The advantages of being single

Katie-Kat-Kins

Whilst I'm a newly wed who wouldn't trade my lovely DH for single life I can think of a few advantages:
1. No need to compromise on what to eat for meals
2. No need to compromise on what to watch on telly or whether to watch it
3. No need to compromise on holidays (loads of couples have one who likes a relaxing sunworshipping beach holiday and one who's a culture vulture/adrenaline junkie).
4. Able to go to bed/come home at whatever time you like without worrying about waking/keeping awake the other or being woken.
5. Nobody to hog the duvet/kick you in bed/snore/talk in their sleep/fart etc.
6. Long baths/showers with no one hurrying you up because they need the loo.
7. Being as tidy/untidy as you like and not affecting anyone else.
8. No one to put your nice white undies in the wash with their jeans resulting in grey undies........
9. No compromising on pets
10. Income is solely yours to do with as you wish.
11. No need to compare diaries before agreeing to a social occasion
12. Freedom to choose what you do on the weekend, whether it is staying in bed or going shopping.
13. Socialising with other men without worrying how it looks, whether it is appropriate etc
14. No agonising over where to spend christmas, and other significant family events.
15. No awkward man presents to buy at christmas apart from your dad!
16. Going out with the mate that your OH finds irritating without having to explain/justify/negotiate.
17. Being able to up and move without considering someone elses career/family ties.



Ok I can't quite think of a full 20, but I think there's a bit to be going on with there.

Having said that I'm happy to accept all those things in return for all the wonderful things that my DH brings to our relationship.

Glen0000

londoner1998 wrote: »

Am I really an exception? Or did I work very hard at myself and my self-steem?? He is my n.1 supporter and I try and give him as much love and support as I can, because he is worth it! We even go as far as being able to him watch football on telly with the headphones on while I do yoga in the same room...civilised or what?:Dn

I really hope you are not the exception. I am certainly baffled by some of these lists. Maybe that is why the divorce rate is too high as some people are simply too difficult to get along with and people think that "lust" or "love" will solve it all and dont really realise that the rest of your life is a LONG time.

People being "controlled" seems to be a huge part if some of these lists.

londoner1998

January20 wrote: »

I have been single since I split up from my then husband in early 2000. I have never looked back.

Advantages?

1. Not having to compromise over anything.
2. Being in control of my finances. I spend or I save. I choose.
3. Being able to see my friends whenever I like for however long I like.
4. Going to bed at any time I want without having to explain myself.
6. Being able to spoil the cat or talk to the cat as much as I want. (the cat doesn't like football )
7. Not having to put up with sport on the tv.
8. Not being criticised on the odd occasion that I decide to watch "Murder she wrote" .
9. Not having to put up with a man snoring next to me (especially after a heavy session at the pub).
10. Spending as much time as I want on the computer.
11. Shopping as much or as little as I want.
12. Going to to cinema whenever I want, and on my own if I want without being questioned about it.
13. Eating what I want, when I want.
14. Dressing for myself - no raised eye brows or expectations.
15. Listening to the music I like without comment.
16. My self-esteem not being trampled.
17. Not having to put up with male habits like farting, burping etc.
18. Being able to bring my daughter up the way I wanted (ie with the values I believe in).
19. Not having to force myself to have sex when I'm exhausted after a long day at work because he'll be too immature and needy to understand and feel rejected and make me feel bad.
20. Spending as much time as I need on work stuff - ie preparing lessons and correcting work - without anybody needing me.

Do I need to stop at 20?

Sorry, but are you sure you are in the right relationship? What strikes me most is item n.1 in the list. Do you really want to be in a relationship? Becasue life and particularly relationships of any kind are about compromising... may be not the point of the thread but I can not belive that being with somebody can be seen as such a bore. n. 19 is worrying- forcing yourself to have sex??? :eek:

ps- Sorry, I re-read your post and realised you split up from your partner in the realtionship you describe... nos surprise if things were so bad, but I promise you that it doesn't have to be like that!! :rotfl:

newcook

I love being single and living alone –
I can come and go as I please,
watch whatever I want on the telly without someone moaning,
cook what I want for tea and have it whenever I want,
no stinky socks in the washing,
no queues for the bathroom,
when I tidy up I can go out knowing it will still be tidy when I get back,
if I buy myself a treat I know it will be there until I have it,
I can slum it all day in my pj's if I feel like it without being moaned at

Butterfliesarepretty

I have been single since 2001, had one two year relationship and finished it because he was jealous of me and moaned when i wanted to spend two nights alone at my own house. Rarely introduced me to people as his girlfriend. In the end I realised that him being 15 years older than me and his wife had left him meant he could not trust women at all.

advantages of being single are, staying slim because you are in control of your food shopping.
planning your own day to how you want it.
You only have yourself to clean up after.
Go to bed when you wish.
Relax when you want to.
Read a book and not get interrupted.
Keeping your hobbies and your interests active.


yet I miss the company of nice man.;)

Pssst

shawtj2 wrote: »

I have been single since 2001, had one two year relationship and finished it because he was jealous of me and moaned when i wanted to spend two nights alone at my own house. Rarely introduced me to people as his girlfriend. In the end I realised that him being 15 years older than me and his wife had left him meant he could not trust women at all.

advantages of being single are, staying slim because you are in control of your food shopping.
planning your own day to how you want it.
You only have yourself to clean up after.
Go to bed when you wish.
Relax when you want to.
Read a book and not get interrupted.
Keeping your hobbies and your interests active.


yet I miss the company of nice man.;)

But then a nice man would appreciate that you are also an individual and need to grow and do your own thing as well as contribute to the coupledom bit.

Unfortunately too many relationships become a self destructive exercise in control and ownership which is sad.

Surely if you really loved and cared for someone,you would want them to enjoy their own pursuits,to do their own thing and to enjoy life?

Butterfliesarepretty

:rotfl:I keep getting things said to me like 'how can you not get a boyfriend - you have a wonderful personality and are very pretty and independent and have your own interests'.

It would be nice to meet someone down to earth, has their own interests, is confident and a barrel of laughs. I have a daughter and even like men who have kids too.

Im only 42 and sometimes feel I will be single for a long long time.;)

Rummer

Much as I adore my OH there are a few things I miss!

• Things being where you left them
• No mess
• Girly decor throughout the house
• I would own a dog and a horse
• Juice left in the fridge
• Less laundry

Sounds quite daft when you see it in print but it's the little things I miss :rotfl:

Always

Debt_Free_Chick wrote: »

Not what you want, but you can't be happy with someone else unless you are happy with/by yourself.

No-one else is responsible for your happiness

:T

Which is what I've just told my OH this week and also that I've had enough. Honestly he's become the most miserable person I've ever met over the last year, to the point where even if I bought him biscuits (for example) there'd be something wrong with them... anyway so I agree entirely, but apparantly he can't be happy without me (and I know he can't be happy with me because I've tried everything!) so he's stuck.

Me however, I'm responsible for my own happiness and would rather be happy by myself than miserable with company

PS An even better example of his misery - got up early with the kids on his birthday, put presents on the table, a cake, some candles, few balloons, etc and he admitted all he thought when he came down was that everything looked messy! - and he can't understand why I'm seriously reconsidering our relationship!

Butterfliesarepretty

Believe me i do hunt.
I used to be on dating sites but come off them now as found too many time wasters.
I go out on the town sometimes and I get out and about a lot.