November.2015.here.we.come

mum2one

What a day, I could flaming scream.... sods law my IBS kicked in this morning, so dosing up on tabs to be able to leave the house.

Cafcass visit - the famous letter from him, sick bucket was not the word, everyone elses fault but his, how much it hurt him that she wrote and says she wants nothing to do with him... blah blah... and his parents have been sending photos and keeping him upto date. I was suspicious, but remembered he used photos of DD in the lifebook, and they did admit they had spoke to him... even thou they were asked not to, and had copies of all the solicitors documents so they know the score. He wants to be dad of the year. Up until 2009 he lived 4 miles away and completely ignored us, now he has a new family, lives 60 miles away, wants to be daddy of the yr.

Its been me, mum + dad who have had to do everything, until 2 months ago never recieved a penny, get £13.70 csa every 2 weeks! Yet he's allowed to drag me through the courts and question my parenting skills while he lied, cheated, abused me, as you can tell I have steam.

DD goes in saying she wants nothing at all, comes out and says the cafcass said does she want 12 letters instead of meeting him, she said she said no, then 6 letters, DD say shes said dunno, not sure about cards.... yet DD wrote saying she wants nothing, and will contact him if and when. DD did the letter at a friends so I could be totally clear as been previously accused of influencing her, haven't always left it open, thou hope she would wait till old enough to understand.

I've got DD in a state, I'm just as bad, top it shes back at school 2mor and doesn't want to go, just literally at wits end.

taxi73

Don't know what to say really except big hugs to you all...school will probably take her mind off things.

The_Dragon

Oh hun, I am really sorry that you, DD and your parents have to go through this, I really hope the courts see him for what he is and tell him to stick it where the sun don't shine :mad:

BEAT_THE_DEBT

big hugs for you and dd.x

mum2one

Got DD off to school ok, shes quite happy as she doesn't have to read at a weekend... they get starts everytime they read, and get little prizes hit a target, so now she doesn't want to read at wend, shes not sure on her teacher, but thin thats coz the last one for 2 yrs... but we're getting there.

Emailed the other grandparents, to say whats going on, and thats fun + games, apparently I should be plzed as punch that there so in love with DD and want to share it with family, - despite being asked originally by solicitor (admittadly 4 yrs ago) and by me.

I said that there driving a wedge, and it would boil down to they can't be trusted its either me or them!! they've choosen their son, guess blood is thicker than water, DD bit upset, but as she said shes only met them once. Then they ask can i pick up her bday presents and have a chat, just give up!!

Spent 8 hrs online doing damm schoool goveneror training, only half done, but I've new certificates!!

Money - give up, the loan company still digging their heels in, so threatened to go bankrupt, so they decided there try and help! more bills to be paid soon... in one hand out the other.

So so day.... sorry I've ranted and raved, really trying to be positive, just need the lottery numbers, clear my debts then get a fresh start, dd has asked can we change our surname as she doesn't want any of his family tracing us!! open to suggestions, just think be so impraticable, but guess can day dream! xx

The_Dragon

Let your solicitor know and get them to write a letter saying that as they have broken DD's trust any correspondence will have to be through legal channels from now on :mad:

taxi73

You can see where her son gets his underhandedness from..you must feel so betrayed by her.DD and yourself have managed fine by yourselves all these years and you will again.I'd just try to put it behind me andforget about them as they are not worth wasting time and energy on.

say Hi to little miss for me and your Mum and Dad..hope they are all ok xxx

mum2one

The_Dragon wrote: »

Let your solicitor know and get them to write a letter saying that as they have broken DD's trust any correspondence will have to be through legal channels from now on :mad:

Thank you, I think I'm going to have to, had an email 2ngt of their other son, need you guess whos wicked witch of the west. So annoying as the first time they got in contact lasted 9 mths and they ended up being told to back off the solicitors, you really think they would learn. I ended up having to change, email address, phone numbers, mobile the whole works, its just past a joke.

DD doesn't want to see them, shes had enough, so thats a relief for me.

xx

mum2one

taxi73 wrote: »

You can see where her son gets his underhandedness from..you must feel so betrayed by her.DD and yourself have managed fine by yourselves all these years and you will again.I'd just try to put it behind me andforget about them as they are not worth wasting time and energy on.

say Hi to little miss for me and your Mum and Dad..hope they are all ok xxx

Thank you, madam says a big hi to JJ and is he going to bed early for school!!
I'm just going to let it go through the solicitors, sure he'll be rubbing his hands... xx

mum2one

A news update - phonecall from the grandmother, trying to patch things up, she was happy enough to admit she was wrong and wanted to move forward, then he came on the line, his true colours come out, when I said it was the fact that they had discussed dd with their son, whilst they know the court case is going through, and he turned round and sent he would never lie to his son.... all I said was that he does ask questions, the reason that son can not know is whilst the court case is going throu, the court have said he is not have to details or any info on DD, and he refuses to agree to just saying look you know we can't discuss it, and that he won't cause an arguement with his son.

At least it means I have something stronger to explain to the solicitor, thou I can imagine his face, as his predessor, twice down the line wrote and told them to go away, due to the fact they couldn't keep quiet.

I just feel such a damm fool, all I have done is try to make them part of DDs life, they live away, so really she would only see them 3 or 4 times a yr, but if I was asking them for money I could understand it, but I haven't I've just tried to give them a grandaughter they thought they would never see.

Hospital 2mor re knees could be fun and games.... better shave the legs 2ngt, don't think carpet a very good look!! xx