Alcohol self help thread II

lewt

jayne i wa sthinking you said you could'nt go to AA coz of were you worked and that there are some many alkys go there, do you thing its the ones that dont work that go? i would think its them that need to go. just a thought as i have been thinking about you this morinig. you did sound to good last night.

beer2006

Al_Mac wrote:

Did anyone say you could have an opinion?

:rotfl:


Sorry Al

jayne.doe

lewt wrote:

jayne i wa sthinking you said you could'nt go to AA coz of were you worked and that there are some many alkys go there, do you thing its the ones that dont work that go? i would think its them that need to go. just a thought as i have been thinking about you this morinig. you did sound to good last night.

No i think anyone goes to aa, Lewt i know my sis does, and i respect her for it. It is not for me tho. I am fine i just got fired up last night. Perhaps there were too many sad stories:o Thankyou for thinking of me but i am honestly okay.;)

mjdh1957

I felt a bit choked up and thought a lot before posting on this board. The first anniversary of Roderick's death took me a bit by surprise really, and a lot of emotions came back up to the surface.

I've only said this to a few people, but sometimes I felt guilty because there were times during our relationship when I wished he was dead. I fantasised about that at times, how it would have made my life a lot easier. But at that stage I was trapped in the 'victim' cycle so could see no way out by myself. When we broke up and I started to rebuild my life I rediscovered my strength and used it to improve my own life rather than trying to keep our relationship together and make his life easier. I was kind of 'rock bottom', in debt with no property and having to re-start my career - but I made it work, and (though there have been other problems) I now have a supportive partner and am debt-free.

Another thing that happened was that I realised I had my own drink problem - I could blame it on him, but for a long time I was trying to 'keep up' with him so could put away a bottle of wine a day or even more. I first cut that back drastically then at a later stage I stopped drinking completely (about four years ago now). So as well as being an 'enabler' by trying to keep things under control I was becoming a problem drinker as well.

I hope you all don't mind me rambling on, but it has helped.

Love to all!

Michael

lewt

jayne.doe wrote:

No i think anyone goes to aa, Lewt i know my sis does, and i respect her for it. It is not for me tho.

just wondered why that is if you havent been?

Al_Mac

mjdh1957 wrote:

I hope you all don't mind me rambling on,

Usually my job, but you can have a turn Seriously feel free, it helps:o

jayne.doe

michael hi, ((((hugs)))) . Lewt my sis went through a tape with me a bit "happy clapping", and "confessional" for me but i mean no disrepect to anybody, what ever works.:o

lewt

happy clapping? what tape was it?

jayne.doe

An american one:) I did pause for thought a couple of times tho:)

mjdh1957

Hi Jayne,

Sometimes, 'confession', whether to a self-help group like AA, or a counsellor, or just a friend or internet group like this, is exactly what helps people to get through difficult situations.

From my own experience, it was only when I stopped keeping everything bottled up, pretending everything was OK, that I started to heal myself, and telling people about the problem put things into perspective for me. It helps a lot to talk, and though I've not been to AA I have heard that lots and lots of people find it helpful and it keeps them going during the black periods that we all get. It might seem 'American' but then sometimes I think we British are too buttoned up for our own good and it might not be a bad thing to do a bit of 'American' style for a change.