The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

Primmer

BZ - good luck with your pre-op.

AFM - dreamt last night that I was in last stages of pregnancy and just starting labour. So sad to wake up and realise that this will never happen DH keeps saying that I should keep the faith that it should happen naturally but as we have been trying for 3 years and ivf didn't work I don't see it happening naturally.

bigzippy

This one's so true too.
(Most of it could also apply to long term/chronic/debilitating illness too :cool:)

My pre-op went ok, very involved. 'Cos of my never ending cold/ME symptoms, she sent me for a chest xray and a blood test, to check for an infection. Doubt there'll be anything noteworthy on either though.:) We went to see the ward I'd be on too, see where it was etc, and talked to a nurse who said it was fine for DH to stay with me til I went down to theatre, and he could even walk to the doors with me, so that was reassuring. He can't come back in to see me again til visiting at 2.30 though, but you can't win em all.

Has anyone had a hysteroscopy before? They're planning to do one while I'm having the lap & dye, but I think I'm due AF for when the op is... Gp thought it would be a problem, doc today didn't really seem sure! :cool::huh:


Primmer, I wish I had something useful to offer/say/suggest all I've got is "I'm sorry, this sucks, I'm thinking of you" it's all true, but it may start to sound like a pat response soon

:wave: to everyone else, who I am also wondering about, but if I mention a list of names I'm sure to miss loads out! So, how you doing guys?

EverTheOptimist

BZ - glad the pre op seemed to go ok. Has it eased your mind any? I haven't been through it so can't answer any questions you have unfortunately. You do sound a little more positive though.

Primmer- don't lose hope. A friend of mine had been trying for 10 years pretty much since she got married, shes got pcos. 1 round of IVF resulting in miscarriage, no other positive pregnancies. She eventually adopted an 18 month old a couple of years ago and within a year had fallen pregnant naturally. So it can happen.

Hope everyone else is doing well.

Back to lurking for me.

onestep

Hi everyone :wave:
I'm still around, just not posting much. Cd21.. I've stopped temping, & taking all my supplements. Don't see much point really.
That blog is ANGRY!! very interesting how she can be quite forgiving of the smug mummies & not so much of the God squad.

chickpea

Hi everyone!

Primmer - I have been off on hols - so sorry about your bad news. It must have been devastating. No words really.

One step - heh one-time near cycle buddy! I have just about stopped doing anything - bar DTD!! You never know..Still busy bigging up all the benefits of one-child families. All those small child care bills, and how easy it is to travel..I said that to a friend recently and she said 'is that what you've decided then?' I had to say 'no (and we have had this conversation a few times) - I am infertile, ergo I don't get to make decisions about whether or not to have another child!'

bigzippy

onestep wrote: »

Hi everyone :wave:
I'm still around, just not posting much. Cd21.. I've stopped temping, & taking all my supplements. Don't see much point really.
That blog is ANGRY!! very interesting how she can be quite forgiving of the smug mummies & not so much of the God squad.

I know, I find it good therapy :D I think she was brought up Jewish...?? So I don't know if that makes a difference to her feelings on the matter. I found the comments on that post interesting too - one lady said she was a Christian but didn't believe in that God either (which would be my take, but I've certainly met "those" kinds of Christians too :silenced:)

Hope you're ok though

ETO yep feel a bit more at ease now. Think I'm now worrying more about DH while he's waiting for me!

bigzippy

chickpea wrote: »

Hi everyone!

Primmer - I have been off on hols - so sorry about your bad news. It must have been devastating. No words really.

One step - heh one-time near cycle buddy! I have just about stopped doing anything - bar DTD!! You never know..Still busy bigging up all the benefits of one-child families. All those small child care bills, and how easy it is to travel..I said that to a friend recently and she said 'is that what you've decided then?' I had to say 'no (and we have had this conversation a few times) - I am infertile, ergo I don't get to make decisions about whether or not to have another child!'

That's what bugs the carp outta me! When they say about infertiles (which auto corrected to inferiors!!) "some chose to adopt or foster, some have success with fertility treatment, some chose to remain childless" Erm, no! It's not a choice! :mad:

onestep

Hi chickpea!! logically I know all those good things about having only one child (& I do know how bl@@dy lucky I am to have one).. But to have the assumption that's it's a lifestyle choice - as is made by many of my acquaintance - really really grates. One day I may come to believe those assumptions but at the moment it's still a big gaping chasm.
As an aside, one of my closest friends, who knows all about our ttc efforts, recommended a holiday read to me. It's about a woman who endured unsuccessful IVF treatment, her marriage failed. New partner.. & sure enough, pregnant shortly after. Strangely I didn't really enjoy it... But it just shows that even someone who is usually so sensitive can sometimes pull an absolute blinder!

Hi BZ I'm actually alright thank you hope you're ok too

chickpea

I forgot to say - AF was 3 days late on holiday...my mind did run away with me, as you might imagine..but it caught up with me on the second-last day. I am a fool to keep on believing!

You can run from AF, but you can't hide..

I am CD9 now. Surpisingly dark line on OPK today though - must keep an eye on that situation.

Have a good week!

TTC40

chickpea wrote: »

I forgot to say - AF was 3 days late on holiday...my mind did run away with me, as you might imagine..but it caught up with me on the second-last day. I am a fool to keep on believing!

You can run from AF, but you can't hide..

I am CD9 now. Surpisingly dark line on OPK today though - must keep an eye on that situation.

Have a good week!

CD1 here. I'm on holiday too and was 3 days late. I had started to think it could be my month. :mad::mad: