The advantages of being single

Glen0000

January20 wrote: »

Thankfully, my friends seem to have got the message and stopped hinting about me getting into a relationship. My life is just as successful and meaningful eventhough I am single.

If I ever spilt up with my wife I would be in no hurry to enter into another relationship. If it is not loving and respectful and a good laugh 90% of the time it is not worth the hastle.

I would rather be on my own than in a bad relationship.

January20

Glen0000 wrote: »

If I ever spilt up with my wife I would be in no hurry to enter into another relationship. If it is not loving and respectful and a good laugh 90% of the time it is not worth the hastle.

I would rather be on my own than in a bad relationship.

Exactly the way I feel!

JoW123

From someone who has been single only a matter of days:-

The thought that I won't be lied to on a daily basis. No-one has the right to erode someone else's self esteem, especially a partner. Having said that I personally dont believe that being single is better than being in a realtionship with a loving supportive partner, but that's just me!

never_enough

I can't say I felt there were any advantages to being single. I love being in a relationship & I loved being single. Being in a relationship really doesn't stop me doing anything I want to do or make me do anything that I don't want to (except the in-law thing a couple of times a year I guess )
Depends on your relationship I guess, I think that my oh is totally amazing (but he thinks that I am too! ) Your friend sounds like she could do with some self esteem boosting sessions.

mummy_Jay

The advantages I find of being single
1. no one gets jealous or sulks cos i spent too much time with my DS
2. when i'm ill, as soon as ds is in bed. I don't have to put up with anyone kicking up a stink or feeling like i need to stay up for them, i can just go to bed without hassle.
3. No one telling me what i do wrong or putting me down or moanings at me
4. when i go out i don't have to feel guilty if i go off and have fun with my mates, I'm not made to feel like I'm suppost to stay put
5. I don't have to watch sport on tv, ever.
6. No one gets jealous if i flirt or smile at cute blokes
7. I get to love my shape and eat what i want without digs or comments on how i dress
8. I get to me 100% and love it without being made to feel I need/should compromise
9. I can watch as many period dramas and horror films as i like without being moaned at (ok so this is just watch what i want on tv but these too favs imparticular always seem to get on blokes nerves)
10. No one to annoy me by sitting on their bum whilst I run about getting everything done (cleaning, cooking, DIY, gardening etc)
11. I don't have to wait or ask if i want to do stuff, i can just do it
12. I get all the bed to myself, no one snoring or stealing covers or waking me in the night. So I get a good nights sleep every night.
13. My money is mine and i can chose what its spent on
14. If things go wrong, there is no blame. I can just get on and sort it, without the hassle.
15. I am the only influence on my DS at home, so I don't ever worry about is this a negative influence on him (I'm not sure I've worded it right, but i cringe when guys make comments in front of kids about women should do this and not that or pink is a girls colour not for boys, is just nice not to have this at home)

I do miss having a man to hug etc but can I have a weekend BF or once a month one. I like my independance and I don't think I could cope with a man 24/7.

barnaby-bear

Glen0000 wrote: »

No, I have never even met most of my wives friends OH, unless we bump into them at Tesco. We are married, not joined at the hip.

You've made lots of judgmeents on what's "unhealthy" in a relationship and tbh have a bit of a sense of humour bypass.... but I find it a bit odd that you and your wife socialise independently and a bit strange you don't know your wife's friends or their partners.... :rolleyes:

Zazen999

barnaby-bear wrote: »

You've made lots of judgmeents on what's "unhealthy" in a relationship and tbh have a bit of a sense of humour bypass.... but I find it a bit odd that you and your wife socialise independently and a bit strange you don't know your wife's friends or their partners.... :rolleyes:

He didn't say he didn't know his wife's friends....just his wife's friends' partners.

I have never even met most of my wives friends OH

Glen0000

barnaby-bear wrote: »

You've made lots of judgmeents on what's "unhealthy" in a relationship and tbh have a bit of a sense of humour bypass.... but I find it a bit odd that you and your wife socialise independently and a bit strange you don't know your wife's friends or their partners.... :rolleyes:

We have a child so she goes out with her mates, I go out with mine and the other babysits. What is strange about that? She doesnt like playing PS3 all night and drinking beer and I don't like clothes and make up shopping and gossiping over red wine. A good half of our friends dont even have partners.

On the very rare occasion , maybe 4 time a year, we get a night alone we spend it together.

Hermia

For me the biggest advantage is being able to live my life exactly as I want. I'm fairly unconventional and just find it too much hassle to try and compromise to the degree needed to live with someone. Even my most loved-up friends admit I'm probably too eccentric to be in a conventional relationship.

I also like not being a housewife. I am sure there are lots of couples out there who have totally equally relationships where housework and childcare is concerned. Unfortunately I have many friends who work longer hours than their husband and then come home and have to do the majority of the housework.

I do think some people are just not made for the conventional life. I have had some lovely boyfriends, but have always preferred being single. I know plenty of middle-aged and elderly singletons who have always liked being single.

I definitely think having the duvet to yourself is a big advantage too!

londoner1998

January20 wrote: »

I have been single since I split up from my then husband in early 2000. I have never looked back.

Advantages?

1. Not having to compromise over anything.
2. Being in control of my finances. I spend or I save. I choose.
3. Being able to see my friends whenever I like for however long I like.
4. Going to bed at any time I want without having to explain myself.
5. Not having the toilet seat up.
6. Being able to spoil the cat or talk to the cat as much as I want. (the cat doesn't like football )
7. Not having to put up with sport on the tv.
8. Not being criticised on the odd occasion that I decide to watch "Murder she wrote" .
9. Not having to put up with a man snoring next to me (especially after a heavy session at the pub).
10. Spending as much time as I want on the computer.
11. Shopping as much or as little as I want.
12. Going to to cinema whenever I want, and on my own if I want without being questioned about it.
13. Eating what I want, when I want.
14. Dressing for myself - no raised eye brows or expectations.
15. Listening to the music I like without comment.
16. My self-esteem not being trampled.
17. Not having to put up with male habits like farting, burping etc.
18. Being able to bring my daughter up the way I wanted (ie with the values I believe in).
19. Not having to force myself to have sex when I'm exhausted after a long day at work because he'll be too immature and needy to understand and feel rejected and make me feel bad.
20. Spending as much time as I need on work stuff - ie preparing lessons and correcting work - without anybody needing me.

Do I need to stop at 20?

As much as I can see the point of all of the above, I must be the luckiest person alive, because I don't have a problem with any of those things and my OH and I rub along nicely in all those areas... ok, not always easy, but it doesn't even enter the equation that I (or him) wouldn't spend our own money however we see fit and can't dedicate whatever amount of time we need to work (basics in our jointly rented flat covered, of course).:cool:

Am I really an exception? Or did I work very hard at myself and my self-steem?? He is my n.1 supporter and I try and give him as much love and support as I can, because he is worth it! We even go as far as being able to him watch football on telly with the headphones on while I do yoga in the same room...civilised or what?:D
The only think I would say is really is a blessing for single people is not having to deal with the OH's ex (if they have children).. grrr... now that is one I need to constatly work on:eek: