The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

VK-2008

Hi girlies and guys
Got mixed news today
My iui cycle has been abandoned due to over stimulation
They will only do treatment with 3 or less eggs and I had 4 biggies they said 1.8 1.9 1.5 and 1.4 plus lots of small ones
Are these good sizes
We have been told to have protected sex so that there is no risk of multiple pregnancy - been told clomid a gonal f 75 both low doses are too much for me - which on one hand is a gd thing I reacted well just too well
So the quality is there and the numbers so next month is just gonal f
Has anyone ha similar I'm guessing this is better than lower egg quality I think
It's our first time so all new to this
As to the protected sex should we take a risk and see if we get pg? I mean after 7 years of ttc and one m/c surely it might work bd'??
What would you guys smdo if you were me? Do you think the risk is just too high?
I don't believe for a moment that others in my situation use protection all the time
Iv spoke dh round to bd!
Plus if we do et pg we would surely get an early pregnancy scan due to having the drugs to check for multiples etc
So confused my minds working overtime since leaving docs an hour ago
But no wonder I have felt tired if my body has been working overtime making the eggs
Hope the self injectors are doin well x

Nicki

If you are going to take a chance, take a moment first of all to really think about how you might cope with triplets or quads. Not just how lovely it would be to have 3 or 4 children, but the practicalities of having 4 newborns at once and whether you would in reality be able to cope.

Some things to consider:

1. It would almost certainly mean you couldn't breastfeed if that was something you wanted to do. Even if you learned how to feed two at once, newborns often feed for an hour at a time every 2-3 hours. So you would have no time to do any of the other childcare tasks for your kids.

2. You can buy pushchairs for triplets and quads but they are eye wateringly expensive, usually made to order or imported from the states, and are massive and very heavy to push especially as your children get older. You would not be able to use them on public transport or in most shops because they wouldn't fit. So unless you have someone at home with you during the day, you wouldn't be able just to nip out and buy extra nappies or formula milk or some chocolate for yourself (:D) without asking someone to help you by looking after the kids.

3. Sleep deprivation x 4. They wouldn't all wake at the same time, but none of them would be able to sleep all the way through the night for at least the first 6-8 weeks if you are very lucky, and the first year or more if you aren't. Would your OH be able to help with night waking if he is having to work long hours to support a suddenly huge family while you are off on maternity leave.

4. If you planned to go back to work, 4 x childcare expenses. You might find it hard to find a good nursery with 4 spaces when you need them, and childminders can only take one child under 1, and I think 3 toddlers, so you would probably be looking at a nanny and paying more than the going rate for a nanny due to the large number of newborns.

Good luck whatever you decide to do though. Quads or trips wouldn't be for me, but people can and do cope with them.

bigzippy

They know better than us, and nicki raises very valid points too and pregnancies with multiples are riskier too for mother and baby. I don't know how well it compares, but when I was monitored for my first clomid I had at least 3 large follicles ready to pop and no one batted an eyelid...? I'm sure it's a risk that they could all pop, and that they could all fertilise, and that they could all implant after that, but ...for me they weren't concerned. I don't know how different the chances are, with the gonal f, of them all popping though

T2d, thanks - have bookmarked

Thanks for the support ladies, I think dh just be feeling similar, cos he's been talking about ivf and at what point we'd stop trying... :cool:

lisawood78

Fab post by Nicki, great stuff to consider and on top of that there are of course the health complications of multiple pregnancies.
BUT saying all that I would still BD (not that BDing could help me lol) and hope for the best but after TTC for ten years I am pretty desperate!

VK, I usually get my follie sizes in mm, i'm guessing they are in cm's?
If so the 1.8 and 1.9 are definitely large the others are a little on the small side but could contain an egg at a push.
Good luck with your choice

lilymay1

If it were me I would still have unprotected sex in the hope of getting pregnant.

My maim concern would be the health complications associated with multiples, with everything Nicki said in the background. Having 4 mature follicles is a very very very long way from having 4 healthy newborn babies.

fluffnutter

When I did iui I had three follicles so possibly three eggs released. This was said to be a good response and the procedure went ahead without any real concerns. I was told there was the faint possibility of triplets but I don't think it was seriously considered.

vseviour

VK, I think for me the health consequences would win out, what if you found out it was triplets but couldn't carry them the distance? I wouldn't be able to not worry about it, like Lilymay says. And as BZ says, the doctors know better than us.

Glad you're feeling a little better BZ, I'm in a similar place to you once again, having watched Babymakers, DH and I talked about IVF, and whether we should put ourselves through it, and at what point would we stop. Really recommend the book 'Pink for a girl', gets you thinking.

Thanks for blog link, t2d. Have been thinking of you x

VK-2008

the chances of all 4 working are very slim
but then again every person who gets pregnant has to weigh up the risk of multiples twins is defo manageable three would defo be hard work know someone whos done it 4 is little petrifying lol
but the chances of all four is very unlikely
i get the health concerns and i dont mean to sound selfish but i do think the benefit out weighs the risk

but on another note the nurse said that i would ovulate any day
i wasnt going to fuss on getting ovulation kits (do folk find them useful?) but my cycles are normally 33 days -14 would mean day 19 for ov but i am currently on day 11, am i more like to ovulate early due to the fact of having so many? i am bit confused but never thought to ask

TTC40

When I have had my scans, my FS was looking for them to be 1.6 or bigger on CD 11.

I would probably have unprotected BDing.

VK-2008

TMI - its been decided the risk of bd is worth it so every second day for the foreseeable is the plan!

anyone ever get in there head something - i have in my head im having twins a boy and a girl, dont ask me why i think this but i have its like something at the back of my mind, is it my subconscience (however you spell it) telling me thats what i want or it is a gut feeling it will happen who knows
but without taking the risk it will never happen, plus i had in my head i would get pg without too much medical interference this could be it or just in my head lets wait and see