Single and in Debt Part 3- The problem of surplus and excess women

lilmissmup

Carole can i have some of the magic getting over ex fairy dust, i have had a crap 24 hrs cos of mine and his mother *who bless her meant well but has just caused me upset*

CaroleM_3

Sorry Lilmissmup, its taken me since the 27th of December to find that little bit, and I dont know how i managed it (god thats pathetic! I need a life!)

Just keep in mind that as much as they care and mean well, no one else can truly understand how it feels to be you right at this moment, so mope away until you feel like stopping and block out anything you dont want to hear:)

lilmissmup

I think i am doing better, i was for a whole 9 days with no contact with him but his mum bless her seems to think we are gonna get back together and rang my dad to see how i was doing as the ex won't talk to her about us and it just sets me off crying my eyes out again and then i try to speak to him and he will talk via text about normal stuff but anything else he ignores me and he ignores my calls. Like last night i wanted to speak to him about his mum and he just ignored my texts

Now i feel like an idiot and that he must think i am loopy, last time i saw him it ended ok, i was crying but it was civil, now it feels nasty again as he just ignores me and makes me feel like a stalker although i know i am not.

How can they go from being a best friend and lover to this? :rolleyes:

I wish i hadn't bothered cos i was ok and happy at least our last contact was civil.

SunderlandBlackCat

Lula-Hula wrote: »

Morning SBC,

cant beat good old B.O.T or if you're adventurous & slightly less skint then a jacket potato with baked beans is very nutritious. Not a fan of beans myself but have been rescued from starving by them many a time :rolleyes:

Just plain cooked pasta with a bit of butter, salt & pepper is another favourite too.

If I didnt have a child I reckon I could live on £10 a week ( have allotment for veg )

I forced myself to eat on £10 per week when I was coming to the end of my unsecured debts in order to knock a couple of months off the eventual dfd. It led to some "interesting" combinations of ingredients if I didn't get my plans & batches right. I don't have an allotment though & prices have gone up a lot in the last 2½ years so I probably couldn't do that now.

My current scheme since my employers started laying people off is only living on the amount I would get on Jobseekers Allowance. The only things I exclude is petrol which I wouldn't be paying if I was unemployed & Council Tax which I wouldn't need ot pay according to entitledto.org. Everything else I earn is being split between overpaying my mortgage to get it down to the amount I would get in a redundancy payment, building up an emergency fund & my OU course fees.

SunderlandBlackCat

niclj wrote: »

I think a diet consisting of cornflakes and beans on toast could work. Possibly!

I have got everyone at work bringing their lunch in rather than buying it! Even the boss - although not sure how long that will last.

I got a mini fridge off ebay for under my desk that's just about big enough to keep a weeks worth of lunches in & thats been a massive help in keeping the lunch cost down. I've had it 3 years no & it's repaid the £20 it cost many times over by now. A sandwich delivey firm comes in for half an hour on a morning & they charge between £1.50 for a basic sandwich in a smallish bun :shocked:.

CaroleM_3

lilmissmup wrote: »

I think i am doing better, i was for a whole 9 days with no contact with him but his mum bless her seems to think we are gonna get back together and rang my dad to see how i was doing as the ex won't talk to her about us and it just sets me off crying my eyes out again and then i try to speak to him and he will talk via text about normal stuff but anything else he ignores me and he ignores my calls. Like last night i wanted to speak to him about his mum and he just ignored my texts

Now i feel like an idiot and that he must think i am loopy, last time i saw him it ended ok, i was crying but it was civil, now it feels nasty again as he just ignores me and makes me feel like a stalker although i know i am not.

How can they go from being a best friend and lover to this? :rolleyes:

I wish i hadn't bothered cos i was ok and happy at least our last contact was civil.

Sorry, I dont know the answer to that, its like they click their fingers and magically go from loving you to hating you.....I think if I was in your place I would stop speaking to him, to give yourself the peace and quiet and time to start getting over it, and ask your Dad to ask his mum to stop calling, should she call again. If it feels nasty now, I would just walk away, because its only going to hurt you and you seem like a lovely girl and deserve so much better! :grouphug: Have a dodgy looking hug xxxx

niclj

Buying lunch is so expensive isn't it.

I'm lucky because there is a fridge and a microwave in my office so can take all sorts of food in.

SunderlandBlackCat

CaroleM wrote: »

It wasnt a problem in the end, he didnt come out as he had rugby on Saturday, he's lovely but.....I think it would be a bit creepy to be honest :eek: :rotfl:

How so? I could understand you thinking that if he had just turned 16 but you're both consenting adults & if you both like each other where's the problem?

lilmissmup

CaroleM wrote: »

Sorry, I dont know the answer to that, its like they click their fingers and magically go from loving you to hating you.....I think if I was in your place I would stop speaking to him, to give yourself the peace and quiet and time to start getting over it, and ask your Dad to ask his mum to stop calling, should she call again. If it feels nasty now, I would just walk away, because its only going to hurt you and you seem like a lovely girl and deserve so much better! :grouphug: Have a dodgy looking hug xxxx

Cheers hun, i was doing well, am back on the no contact thing again, hopefully last longer than 9 days this time.

Hate it when people say they want to be friends, we can still talk, i still care etc.

Cos yes he cares but not enough.

On the lunch topic so i dont annoy you all.....taking lunch is so much cheaper i agree, i try too but do have lazy days. I am gonna really try and focus on money again for a while, need to ensure this is one thing i stick to doing with lunches.

sarahb123_3

Lilmissmup, hope you start to feel better soon, I agree the being friends thing is pants, I once spent about a year crying myself to sleep every night over someone who wasn't worth it:mad:

The only advice I can give you is to keep away from him totally, it's like a drug and if you keep getting tiny bits of it, it will take so much longer to get over him. Onwards and upwards! I know it's hard but you have to think of yourself, one day you will look back and wonder what you ever saw in him. :rolleyes:

We have all done the texting and then regretting it, don't beat yourself up, it's completely normal, I used to have to give my flatmate my phone to prevent me doing any drunk/angry texting.:o