Is it time to ban Christmas presents? Blog and poll discussion

anniecave

misskaytee wrote: »

This reminded me of a lovely story covered on the local news once....
it was the story of a couple, who had been married for many years and each year they sent the same original card to each other with a new additional messege for the year it was sent, of course they had to add extra pages to the original card as the years passed and they ended up each with a mini card booklet documenting the many christmases they had shared together....It was really heart warming and they both treasured their cards ~ beats putting them in the recycling!

My Dad and my uncle do that on their birthdays - I think they've given the same card back and forth to each other for about 15 years!

It's really funny reading it too....

JulieGeorgiana

Excellent Article!!!

I completely agree, although I give gifts to a wide number of friends and family, I hand make all my gifts and my costs are very low!

The only person I spent money on this year is my son! Normally (if things were better) he would get a little money to spend on me and my Husband and my Husband will buy something small for us both too! But this year it was just my son!

When I started giving people HM gifts they were taken aback by it all, and some were upset that they got low value gifts while we got high value gifts. Yet they were forewarned about the move! What upset me was the HOURS of work I put into making their gifts and because it didn't cost a lot... they got snubbed!

HOWEVER, this is the third time they will get HM gifts, and I noticed that people who have little money (My mum) feels less guilty about spending less money on us... her gifts have become more thoughtful!

One friend got me a Ceramic Chicken (to hold my eggs) in a charity shop, just because she knew it was something I really wanted and couldn't find on in the shops. She realised that it was the thought that counts!

And she has very little money too!

It's a cycle! And the longer I persevere the more people who slow their spending and are grateful for it

dirtmother

I have comfortably off friends I never see these days. I don't do a lot of present buying for friends and I suggested that perhaps it was time we stopped. Her response was that she understood but that she did love the surprise - the only gifts they would get that were - and although we don't have a lot of contact, the fact that their gifts to us are always things we like does suggest that there is still enough personal connection.

I have never felt that just because someone buys me a gift I have to give them one - sometimes I do start doing it because they have but equally there are people I buy for that we don't get gifts back from. Sometimes I will buy a gift because I will actually be seeing them and won't if we don't see them.

I am not sure where the thing about 'presents only for the children' comes from - they are the ones most likely to be overloaded! We did it one year and I said after that that I was not doing that again, that other family members could buy or not buy but I would be buying, not spending a great deal, perhaps not spending evenly (so long as one person doesn't always get the high spend and another the low) I like to see people's wish lists.

I must admit I've enjoyed it more since I decided I should have my own stocking and fill it myself. Knickers, shower gel that kind of thing. My immediately family get their stocks of shampoo, soap, underwear and socks for the year at Christmas! I tend to buy more 'ethical' options.

Hand made gifts can work out a *lot* more expensive - and they can be non-consumable clutter which can't easily be passed on to a charity shop. I think the business of '20% off at ELC' or '3 for 2 at Boots' actually contributes to a lot of overspending on gifts which would be better not bought or given.

Christmas cards - a chance to catch up with people. I hate the sort from people you don't hear from otherwise which don't have a note in, year in year out. A nice card with some news exchanged. E-cards are no substitute.

vmachina

Many years ago my sisters and I agreed that we would no longer buy presents for each other's spouses and children (this now includes grandchildren).

It has proved very successful because we have been able to spend what we wanted to spend on our own immediate family. At work we simply agreed that no presents would be exchanged and I have the same agreement with friends.

This has saved a huge amount of time and effort over the years and no-one has felt deprived in any way. It just took someone, me in our case, to have the courage to make the proposal in the first place for it to be gratefully received by the others involved.

Give it a try - it really does work!

mintedmatty

In recent years as the xmas present list has got gradually bigger, the Mrs and I decided to spend just £50 on eachother. We buy joint gifts for parents,siblings etc and I have a challenge of finding the most exciting gift for £5 for each the Mrs' niece and nephews. Last year I it the jackpot with some 'shrek ears' headband that is still a favourite for the niece. It goes to show that huge amounts dont need to be spent and this year I think my whole budget will be around £150 which i dont feel is that bad considering the number.

Stryder

Oliver Cromwell banned Christmas almost 400 years ago - and I am a traditionalist republican! let revive a 400 year old tradition

tingly

I reckon if you have to think really hard what to buy someone, then they really cant need anything.
For example if someone needed gloves , you would just buy them gloves, but if you really have to think, then they cant need anything.
so maybe better to buy for someone who has a real need, ie hat scarf and gloves to people in homeless shelter etc.

ihatebt_2

I think presents should be for immediate family and maybe close friends that might be coming round for Christmas dinner. Secret Santa can be a bit of fun at work, as long as it is limited to a fiver.

What I think needs to stop, is this culture of giving presents to the teacher, plus the classroom assistant, and even the lollypop lady too - just why did this nonsense ever start? Many of the mums at school are always moaning about how tough things are at the moment, yet you can guarantee they'll open up their purse to buy a present for the teacher this Christmas. Why?

