The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

cakeadoodle

Could I join this thread? We haven't told anyone (apart from doc) that we are ttc and it would be a relief to share and to understand other peoples experiences.

We have been actively ttc for 2 years in March. The previous 4 years, we were not actively trying but not preventing either (assuming nature would just take its course).

Visited doc in September to discuss and blood test indicated I'm ovulating, although my results on clear blue monitor over the last few months have indicated lots of 'high' days but not a 'peak' day every month.

I'm 35 this year and really wish I had never read anything about fertility declining over this age as it has changed from just another birthday to a line in the sand. I know it's silly to fixate on an age but it doesn't stop me obsessing over every line and grey hair I find :eek: OH is 39 this year and has some grey hairs of his own

Every time I hear someone talking about the difficulty of conceiving when you get past 35 I want to scream! My colleagues are particularly fond of this conversation and are always talking about some 'poor woman' who 'left it too late'. I feel like braining them with my stapler, firstly for talking about peoples personal situations where they don't know what is going on in their lives, and secondly just for being so flaming insensitive! :mad:

My OH has just got his semen analysis back which I'm trying to decipher, all I've worked out so far is that his count might be about a third lower than normal but from what I've read, I don't think that alone should stop us conceiving. I suppose it's back to the docs to find out what happens next, I'm assuming the next step is to check out my bits and bobs

Anyway, sorry for rambling on! And I hope I haven't offended anyone with the age thing, I understand that there are people of all ages posting on this board!

chickpea

Hi Cakeadoodle - welcome!

Sorry you find yourself here though.

As you are finding, once you are over thirty it's not so unusual to have a bit of a wait. Annoyingly though, in real life a lot of people seem to find it a breeze...just not us!

Maybe you're just unlucky, and it'll just happen on month 24 or whatever..I hope so.

What's next for you? Have you done all the normal blood tests? Lap and Dye?

cakeadoodle

Thanks Chickpea

The only tests I've had so far were to check for STDs (after 10 years with the same person I should blooming hope not :eek:) and they took blood at day 21 of my cycle to check for ovulation. They actually took loads of blood so I'm a bit clueless about what they will have been testing for! To be honest, I was feeling a bit emotional when I went in so the nurse may very well have explained it all and I just didn't take it in

I think the doc said next would be an internal exam and ultrasound, before anything more invasive is considered.

I'm just hoping it's not going to be the case that both of us have something a little off!

Beetlemama

We're not going to join the thread, I just came to wish you all well.

We've lost four but we have one, and that changes everything, you only need to get lucky once and I hope it comes quickly for all of you.

xxx

Runnerduck

juju 11 is brilliant, hope they all do well xx

cakeadoodle welcome, i hope the tests pick up something that can be easily sorted, and i know what you mean about age, i'm dreading turning 36 this year!

jujugaboo

My eggs haven't done very well out of 11 eggs they could only inject 5 and 3 have fertilised. Apparently the egg quality isn't very good and some were too immature and they are probably going to do transfer on Sunday morning. I hope they continue to be OK and grow, its to early to say at the moment. I feel really disheartened I was really hoping for a good cycle as this could be our last. I know it only take one but feel awful already and I haven't even started the 2ww.

fluffnutter

jujugaboo wrote: »

My eggs haven't done very well out of 11 eggs they could only inject 5 and 3 have fertilised. Apparently the egg quality isn't very good and some were too immature and they are probably going to do transfer on Sunday morning. I hope they continue to be OK and grow, its to early to say at the moment. I feel really disheartened I was really hoping for a good cycle as this could be our last. I know it only take one but feel awful already and I haven't even started the 2ww.

Oh, lovey. I've been there. My first cycle five eggs of which one fertilised but struggled, second cycle four eggs no fertilisation. I actually found the time between egg collection and transfer harder than the 2ww because I was so on edge waiting for that call and wondering what the embryologist would say.

I can't offer you any help other than to say, from the bottom of my heart, I know how you feel.

lisawood78

Ahh Juju, I recall that feeling. With my ex I had great responses, almost too good but generally out of 20 eggs collected we would get 2 or 3 terrible quality embryos.
But, it only takes one! Try to get into a better frame of mind if poss, I know how hard it is. You will get your baby/babies back and then you can nuture them as you see fit and you will be PUPO!!

Thinking of you and hoping for your embryos x

ETanny

Just wanted to pop in and tell you all NEVER give up hope. Even when you think it will never ever happen.

Me and my husband was TTC for well over 2yrs with PCOS and we're now just days away from meeting our baby. This time last year I would have laughed in someones face if they told me I would be pregnant right now.

I hope you all get your miracal babies soon xxxxx

staffiecat

Hi all,

Sillysausage, I have everything crossed for you for Monday. Try not to SS although I know thats hard !

JuJu, don't lose hope hun. Try and keep your spirits up and we are all praying for you xx

Cakedoodle, hello and welcome. I know what you mean about age, I turn 34 this year and at the same time I mark 5 yrs ttc and 3 yrs since my mc. Consultant keeps telling me that I am still young but grey hairs and wrinkles tell me otherwise

QQ, sorry this cycle didn't work, sending you lots of hugs and fingers crossed for next one - it will be the one !

Hope everyone else is well. Latest from me is that my post-op followup was cancelled as consultant was poorly. New appt arrived today and I now have to wait until April to see him again Its been 3 mths since the op, we are ttc like mad but as suspected nothing is happening. I am a few days away from af now and although I have had one or two moments of hoping I think af will be here.

Since the op I have noticed that around ov I am crying like a baby, so the drilling has obviously brought my female hormones out and subdued those male ones. Thats something I guess, except crying at work is not really something I want to make a habit out of

On a good note, I have lost 3lbs, yay! I haven't really started to follow a diet as such but have been exercising again so managed to shift those xmas pounds and I feel good in myself. Hopefully the appt in April will mean that the consultant will finally refer us for IVF.

Here's to all of us having 2012 babies, apparently its the year of the dragon (or something like that) which is meant to mean wealth and intelligence. Fingers crossed