The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

Cake4brains

BZ - sending you virtual hugs :grouphug:

Runner - lots of luck, 8 embies is great :j

Bluemeanie_2

Hi ladies, hope you don't mind me joining this thread and sharing my experiences. I am hoping to draw strength from others experiences to get me through this difficult time. Hubby had vasectomy in 2004 after birth of his daughter with ex. Fast forward to Aug 2010 he had a reversal done for me (I have no kids of my own). His count was 19 million with mobility of 32%.

No pregnancy has happened so we have both been to the Docs early April. I have just dropped a semen sample off, results in two weeks. I have had blood tests which came back normal and am going to see the Doc again in 2 weeks for the "next stage".
Thing is I have been pregnant once before 10 years ago. I know a lot can change in 10 years but I have an awful sinking feeling that it is just going to be low sperm count and the only option is IVF, which we are not eligible for on the NHS.

I am struggling with feelings of bitterness towards him for having the snip at 25. I've been through the countless arguments in my head about how he felt like it was the right thing to do etc - I can;t get passed it at the moment.

Just to rub it in, his ex had another 2 kids after it was her idea. She wasn't daft, she kept her option open.

I always took it for granted I could have kids - strange how things turn out.

Best of luck to everyone else.

QQuaver

Bluemeanie wrote: »

I am struggling with feelings of bitterness towards him for having the snip at 25. I've been through the countless arguments in my head about how he felt like it was the right thing to do etc - I can;t get passed it at the moment.

(((Hugs))).
Don't blame everything on your DH though, it could equally be you that's the problem. Mum had a child, then mc'd her second baby and was infertile as a result for 5 years until the tubes were unblocked.

My DH had an op on his hernia when he was young and as a result, his count etc are low (not his own fault). It means we have to go through IVF to have a baby.

On the other hand, we did get pg naturally once but miscarried at 10 weeks. So low count can still produce babies.

I had all the tests including tubes and it was all clear, but by the looks of it, my eggs are not top notch. My AMH and FSH were fine, but there are no tests to find out the egg quality other than IVF.

So don't blame everything on your DH:o

How old are you? Are you eligible for egg share IVF?

Runnerduck

hi bluemeanie, welcome, i don't know what your doctor will recomend, but there may be other options before ivf

QQuaver

Runnerduck wrote: »

we have had the call, we have 8 embies :j they want to take them to blastos as they are looking good, but they are ringing on thursday morning and if they don't think enough will make it to blasto we will have them put back on thursday, but she said as it looks now it will be saturday

Yay!!! Go go embies!!!!:j:j:j

Bluemeanie_2

Thanks ladies. I am really trying not too. But I just can't grasp the silly decision. if there is something wrong with me, it was not a deliberate optional decision. I'm going to get some counselling through work.

I don't know about the egg share thing yet as we haven't progressed that far. But I don't fancy it.

bigzippy

For the ignorant - what's egg sharing? :huh:

Bluemeanie_2

bigzippy wrote: »

For the ignorant - what's egg sharing? :huh:

From my preliminary reading, some clinics allow you to have free or discounted IVF if you donate you eggs I think. Hopefully one of the ladies who knows better will be along shortly.

QQuaver

bigzippy wrote: »

For the ignorant - what's egg sharing? :huh:

You get discounted IVF if you can share your egg with other people. You need to be under 35 or something:)
http://www.ivfcliniclondon.com/en/egg-donation/egg-sharing-programme.html?gclid=CI6X5q_Eza8CFYYepAod8AzVZA

Bluemeanie_2

Thanks for the QQuaver. This is a route I may have to explore. I didn't really want to sell my eggs to fund my own IVF but think I will be left with little alternative.