I know a teacher who comes home with 12 boxes of chocolates and 12 bottles of bubble bath each Christmas! And then 12 boxes of chocolates and 12 bottles of bubble bath at the end of summer term each year!

ebee01

My 12 year old daughter recently gave a speech about Christmas and I have included it below. I have to say that when I was a girl, we gave presents that were essentials. I remember receiving vests, scarfs and gloves. Sometimes a special winter coat or even a party dress. My grandparents encouraged me to make my presents and I think we should look to this example more at Christmas. I don't really remember any of the "expensive" gifts I have received over the years for birthdays, Christmas and the like; but I do remember 2 very special presents and even to this day I am reduced to tears at the fond memories I have of receiving them. One was a cooked meal. A friend of mine knew that I was working hard (as was she) and had little time to feed myself properly. She came home from work during her dinner break and cooked me the most fantastic meal, then had to leave to return to work. Her gesture, giving up her precious time to think of me is so moving. Another friend baked me a wonderful cake for my birthday, a strawberry gateaux. Again, the gesture of using her own time to make something for ME. So personal. I would encourage you to think of giving useful gifts from your hearts, not from the shelves.
My chldren always make Christmas cards for us and they have become treasures of their childhood, I wouldn't throw them away! Don't get into debt, enjoy having family and friends around for a meal and fun games.

My daughters speech:


Have we lost the true meaning of Christmas?
So what is the true meaning of Christmas? Christians would say it is about the birth of Jesus Christ born to save mankind from their sins.
Although that makes Christmas appear to be exclusive to Christianity, Christmas is actually celebrated in most countries around the world. Many Christians are happy for people from other cultures and beliefs to celebrate Christmas, especially if it means that they learn about the Christian message. But the input from all the different cultures has created a distortion of the Christian celebration.
Decorations, advent calendars full of advertising.
For example, many people have forgotten that the Christmas tree was meant to symbolise Christ being at the centre of every household and the star at the top represents the star of Bethlehem. Decorations are now modern and “stylish”. I have seen many Christmas trees with sparkly baubles and pink tinsel that has nothing to do with Christianity. Furthermore, the mass production of artificial trees together with chopping down real trees, (that are thrown away after Christmas) is bad for our environment.
Many of the attractive decorations we see in the streets are set up around shops and are designed to encourage people to spend more money not reinforce the Christmas message.
Advent Calendars:
It is also really hard to find advent calendars with a picture of the nativity. Today the calendars are more about advertising brands rather than being reminded of the nativity. Advent calendars don’t need to have chocolates in them.
Each year my nana sends me a beautiful advent card where you open the flap and find a lovely picture underneath. After opening all the flaps the story of the birth of Jesus is revealed. This is one of my fondest memories which future generations may not have the chance to enjoy.
Santa Claus
Father Christmas has become so over commercialised that many people forget that Santa Claus is Saint Nicolas, the patron Saint of Children, who had a kind heart and helped the poor.
The Santa Claus was first branded in the 1920’s to promote Coca Cola.
Santa Claus has now become the father of advertising and couldn’t be further removed from the kindly St Nicholas of hundreds of years ago who concentrated on spreading joy.
Consumerism causing parent and peer pressure – leading to presents, Loss of quality family time.
Christmas doesn’t have to be commercial to be enjoyable. During the war years people didn’t have money to buy presents and the shops weren’t stocked with the latest gadgets. Dinner was home grown and most presents were homemade. Cards would be recycled and everything was made with love, not shop bought.
During that time, children would learn valuable skills like knitting, sewing and cooking. It was about family time not TV time.
Unnecessary and wasteful consumption of food and goods.
In the children’s film “The Grinch”, people receive hundreds of presents that just end up in the “garbage” each year. Presents that people don’t really want or need.
In the story of the Grinch, we learn that even though the Grinch has stolen the presents, the decorations and the roast beast, people can still enjoy themselves and appreciate what they have without the trimmings.
But, with manufacturers going all out to promote unnecessary items to tempt us each year, people dread Christmas because they worry about the cost of presents, facing debt and keeping up with the growing demands to put on a better “show”.
Jobs
Manufacturers may argue that Christmas is an important time because it creates hundreds of jobs.
But let us think about this.
Are these really jobs we wish to see created? Where are our presents made and who by?
In countries like China and India, children have to work for little or no wage.
For these children who may not receive a present at all, their lives are made a misery to satisfy our demands for cheap products.
All of this seems to makes our modern day Santa a fraud. How can Santa Claus claim to look after children, when he happily encourages child labour and poverty each year?
Does anyone think about the carbon footprint and the cost to the wildlife?
What of the tons of packaging that is used to make our presents look bigger and better than ever? It creates tonnes of un-recyclable waste.
Sadness
Perhaps the saddest thing about the over commercialisation of Christmas is that we forget about those less fortunate than ourselves.
Watching the news filled with stories of hunger, disease, war, homelessness and death, I know that all of that will be over shadowed in the frenzy of opening presents.
One of my favourite ways of thinking of others is putting together a shoe box full of gifts for those less fortunate than ourselves. Gifts that we take for granted, like toothpaste or soap, but which are very precious to the recipients. In the same way that Saint Nicholas helped the poor.
I hope you enjoy Christmas - in its simple form - this year.:A

dstr

I totally agree with this article. I recently wrote this poem to text/email to friends to try and push the point home with an element of laughter. Feel free to use it yourself!!:::

Well here's wishing you all seasons greetings,
And joyful drunken gatherings and meetings.
For that is what gives me a real lift,
Rather than panicking about a card and a gift.

So this year all I request of you,
is fun and frolics on an evening or two.
I wish you all good luck and prosperity
In these times of cutbacks and austerity!

This Christmas I will donate to a good cause,
and at my own fortunate position think and pause...
Good food and company is what's important to me,
But I still ain't putting up a sparkly christmas tree!