/static/Product/partNumber/4432454/Trail/searchtext%3EBEARD+TRIM.htm

Twist the handle round to number 4 and off you go!! It's light enough that if I am having a good day, I can hold it myself and give the beard a trim. I've only had the beard since "the accident". It took about a month before the itching stopped, but I do find that a trim once every couple of weeks is easier than trying to shave every day.

jazabelle

Oscar_The_Grouch wrote: »

I do enjoy the lift hierarchy too. Before the accident, I would be expected to give way to mums with pushchairs and wait for the next lift, even if the child was walking along beside the parent and the shopping was in the chair. Now, they give way to me!! Why is that? What happend to "first come, first served"?

Well, I always hope people will be kind enough to let me on (I have a walking stick, I don't use a wheelchair.) Not because I am more deserving, but because standing is incredibly painful for me, and I'm usually trying to get somewhere as quick as I can so I can sit down! I'm not going to kick up a fuss if they don't, but it will add to my pain so I hope they do.

Oscar_The_Grouch wrote: »

I'm allowed to call myself a "cripple" if I want, but why is it wrong if someone else says it? It means "a person who is unable to walk or move properly through disability or injury". Well, that describles me doesn't it? Yet even the Oxford English Dictionary (www.askoxford.com) says the word should be avoided!! What happend to "sticks and stones may break my bones"? It's just a word....

To be fair, you've not been disabled very long. There are people that have had it years, or from birth, and perhaps get a little tired of being called names?

I thought the mentality that words don't hurt went out in school, because they do.

It's great the words don't bother you, but they do bother others and cripple has been used negatively for years, and I think it should be avoided.

Indie_Kid

Oscar_The_Grouch wrote: »

If you decide to grow a beard, I use this trimmer: http://www.argos.co.uk/static/Product/partNumber/4432454/Trail/searchtext%3EBEARD+TRIM.htm

Twist the handle round to number 4 and off you go!! It's light enough that if I am having a good day, I can hold it myself and give the beard a trim. I've only had the beard since "the accident". It took about a month before the itching stopped, but I do find that a trim once every couple of weeks is easier than trying to shave every day.

:rotfl:I'm female so I hope I don't need that! (that's why I laughed)

When I'm in the wheelchair, people will speak to my wife rather than me. I still find it quite funny; people seem to think that because my body doesn't work, my brain is fried too!!

I am not a wheelchiar user; but have sometimes noticed this. A friends' son is a wheelchair (well, buggy because he's only 4) user and can't talk. Despite this, I will talk to him. The last time I did that, he just stuck his tongue out at me.:rotfl:

I-Owe-You

I agree fully with whats said here.

I am profoundly deaf - diagnosed in my teens so I have full speech. To look at I look "normal" People often perhaps understandably forget that I cannot hear as there is no immediate/instant visual aid to having hearing loss as apposed to say someone in a wheelchair...

for this i always feel i need to justify my reasons to require assistance and help - (even with my GP and so called professionals sometimes!!) especially as I am only in my early 20s....

Ive learned to cope with my hearing loss, its other peoples lack of understanding that often upsets me.

Oscar_The_Grouch

sh1305 wrote: »

:rotfl:I'm female so I hope I don't need that! (that's why I laughed)

OOPS!!!! Sorry!!!! We'll blame my tablets and leave it at that!!!