I am fed up with doing all of the cleaning cooking and washing...

princess_loki

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

I agree with everything else you said but I do think that was unnecessarily harsh: the OP posted at nearly 10pm last night, a long time after visiting hours at most hospitals ends fro the day.

I agree totally with the suggestion that now is exactly the right time to be increasing rents and employing a cleaner as well as giving the lodger a schedule for a share of the chores.

thank you - yes i had already spent the day at work, gone to the vets, made oh food and visited him. then i phoned his mum and his childrens mum. i gave the cat medication, cleaned the kitchen and three litter trays. then it was nearly 10pm and i couldn't even be bothered to make myself food. so i sat down had a large glass of wine and then went to bed.

not only is all this going on but i am having to apply for jobs at the moment too because my temp assignment ends next week and they are not sure if they will have any work for me. i so need a holiday but now that oh is in hospital i can't even look forward to anything like that.

sorry i am so grumpy and low at the moment

BitterAndTwisted

princess_loki wrote: »

sorry i am so grumpy and low at the moment

Darling, absolutely no apology is required: you've got an awful lot on your plate right now.

strawberries1

:grouphug: :grouphug:

princess_loki wrote: »

sorry i am so grumpy and low at the moment

One Big long group hug for you Princess Loki!! :grouphug: :grouphug:

skintstudentnurse

princess_loki wrote: »

anything would be good - they really don't care - just go upstairs into bedrooms and play playstation..

then i get berated at 9pm if i have not done dinner..

Seriously? Get a back bone and tell them to s0d off! I once had a boyfriend like your OH, binned him long ago, why should you do all the cleaning AND cooking? Are they mummys boys who have always had everything done for them or are they just plain taking advantage of you?

BitterAndTwisted

Sounds like they're both bone idle plus they have much, much lower standards than the OP. As long as the long-suffering one in this scenario keeps cleaning up after them with no consequences they'll keep sitting on their a***s on the Playstation.

skintstudentnurse

Oops just read your other post, sorry to hear about OHs stroke.

barnaby-bear

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

Once you've finished sipping that nice half pint of wine start making a list of chores for the lodger to get started on over the weekend while you spend time with your OH at the hospital. I do hope he's going to be OK

I think this is a really good idea. "Look Ant seeing Dec is in hospital and I'm running around like a blue-arsed fly and have much more on my plate, with looking for work, hospital visiting and doing everything that Dec did, I don't have the time to do the stuff I've been doing for you - do you want to do this list of chores or would you prefer to pay £40 a week extra rent to cover a cleaner?"

Mojisola

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

I agree with everything else you said but I do think that was unnecessarily harsh: the OP posted at nearly 10pm last night, a long time after visiting hours at most hospitals ends fro the day.

Sorry if that came over harshly. I've found in the past that what you really want to do can be made clear by situations like this. When you're up to your neck in coping with everyday chores you can't always see the wood for the trees. Sometimes when the situation is shaken up, you can see things more clearly.

I'm sure the OP won't abandon her OH in his hour of need in hospital but I don't think either the OH or the lodger deserve her.

princess_loki

hello once again!

oh is home from hospital and still not 100% but can make sarnies / cup of tea etc ..

in the meantime i have cleaned the whole house and cleared all of my paperwork / personal stuff from communal areas!! it looks lovely now and i was thinking of putting up the following notice - just wondered what everyone else thought before i actually do...

Cleaning the house

Ok – let’s make this easy... for the kitchen and house the cleaning stuff is located in the cupboard under the sink – the cleaning stuff is what I buy so do not complain if it is not what you would like to use...

Basic cleaning stuff for the bathroom is in the bathroom!

KITCHEN
· The kitchen counter needs to be wiped whenever it is dirty even if you are just waiting for the kettle to boil or are just washing up.

· The kitchen counter needs to be wiped before preparing food as cats get up on it.

· Chopping boards and any other utensils are considered dirty if they are left on a kitchen work surface.

· Anything left on the draining board / counters must be considered dirty as both cats get up there.

· Microwave needs to be cleaned once it has been used five times – that means that each person in the house wipes out the microwave, plate and underneath it at least once a week.

· If when washing up you notice that the cat bowls are dirty please either wash or put in dishwasher – please also change water bowls if you notice they are low.

· The hob is dirty if there are any splashes on it ..

· Most of the pans, cutlery, plates and other things in the kitchen belong to me. Leaving them in the kitchen sink for ONE day is ok – any longer is NOT acceptable.

· HOWEVER... placing dirty things in the dishwasher IS FINE.

BATHROOM
Cleaning stuff for the bathroom is located in the bathroom – various sprays, blue sponge and loo brush next to the toilet.
· The sink is considered dirty when there are white marks on it – all that is required is a quick spray of cleaning liquid on to a sponge to wipe round and a quick rinse.

· The bathroom cabinet is dirty when it has toothpaste spots on the mirror and beard shavings on the bottom ledge.

· The bath/shower is dirty after one week of using it.

· The tiles around the shower are dirty when they go dull and there is orange in the grout.

KITCHEN BIN
Believe it or not it is NOT just me that uses the bin – empty it BEFORE it is full. If it has stinky water or stuff in the bottom of it then wash it out with bleach or disinfectant.


RECYCLING
The list for what bin goes out when is above the light switch in the under stairs cupboard.

GLASS – can be placed on the old coffee table by the shed
PAPER/ CARDBOARD – can be placed with the rest of it outside
CANS – bin is outside – and I would hope that ANY cans are put out daily rather than monthy as otherwise cans left out create bacteria and a nasty smell.
FRESH VEGETABLE / SALAD WASTE – can be disposed in the compost bin located behind the shed – or if it is raining or nasty out it could be put in some newspaper or one of the plastic trays from the veg and be disposed of in the morning...

I will take responsibility for cat litter trays ,hovering and dusting weekly, descaling the kettle and cleaning the toaster, cleaning windows, cleaning out drains, cleaning the washing machine and dishwasher filters, defrosting and cleaning fridges/freezers and cleaning the oven, ensuring that we have loo rolls, washing up sponges and cloths – AS LONG AS EVERYONE ELSE HELPS!

I am not asking you guys to clean for ENGLAND! I just want everyone to do a little bit so that I don’t spend all of my free time having to do it all..

Is that too much to ask???????

BitterAndTwisted

I'm sure it was immensely satisfying the write that all down but I can guarantee you that your two companions will not read it. They'll have switched off after the second sentence, I'd stake my life on it.

Just formulate a rota, putting it in black and white up in the kitchen about who is doing what and when. How they achieve their share is up to them.

Have you put their rent up yet and why haven't you engaged a cleaner? I have a feeling you'll have to eventually, so why don't you just save yourself all the aggro and do it now?