Day by day...

muppet83

So faith how is the new job? Managing to get any better night sleeps?

I hope all is well and you're settling in nicely!

faithcecilia

Things are going okay, thanks. It is taking some time to adjust, but I knew it would. All in all I am very happy, and very glad to be working, I'm just not somwone who can mentally 'cope' with being out of work - I need the focus and the knowledge that I am earning my keep.

ceridwen

Well....I notice there was no sign of you being "up and about" during the night last night....and I am wondering if thats a positive sign - as in maybe you had a decent nights sleep last night?? If so - that is a BIG positive sign - judging by just how many sleepless nights I have noticed you have had.

Could be things are "on the up" maybe?:D

faithcecilia

At this precise moment I AM SITTING ON THE FLOOR IN MY NEW HOME SOBBING MY HEART OUT BECAUSE DESPITE FEELING VERY LOVED AND WANTED AND ACCEPTED, i'M SIMPLY NOT 'HOME'. And I've had caps lock on, sorry, not intentional.

muppet83

You'll get home again, just sit back and enjoy the journey. Very few people are were they want to be but there are plenty of other things to keep us going.
But there's nothing wrong with a good sob, let it out, brush yourself down and open a bottle of wine.

ceridwen

faithcecilia wrote: »

At this precise moment I AM SITTING ON THE FLOOR IN MY NEW HOME SOBBING MY HEART OUT BECAUSE DESPITE FEELING VERY LOVED AND WANTED AND ACCEPTED, i'M SIMPLY NOT 'HOME'. And I've had caps lock on, sorry, not intentional.

Well - theres a bit of mental adjustment time in any change of situation for any of us Faith. Cut yourself some slack - it will take a bit of time to re-adjust to a different set of circumstances again - it would for any of us.

And remind yourself of that phrase you just used "feeling very loved and wanted and accepted". That has got to be a pretty good way to feel hasnt it? - and you forgot one bit in that phrase didnt you? As I know where you are right now - then I would say you also need to add "and needed" into that phrase. So - it reads:

"feeling very loved and wanted and accepted - and knowing I'm needed here".

You've got that purposeful work you wanted/needed - that has got to be a large positive point here.:D

The language you would use is different to my own - but in your language you could say "God has work for you right where you are now". As I understand it - being a nun is about a life of service - right now "God has service for you to do right where you are now". I would think it is wise now to accept that "God has placed you there and trust He has done it for good and all shall be well".

(I may have got a bit tongue-twisted speaking in very different language to what I myself would use - but I guess you will get it a lot easier than if I spoke in my own language.)

Now pick yourself up/dust yourself down and when your days work is finished go for a walk exploring your new area.

EDIT: request from ceridwen time - come back and tell us you have located the local library and a church of your choice for yourself and the nearest park or bit of countryside.

ceridwen

...and now I'll go back to speaking in my own language Faith:
"You are where you are right now for a reason - this is not chance. You are making a very important lifetime friendship right now. Who knows in which way it IS important - but it is. Time will tell as to how. Right now - you are meant to be exactly where you are."

Don't worry Faith - everything will be fine.:D

faithcecilia

Oh I'm pathetic today! I can't seem to pull myself together or do anything. Every five minutes I'm crying, and although I have had lots of time to myself today I haven't managed to finish unpacking or anything, just sitting on the floor being daft!

ceridwen

Hi Faith

it'll come...it'll come lass...

Maybe - at a practical level - you could set yourself a target of 30 minutes unpacking/getting yourself organised.

23rdspiral

hey cecelia, it's ok. you know that. this is only the initial adjustment, upheaval and pannic again. you've done it before, and survived just fine.

lots of good advice here. 30min sort out: bit of chocolate: another 30 min sort out: glass of wine: repeat?