Buddiebabe's SOA / Debt Diary

gallygirl

Buddiebabe, only just seen this, so bumping it up!!!!

OK, you screwed up. Learn from it, but don't dwell on it, the damage is done.

You need to get some software installed to stop you going on these sites ever again - can anyone help - I'm sure it's on here somewhere. And also examine how you were feeling when you decided to gamble - what triggered it etc. Would it be worth contacting GA? Is there a group near you? Do they offer phone or internet support?

Don't lose sight of the fact you had not gambled for ages, so you've made excellent progress.

from me, chin up xxxx

Seaxwyn

don't feel too bad, buddie babe. You had done brilliantly well up to this point and can do again. Just look how much you have paid off.

Ali007 is right - see if you can get some help with the gambling addiction. You've been superhuman to resist it so long but it could be easier with the right support and blocking software on your computer.

Put it behind you and think about any positive changes you can make in the new year. I still think you should look for a higher paying job so you could have a bit more time to yourself.

Best of luck

Seaxwyn

buddiebabe

Thanks for your kind words. I still feel so stupid i just feel like i've let myself down and everyone else thats been giving me support on this site.

I don't have a clue what makes me want to gamble i just found myself logging onto the casino site and once id lost the first £100 i was so worried about getting it back i just kept doing it... i know i should never have done it but as you have said ali007 its been done now and theres nothing i can do about it just deal with the damage that iv done now.

I've decided that when i come home from work now im going to spend time tidying up then log onto the computer to read the posts on this site and try and post at least once a day to try and motivate myself to keep trying to pay off my debt. I have no idea how im going to do it but i'll need to come up with something!

I have loads of things in my house that i could probably sell on ebay. My only problem is that i just dont have much time. Now im not sure whether to keep listing items on ebay over the xmas period or to wait until next year and try and sell them. Any ideas???

There is no overtime at work anymore and the hours will reduce in my 2nd job after xmas so i'll need to watch every penny.

There will be an option for promotion coming up at my work in the next month or two so that may bring in a small amount of extra money, only problem is it will be the 3rd time i'll have applied for one and i don't think id be able to continue working there if i didn't get it this time.

I just don't see anyway out of the mess that im in at the moment.

Buddiebabe x

hypno06

It is a set back, not the end of the world. The main thing is to learn from this one and to remember how !!!!!! you feel because of it. Then when you ever have the temptation again, call up that horrid feeling and you will stay away from the casino!

We CAN do this.

ZTD

buddiebabe wrote:

Thanks for your kind words. I still feel so stupid i just feel like i've let myself down and everyone else thats been giving me support on this site.

I don't have a clue what makes me want to gamble i just found myself logging onto the casino site and once id lost the first £100 i was so worried about getting it back i just kept doing it...

You will have to accept that the money you have lost is gone forever. There is no "winning it back". Do you accept that? Truly?

You should buy and install this or something like it. This should keep you from gambling websites at least.

It would also be a very good idea for you to go to gambling anonymous or try to get help into understanding why you gamble.

buddiebabe wrote:

There will be an option for promotion coming up at my work in the next month or two so that may bring in a small amount of extra money, only problem is it will be the 3rd time i'll have applied for one and i don't think id be able to continue working there if i didn't get it this time.

Why not? Move when the time is right for you, and no other time.

buddiebabe wrote:

I just don't see anyway out of the mess that im in at the moment.

There is - but it will take time and persistance.

EagerLearner

Chin up BB - you have done very well to date and mistakes are made - so long as you don't do it again you can build up from this level and keep going strong.

Do as ZTD and others suggest - download that software programme if you are serious about not donating money to Gambling fat cats.

The House Always Wins - that software programme will stop the house winning and will get you paying off more debt.

Sell what you can over the next few days on e-bay - people are still looking for Xmas pressies so be selective about what you list - maybe list them as Buy It Now, or 3 day auctions, so you get quick returns.

Did you know that on your Paypal account, you can set up a payment destination apart from your bank account?

I have a savings account set up and I transfer money into there from my Paypal winnings, so I know I won't spend it and it won't get mixed up with my bank account money. Maybe you could do that too? Have a savings account to start fresh with in 2007 and make sure all your Paypal profit goes into it directly, bypassing your bank account.

Maybe you can even set up a credit card as a payment destination?

Check it out, I know the savings account works as I have set mine up, a credit card would be even better for you to directly throw money at that credit card debt from your Paypal winnings.

buddiebabe

Thank you for your replies. Am feeling a bit more positive tonight i know i've messed up and theres now no point dwelling on it. I made a mistake and i have to learn by it and ensure it does not happen again.

It will not happen again!!!!

I've phoned up the casino company and closed my account. I had closed it over the internet before and it literally took 5 mins to get it re-opened, however, when i phoned them i told them of the situation that i was in and the person on the other end of the phone told me he would close my account and also gave me details of where i would be able to get help with the problem.... i was actually quite surprised by this i thought they would try and get me to keep my account open but they didn't.

