Opinions plz before i phone uni....security guard at uni walking into DD room !

littlemissmoney

supermoneysaving2008 wrote: »

I would be scared to wake up with a strange guy in my room, and then once its happened ,i would feel constantly like i had no privacy, as it could happen anytime again. A private shared house might be better.

She didn't wake up with a strange man in her room!! She woke up to the hall porter (a university employee) knocking on the door, calling out who he was, he didn't get any reply so he unlocked the door with his key and put a cable in the room. Anyone would think a stranger climbed through her window at 2am the way you lot are going on!

Why didn't she call out when he said who he was?

If I was her I would be over the moon to see the bloke so I could finally get on the internet!

worriedsik

oystercatcher wrote: »

If OP is so fussed about her daughters privacy maybe she should rent or buy her her own flat rather than leave her in communal accomodation which, lets face it, is just one step above boarding school or a hotel.
She is expecting far too much!
It's not like the guy let himself into the bathroom !

It was my daughter that was upset about it , i was asking for advice
i dont think it is allowed on there first year to have there own place
I dont think it should matter i think they are entitled to some privacy thats my opinion obv not yours , i could not afford her to have her own place so i guess then she will maybe have to put up and shut up eh

worriedsik

littlemissmoney wrote: »

She didn't wake up with a strange man in her room!! She woke up to the hall porter (a university employee) knocking on the door, calling out who he was, he didn't get any reply so he unlocked the door with his key and put a cable in the room. Anyone would think he climbed through her window at 2am the way you lot are going on!

Why didn't she call out when he said who he was?

If I was her I would be over the moon to see the bloke so I could finally get on the internet!

actually you are wrong but iam not going to argue with you

morg_monster

i think some people are being a bit harsh to the OP, she's already said she will encourage her daughter to sort it out herself and acknowledged its probably best the she doesn't ring the uni herself.

it's clear the girl is in her very first few days at uni, first time living away from home, I think its only natural for mums and dads to be a bit overprotective during this phase! OP has come on and asked for advice, and has taken it on board, which is more than you can say for plenty of posters on here!

worriedsik

littlemissmoney wrote: »

Did he actually walk into her room? Or did he just open the door and throw a cable in? Did he even notice your daughter was in bed?

he banged the door opened it and then shouted security as he walked in

she was surprised and shocked she has only been there a few wks

she is sorting it out now on her own thanks for all your help

littlemissmoney

I'm surprised the students have gone a few weeks without internet access without complaining :eek::eek:

zzzLazyDaisy

Gosh! I have read through this thread and while I accept that people who know what it is like to live in halls don't think there is anything wrong with a man going into a young woman's bedroom without being invited, I am surprised!

If the uni have instructed him to do that, they are putting him in a vulnerable position, what if the girl makes an allegation against him?

As for the posters who say it is no different to hotels - it is VERY different. Firstly, I ALWAYS put the (provided) 'do not disturb' sign on the door when I am likely to be in a state of undress in the room, and secondly on the odd occasion when I have forgotten, the maid has knocked and called something like 'housekeeping' from outside, and then just opened the door a crack and called again.

I can honestly say that I have never had a male hotel employee walk into my room without my express permission - and if it did happen I'd complain.

But this isn't a hotel, it is her home and her bedroom.

As I say, I am willing to accept that people know what they are talking about when they shrug and say it is acceptable. But I am surprised. It wouldn't be acceptable to me.

worriedsik

morg_monster wrote: »

i think some people are being a bit harsh to the OP, she's already said she will encourage her daughter to sort it out herself and acknowledged its probably best the she doesn't ring the uni herself.

it's clear the girl is in her very first few days at uni, first time living away from home, I think its only natural for mums and dads to be a bit overprotective during this phase! OP has come on and asked for advice, and has taken it on board, which is more than you can say for plenty of posters on here!

Thank you very much i was begining to feel like an idiot for worrying about my daughter being upset , you have said it better than i could

I have had some very good replies ie the door stopper link that somebody kindly gave me which would be good as it has an alarm on too so she would not be trapped if emergency

My daughter is a very sensible girl she is not street wise and sometimes i wished i had made her tougher she is sensative and i would rather she was this way than being a loud mouth who has no respect for anybody

I know she will have trouble telling the security guard because she really does not like to cause any trouble
it upset her and she was sounding off about it to me so i have given her some advise from which i got on here & i thank those ppl for that.

Yes she is an adult but an adult with no life experiances yet and iam sure she will learn as she goes.

Thanks

worriedsik

zzzLazyDaisy wrote: »

Gosh! I have read through this thread and while I accept that people who know what it is like to live in halls don't think there is anything wrong with a man going into a young woman's bedroom without being invited, I am surprised!

If the uni have instructed him to do that, they are putting him in a vulnerable position, what if the girl makes an allegation against him?

As for the posters who say it is no different to hotels - it is VERY different. Firstly, I ALWAYS put the (provided) 'do not disturb' sign on the door when I am likely to be in a state of undress in the room, and secondly on the odd occasion when I have forgotten, the maid has knocked and called something like 'housekeeping' from outside, and then just opened the door a crack and called again.

I can honestly say that I have never had a male hotel employee walk into my room without my express permission - and if it did happen I'd complain.

But this isn't a hotel, it is her home and her bedroom.

As I say, I am willing to accept that people know what they are talking about when they shrug and say it is acceptable. But I am surprised. It wouldn't be acceptable to me.

Thanks

i guess everybody has diff ideas on whats acceptable it wouldnt be to me either and she is only just turned 18

worriedsik

littlemissmoney wrote: »

I'm surprised the students have gone a few weeks without internet access without complaining :eek::eek:

They havent gone without internet access , they had wireless and were changing it over to some cable conection