Lilmissmups what will 2010 bring diary!

Souk08

Delete him Dawn! You NEED to get back to where you were before this a****** got back in touch. He's in control just now, you need to get your control back.

And remeber 'Get out of my way, I'm fabulous!' XXX

lilmissmup

To be honest its getting beyond a joke now, I have asked him a million times (or so it seems) to leave me alone and its actually starting to feel like harrassment now, its freaking me out that he is determined to have the last word and refusing to admit hes done a bad thing.

His exact words were as follows:

everything you said in that last email was not true. just want you to know that. the absolute last thing i wanted to do was hurt you more... if you wish i was dead and rot in hell then so be it.. didnt want our last words to be like this

I have never said I wished he was dead, hes twisting things now.

If I block his email what will he start then?

Karen_30

lilmissmup wrote: »

His exact words were as follows:

everything you said in that last email was not true. just want you to know that. the absolute last thing i wanted to do was hurt you more... if you wish i was dead and rot in hell then so be it.. didnt want our last words to be like this

I have never said I wished he was dead, hes twisting things now.

If I block his email what will he start then?

He is playing with you now - he knows you are vulnerable and just wants the last word. My only advice would be not to reply, that is the best thing and in effect you rise above his mind games and him pulling on your heart strings.

Be strong Dawn, always about if you need a chat as know despite everything this is a tough time for you xxx

lilmissmup

In good news I am off to see Pink in a VIP box at the O2 on the 8th December, perk from work, going with another girl from work as I invited her as only 3 of us actually wanted to go and one couldn't get time off so YAY!!!! :j:j:j:j

Should be a good night I love her new album although its a bit depressing cos its all bout her break up with her ex! But positives freebie and posh box :j

lilmissmup

Karen_30 wrote: »

He is playing with you now - he knows you are vulnerable and just wants the last word. My only advice would be not to reply, that is the best thing and in effect you rise above his mind games and him pulling on your heart strings.

Be strong Dawn, always about if you need a chat as know despite everything this is a tough time for you xxx

Cheers hun, I just don't get him and the change from loving each other to this :rolleyes:

Karen_30

lilmissmup wrote: »

Cheers hun, I just don't get him and the change from loving each other to this :rolleyes:

None of it makes sense right now and emotions are high. Just do what you have to do and look after yourself - you are no 1 now. Take each day as it comes, don't put any pressure on yourself.

Keep smiling xx

Karen_30

lilmissmup wrote: »

In good news I am off to see Pink in a VIP box at the O2 on the 8th December, perk from work, going with another girl from work as I invited her as only 3 of us actually wanted to go and one couldn't get time off so YAY!!!! :j:j:j:j

Should be a good night I love her new album although its a bit depressing cos its all bout her break up with her ex! But positives freebie and posh box :j

Very jealous - her songs are very good, although sometimes depressing they do tell a story.

That's a night out to look forward too xx

suburbanwifey

lilmissmup wrote: »

I am in a bit of a grump today, I haven't had much sleep last few nights, my darling Spencer hasn't liked the clock change and has been waking me up even more in the night than normal, he gets fee about 3/4am so I have today spent £25 on an automatic cat feeder which I have programmed to go off in the night about 4am in the hope he might let me sleep more....

Also will come in handy if I need to go away overnight, my Dad normally comes in but if I move away *fingers crossed* it will be needed more. Its only a two meal one, might have to get the bigger one eventually.

Thing is Spencer used to go out after his early morning meal and I can't let him out in the middle of the night here as hes not used to the area even though is now chipped and pinned and I haven't had much opportunity to let him out as its dark in the evenings now and I have to sit on the doorstep so he can see me and know where he is.

My dads managed to nark me a little today, just because I said Spencer was winding me up he said I should give him away and gave me the speech that he always gives me that I should never have got two cats and should have only stuck with Izzy. :mad:

Well yes but I also expected to be well on my way to buying a house now with the man I thought was going to have my babies :rolleyes:

Anyway I must get a plan of action going.

Heres the current options I can see.

1. Stay in this town and in my job that barely covers the bills now I live alone and has no career prospects, with no social life due to nothing to do around here and also risk seeing my ex all loved up with someone who obviously is more amazing than me and worthy of growing up for one day and who will be the mother of his child....
2. Stay in my town whilst I keep hunting for a job mainly in London but struggle as won't be able to afford to keep traveling for interviews,with no social life due to nothing to do around here and even less money and still risk seeing my ex all loved up with someone who obviously is more amazing than me and worthy of growing up for one day and who will be the mother of his child....
3. Save up cash for a few months (somehow!), quit my current job and move to London and try and find a perm job whilst temping and surviving on the cash I have saved but be without my cats and hope my Dad can look after them without giving Spencer away...
4. Win lottery, travel world with the cats and find the man of my dreams.

I want to go with option 3 but I don't wanna lose my kitties, lost enough this year

Advice welcome, I feel so lost....

I'd advise strongly against every leaving your cats behind. Animals, especially cats are often more reliable and loving than people. They are your family. Together you are a little family, even without the BF who has gone (so sorry for your loss, just read your entire thread, but you sound strong and amazing and me thinks it's his loss at the end of the day)

Jobs come and go, homes come and go and time passes, but your kitties will always be there for you, i'd like to see you always be there for them. They would be amazing company should you move away to a new town and know no one...you stick by your little family is my advice, they won't let you down *hugs*

Fire_Fox

lilmissmup wrote: »

His exact words were as follows:
everything you said in that last email was not true. just want you to know that. the absolute last thing i wanted to do was hurt you more... if you wish i was dead and rot in hell then so be it.. didnt want our last words to be like this

I have never said I wished he was dead, hes twisting things now.

If I block his email what will he start then?

((((hugs))))

I want, I want, I want: it's still all about him. :mad: Broken record technique my darling don't get drawn into a dialogue, whatever you have sent in an e-mail before literally just copy and paste the bare bones each time, he will eventually notice that you can't be arsed to write something new. :rotfl:

lilmissmup

Thanks surburbenwifey for reading. I am moving home for now and the cats are coming with me.

FF, and all.

I must confess I sent him one last email saying I can't do this anymore, literally begging him to leave me alone and I told him I don't need a reply.

Your right that its all him, he wanted to leave me, he wanted to be free but now he still wants to have me around.

All I want is to be left well alone as he has ruined any chance of us being friends now in the future, and by friends I really mean just beinhg civil if I need too.

Any more replies and hes blocked on email, just saddens me so much we have gotten to this stage.

I have actually made a doctors appointment for tomorrow to try and get some extra support, my depression is creeping back up on me because of all this stress and I told him that too.