£77,366.35 reasons to be debt free!

Nelmer

In_my_dreams wrote: »

Got xmas lists of kids today, Madam wants a laptop, phone or flatscreen TV :eek::eek::eek::eek: she's 9:eek::eek::eek::eek: and has had a very stern talking to about high expectations. Little boy wants three piece of lego however he would liked them wrapped individually......

Best go and feed dogs now, the youngest is sat on my toes with his bowl in his mouth, just a small hint I think?

IMD - this made me chuckle! Your little boy sounds priceless
18 yr old stepDD would like nail varnish and itunes voucher
15 yr old stepDS would like a laptop and xbox games (you know the £45 new ones!)
2 springer spaniels would like a new squeeky toy each as the squeeks have gone in the ones they've got and they make a sad sound to go with their sad faces :rotfl:

Some people are just easier to please!

In_my_dreams

New day, make up and hair done - mask of "pretend everything's ok" is plastered on

Been reassessing finances in my head, I am due £120 from quidco this month which might help out A LOT! Also there are two DD's due to come out the day after we are paid so they don't really need to be counted and I ought to stop stressing as it means that I will be £376 better off than I thought, which is the money I transferred from savings, so actually it is still there :j

Aiming for a NSD today:cool:

In_my_dreams

At work, it seems ok so far. Working hard and just see how the day goes. Ruined my NSD as I needed chewing gum but I thought better that than lose clients due to garlic breath?

rupe34

Hey IMD - you are doing so brilliantly - and I am with you on the chewing gum!

BTW just wanted to say - found my GP incredibly helpful when I had my own stuff to deal with (and discovered I have a hormonal imbalance which actually needs to be treated with pills:cool:) - so IF you feel you need to go - don't be TOO strong OK?!;)

As for the Christmas presents...:rotfl:Madam is a girl after my own heart!!!

Jo_R_2

You seem to be a little bit better today... Although I know the feeling of putting on the 'mask'. Thing is about that is that sometimes if you work hard enough you can 'think' yourself into a more positive frame of mind just by pretending iykwim?

Sometimes I do it - if I have one of those days that starts horrendously and I dread getting anything done, then I take a deep breath and fake confidence. It tends to work on the whole, it doesn't make things miraculously better but does turn things around, I can see what I AM managing instead of what I am not.

Think of things like that: like someone said, even if you're not going forward, you're not actually going backwards are you? The money situation is being dealt with, yes it's not ideal with an OH who is not completely involved but it's manageable. Does he appreciate the situation? My OH used to think I was spoiling his fun too:rolleyes: Once we worked out he could still do stuff he wanted to but on a scaled-down level, he was happy (or happier anyway!) He understands, but finds it hard at times. He still won't pool our finances completely, which to a point is fine with me as the debts are mine but it would help in terms of saving for joint things if he would let me "direct" him a bit more - oh you know what I mean:D

As for work... I haven't been in such a situation but keeping notes as suggested is good. Have you pursued appropriate avenues (sorry can't remember all the finer points)? I hate that you think leaving is the answer, is there anything else you can do?

Turia

Hi IMD,
am really sorry that work situation is so horrid, havent been on for a few days so have just got up to speed. Like most have already advised keep a very detailed diary of everything said, discussed, and any actions taken.. Wishing you all the best and virtual hugs and well wishes coming your way.

In the meantime - coming back to the OH dilemma - I have no idea if this will help but it seems Mine is infinitely WORSE than yours Think Ostrich!!!
(hope that put a small smile on your face)

with regards to me setting up my own diary I dont even know if i am disciplined enough to do that!! will definitely give it some thought and see if I can try to set something up!!!

POSITIVE_AND_FOCUSED

Hi IMD
I hope you dont mind, but just want to give you the following "poem". I have this to the side of my desk. I probably read it more than anything else and hold on to all that is positive in life. Not that I always succeed, however, my thoughts are with you at what is a stressful time for you. Hang in there..

Every goal that has ever been reached began with just one step - and thebelief that it could be attained.
Dreams really can come true but they are often the result of hard work, determination and persistence.
When the end of the journey seems impossible to reach, rmember that all you need to do is take one more step. Stay focused on your goal and remember.. each small step will bring you a little closer.
When the road becomes hard to travel and it feels as if you'll never reach the end.. look deep inside your heart and you will find strength you never knew you had.
Believe in yourself, and remember that so many others believe in you too.

Take care IMD

savingholmes

I agree with Positive

I like the fact that both of you like me picked a positive username - to reflect what I wanted to achieve ie save ourselves and like the play on words too.... With a user name like in my dreams - if you can start to believe that you debt free dream and positive work place can become reality then that can only help

Like my strap line - this journey - requires action one step at a time, one day at a time. You can make it. I don't read much about you socialising with friends - have you looked at whether you have balanced things there. It does help us women if we can see at least one friend on a regular basis..... Good luck

In_my_dreams

Thanks for all the inspirational posts -

Rupe - I am considering the Dr, however I was hormonal at the weekend and I wonder if I would have coped better had I been "normal". Am going to see how I am over the next few weeks.

Jo - I definitely had the mask on and it did make me feel better as I was determined not to let it slip. I AM moving the money situation forwards, I suppose I just want it done now! OH most definitely doesn't appreciate the money situation, only this morning he told me he was going on a shopping spree for clothes :eek::eek::eek: I live in hope that he will get there with me one day...

Turia - someone worse than mine, I must meet him

Positive - thank you so much, I've printed off the poem and put it in my purse. If I'm not positive then I'll never get through this!

SH - never thought that my username was positive but I suppose it is. In my dreams I would be debt free, mortgage free and happy with my family....and I guess I can get there. The reason I don't mention my social life on here is that I'm scared stiff someone will recognise me. In my real world I am a social butterfly provided it is free or cheap and we entertain a lot, i.e. bring a dish. One friend knows of the debt but too embarrassed to tell anyone else. I am also in a running club and have some really good friends there. Maybe I should "release" some of my more day to day stuff, just don't want to be "exposed"

An update on my situation, the said offender has acknowledged to someone else the inappropriate behaviour but is still ignoring me, which I can cope with if I know that it has been acknowledged and there is no blame laid at my door. Feeling less nauseous when I sit there now so I guess that's progress?

Car still in garage and scared of the phonecall telling me how much it will cost :eek: OH is on about buying a new car, *sigh* I will let him dream a little longer....

savingholmes

Hi IMD - how frustrating about your OH and the situation at work! What will it take for him to face up there is a problem? Can you take his cards away from him?