My husband has really annoyed me

kindofagilr

Hmm your mam isnt helping matters really

Ok no afterschool clubs, can you hire a childminder to get kids from school on friday till you finish work

I'll be dammed if you don't take this great job offer just because of a petty husband

The_Banker_5

Tell him you want a divorce.

alwaysworried_2

Once again thank you for all the replies.

I really do think its a status thing so that everyone thinks "oh hes got money cos his wife doesnt need to work".

He keeps saying im working for hardly anything, cos im only really getting an extra £200 a month because of the tax credits will get taken off us, but as ive said they will get taken off us anyway because of this temporary promotion hes got (and tonight he has said he doesnt know how long it will last for, it could last well into the next year depending on how he well he does).

ive tried to tell him if im working, we can (if we wanted to ) spend my wages, spend his wages, AND spend the extra money he is earning, whereas if I dont work, we can only spend his wages inc the extra hes getting BUT we have to keep the tax credits by because they will need to be paid back or, we spend is normal wage, along with the tax credits AND save the extra money he is earning to pay back to the tax credits so technically he would be taking on this promotion and earning the extra money for nothing!!!!!!!

alwaysworried_2

The_Banker wrote: »

Tell him you want a divorce.

Im getting close to that stage

The_Banker_5

alwaysworried wrote: »

Im getting close to that stage

Like you say. If he has been working overtime then your tax credits should be less anyway.

It sounds like he might be worried in case he has to do some housework. Sorry if this has already been mentioned , just I havnt read all the thread.

BitterAndTwisted

An extra £2400 a year is not to be sniffed at in the current economic climate, No-one's job is secure at the moment and I doubt his is completely bomb-proof either.

Keeping_Motivated

alwaysworried wrote: »

Im getting close to that stage

All the more important that you take this job then as it will help you to stay independent. Maybe you being independent is what is threatening/worrying him?

RedBern

Money_maker wrote: »

Err, what a FO pot or is it rude?

A stash of money held back should one wish to F off at any time - enabling one to have the financial means so to do.;)

gizmo111

See if you can find a childmainder, check out the tax credit element of the childcare, pay for it out of your wages and let him stew in his own juice. How old are the children?
If you are happy the kids will be happy, and should things go pearshape then you will have a work history to build upon.
If his only objection is the prestige in telling his freinds his wife doesn't need to work then he needs to change his freinds, although I as others suspect this is his way of controlling you. When you feel like it then think about losing the weight, not for him but for your health and other benefits.
Anyways loads and loads of great ideas here for healthy packed lunches to take to work.:j
Take Care and don't let him grind you down. x

bunny999

Floss wrote: »

Putting doubt into the OP's mind isn't fair......she has to trust him & believe what he says to give the relationship a fair chance.

He has given her every reason not to trust him. Once someone has been unfaithful you can never trust them and by staying with him she has let him know he can get away with it. The OP has said she is unhappy and the husband sounds nasty and selfish. I think she should take the job and dump the husband.