Please help a new mum - baby will not sleep!

WestonDave

There are a lot of potential approaches - sucking is a big way a baby gets comfort so the fact that she appears to be feeding may not be a sign of hunger - it disrupts pain symptoms I think so it may be a sign of discomfort, maybe colic type things if its around a poo etc.

We found the baby whisperer book very helpful - it gives you some routines to try but they are based on understanding what various cries and body language means and acting on it, rather than the regimented routines of other books. If nothing else knowing that a certain cry is pain and another is hunger is very helpful and we would have paid for the book for that info alone!

Swaddling I think is also now out of vogue again but we found it very useful with our two as the confined feeling seemed to make them feel secure and help them off to sleep. There is also a learning process at some stage where they have to learn to get themselves off to sleep so that when they come into light sleep they can settle back for more sleep rather than screeching for you! Unfortunately as our youngest is two this stuff is rapidly being wiped from the "useful information to remember" part of my brain!

BitterAndTwisted

skintchick wrote: »

She will eventually sleep in our arms, or on my chest, but this is rubbish and not sustainable long term. She will also go to sleep in the sling but again, I cannot walk around for two or three hours at a time just to get her to sleep!

If baby will sleep like this, then I'd be tempted to carry on with it. Then once baby is asleep, pop her into her crib. She'll get the hang of it eventually. Remember, baby has been used to hearing another heartbeat pretty much since conception.

I am exhausted, OH goes back to work on Wednesday, I have a history of depression and I am terrified of being on my own with her - I don't know how to cope because she just eats or cries the whole time.

Of course your exhausted, you're a brand-new Mum! Please don't be afraid: nothing bad will happen except a bit (or a lot) of crying. Fear of fear is worse than actually having to deal with what's making you anxious. Trust yourself.

She is nearly 4 weeks old. All we want is to be able to get her to sleep on her own in her crib which attaches to our bed. Is that so much to ask?

Of course it isn't too much to ask but no tiny baby ever responded to reason, unfortunately. There's a reason baby is distressed but getting to the bottom of it is easier said than done.

Also, this thread is useless without a photo of said darling bairn.

skintchick

kerry13238 wrote: »

have you thought about collic my daughter used to cry all night every night unless i was feeding her then she would sleep but as soon as she stoped ten min after the crying started again. i went to the doctors and she was perscribed gavascon infant it helped loads. i also breast fed and found it really hard to eat much as so many foods made her colic worse no onion,everything had to be completely plain that i ate kfc was absolute nightmare i had it once and she was in pain all night. the only thing that would stop her crying was to feed her i suppose hunger pains were getting confused with wind

It's not colic - we know when she has wind and this is just different, it's unsettled, overtired, crying.

Glamazon

skinty - no advice but big hugs from me and my own bean :grouphug:

skintchick

Weston Dave and Bitter and Twisted - we have that book but it says to settle her with a cuddle then put her down but she doesn;t settle!

If she falls asleep on me, and i then move her to her crib, she wakes up and cries. We are at a loss really.

smartie12

Just a quick thought.... dummy.

Would you consider one??? Some people think they're not great but they can be a lifesaver.

WestonDave

Does she sleep better in the daytime - our youngest became nocturnal for a while and we had to "force" his day and night to switch back to ours.

kerry13238

why dont you try the 10 steps. feed her change then put down leave her for 1 min then go back in comfort her but dont pick her up then go back out do the same for 2min and so on i did it with my son it reasured him but also let him know that that was were he should be and it was night time its hard to do but it worked with my son i had been sleeping in his cot till i tried that.

skintchick

smartie12 wrote: »

Just a quick thought.... dummy.

Would you consider one??? Some people think they're not great but they can be a lifesaver.

Tried one, but she didn;t like it cos of the shape, Waiting for the cherry dummies to arrive so we can try them.

I was against them but to be honest will try anything now except Cry It out!!

Buttonmoons

My DD was a pain to sleep when very small, we swaddled her, that worked like a treat, and she never slept in the cot until she was about 6+ months, can't remember exactly, she was a nightmare for motion, so she slept in the car seat for the first few months, as you could rock it, and sometimes the baby bouncer. It's probably not government reccomended :rolleyes: but if it gets you some sleep......