ZTD the job that im considering applying for i could do with no problems. Its just that they always end up choosing someone else that cant do the job who then comes to me to answer their questions when the don't know what to do and i really don't think i could be professional enough to help them. I have done in the past but it makes me so angry which is why i feel like it would be better for me to consider leaving rather than letting it affect me. It really got to me last time. When i didn't get the job the last time i went into a spell of depression that took me a while to get out of and i dont think i could face that again.... but its not going to happen cause im going to get the job this time. I think what i need is some positive thinking !!!! and the jobs not even been advertised yet so no need to panic at the moment :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: i really need to stop thinking about it!

I am keeping an eye out for a higher paid job that is closer to home but as yet not seen anything.... am going to keep looking there must be something out there i could do and get more money for thats legal :rotfl: :rotfl:

EagerLearner re my paypal account i didn't know that i could pay it into another account. I went in to try and set one up tonight but decided against it at the moment as i really need the money to go straight into my bank account so i can pay the other bills that are due. I think i will set this up in the new year so that maybe every alternative payment out my paypal account could go into this. It would mean that i could transfer £50 to be used in my normal account for postage and towards any other bills and then the next payment could go into savings for my credit card extra payments. I do usually try to save a %age of my Paypal money towards my credit cards.

I think 2007 is going to be my year. I cant wait for the 1st January 2007 to set out some new goals for myself and im going to work my butt off to get this debt down and would appreciate all your help and support to do it.

Im off to bed now. Thanks for being there and not judging me. I will not let you down again

Buddiebabe x

Seaxwyn

Well done BuddieBabe - good to hear your more positive tone and fighting talk!

You CAN get that promotion. Rehearse the interview in your head over and over - any questions you know they will ask, anything you think you didn't answer so well last time you applied. You are older now and have more experience and you can make them see you are the woman for the job.

I've got high hopes of 2007 as well - and Im looking forward to reading your thread as inspiration.

gallygirl

Buddiebabe - glad you're feeling more positive!!! To help you prepare for interview I've copied some questions we use which I gave to Kathfich a few months ago -

Many employers now do competency based interviews where they look for specific examples of key skills. We ask for specific examples, and are looking for BAC - Background, Action, Conclusion. In other words set the scene, tell them what YOU did ( I word good, WE word bad!!!!!) and what the outcome was, e.g. the project came in on time and under budget etc.

If you can't think of specific examples in your work life tell them. They will be aware you have less experience than the other candidates. Ask them if you can use examples from college etc.

Some practice questions for you:
MOTIVATIONAL & JOB FIT (BAC doesn't apply here)

1. What do you see as the next step in your career? What are your long-term career aims?
2. What characteristics of your previous/current job(s) have motivated you the most?
3. What characteristics of your previous/current job(s) would you be happy to avoid?

BUILDING & MAINTAINING EFFECTIVE RELATIONSHIPS
1. Tell me about a time when you had to make extra effort to satisfy a particular client or individual at work. Were you able to satisfy their needs? If not, what went wrong and how would you do things differently next time?
2. Describe a situation where you had to involve or enlist others to help solve a problem. What was your contribution to the project?

ADAPTABILITY & EMBRACING CHANGE
1. Tell me about a time when your own role has changed and how you coped with this.
2. Tell me about a situation in which you had to adjust quickly to a significant change in organisation, department, team or social priorities. How did the change affect you?

TEAM WORK & PEOPLE
1. Describe a time when you have had to lead and motivate team members to perform at their best.
2. Give me an example of a time when a team or group of which you were a member accomplished its goals. What was your role? What were the team’s objectives?
3. At times we all have difficulty getting along with other team members. Tell me about a time when you have experienced such difficulty and explain how you handled the situation.
4. Have you been in a position when a team member was not pulling their weight? How did you handle the situation? How was it resolved?

These are all fairly generic questions. Look at the job description and write some questions based on the specific skill sets for the post.

Closing questions - I think the 1st one here is a stunner!!!!!
o I would like you to spend a couple of minutes reflecting on what you have told me, to see if there are any other strengths you have that we have not talked about’:eek:
o Why should you be considered for this position?
o What are your career objectives, and what actions have you taken toward achieving them?

Good luck!!!!

3LITTLEPIGS_2

HI just read through your thread today....you sound really determined but you need more belief in yourself that you can do it!
I have 3 boys and also list on ebay,i find that listing about 3-4 things an evening makes it managable and achievable and i don't dread it,also you don't have everything to send out in one go....i also have housework that never ends but find that giving myself an hour to do as much as i can(try putting an upbeat cd on that lasts this long) makes me feel that i have done the best i can and gives me time to relax and forget about it till tomorrow!
Did you also know that you can withdraw any amount out of paypal at any time? Think it costs 20p if under £50 but you can if you needed to!
Good luck-will be watching your progress!