The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

i_love_holidays_2

Congratulations Chocolate Cookie Monster - December wedding :j

Good luck in whatever you decide....i havent had to make any hard decisions like most of you i cant imagine what it must be like

jiblets1

I love holidays, just wanted to say, if you're feeling down already you should keep an eye on yourself whilst you're on clomid. Although it has no effect on the emotions of lots of people, it made me really down (and really mean). I took 3 months worth and then made the hard decision not to take anymore. It wasn't worth the effect it was having on my relationship.
With regards to the IVF, don't feel that it's your only option. It seems to be an option lots of us on this board follow, but there are those out there who decide to go straight from ttc struggles to adoption (or stopping ttc) without ever going through IVF. That's a decision for you to make - don't feel that you have to follow the same path others have.

Congrats ccm! Sounds wonderful (although it does add to the stress levels I'm sure). Try not to do too much comparing pain - your pain is as valid as anyone elses. Putting yourself back in line for potentially having your hopes dashed again is a hard thing to get your head around. Take the time to gear yourself up for it...

Cake4brains

Evening everyone. Back from my consultation at Care Sheff. Feeling very deflated and low atm. Doesnt look good at all. Said my AMH is 0.62 which is one of the lowest he's seen. My egg reserve and quality mean we have to go for ICSI, and he isnt even sure if I will respond to the drugs at all so he is putting me through a trial run. If I do produce decent eggs from that we will go straight into ICSI.

Cant believe after 2years of trying and believing we were struggling cos my OH had vasectomy reversal, that it all the 'blame' now lies with me! OH was pleased with himself as his count has shot up from 16.6 million to 58 so he's well chuffed.

Was also told my reserve is so low I may be going through menopause in the next 5-10 years. And I am only 35. Absolutely gutted.

Stupidly made plans to go out tonight cos I didnt think the news would be as bad as this. So having to stick some slap on and force a smile.

Sorry for being maudlin, just cant believe we're having to go through this

xxx

juicygirl

Hugs Cake xxx

This 'journey' is just so hard xxx

countrybum

**hugs** cakes ...try and get through tonight
btw I've been told I can be refered to Care Sheffield and am from Doncaster!!

QQuaver

(((Hugs))) Cake.
Good luck on your ICSI, and fingers crossed it'll work:)

ginvzt

Cake4brains wrote: »

Evening everyone. Back from my consultation at Care Sheff. Feeling very deflated and low atm. Doesnt look good at all. Said my AMH is 0.62 which is one of the lowest he's seen. My egg reserve and quality mean we have to go for ICSI, and he isnt even sure if I will respond to the drugs at all so he is putting me through a trial run. If I do produce decent eggs from that we will go straight into ICSI.

How did they measure your egg quality? AMH doesn't say how bad or good your eggs, only the reserve.

My AMH is 1.49, and I was told if I was referred now by NHS I would be refused treatment. I was told to go for donor eggs as my chances are very low of having a baby (consultant said less than 5%).

I stuck to my guns, and we did another IVF with my own eggs, and I had embryo transfer this morning. I was on 6 ampoules of Menopur (max dose), and they collected 10 eggs. Last time I had 1!!!!! 7 of those fertilised (they told us 6 the following morning, but when we saw the embryologist this morning, she said another one fertilised by that afternoon). One of them was very good quality, and other close behind. We had 2 transferred. There might be none to freeze, as they wouldn't freeze embryoes unless they were excellent quality.

All I wanted to say, don't give up your hope. There are many stories of success with low AMH.

Runnerduck

(((hugs))) cake4brains, dont give up hope yet its amazing what they can do xxxx

jujugaboo

Been away for the weekend but still reading.

Cake - hope ICSI works for you its always worth a shot.

Gin - great news on the transfer, sending lots of sticky vibes to you.

Good luck to everyone else.

Kittendreich

Long time lurker here...just wanted to pop up with a question - hope that's ok. Finally made it onto the NHS waiting list for IVF after ttc for 3.5 years (undiagnosed infertility - everything 'appears' fine). Annoyingly will be another 2.5 years before NHS treatment (although v thankful there is any at all!) so thinking about trying to finance one shot in the meantime.

Does anyone further down the line have any advice to get myself mentally prepared for it? I've always been healthy so I'm very nervous about messing with my body as much as IVF does, as well as the emotional impact of it all. Should I start trying to think up a 'Plan B' if IVF doesn't work (realistically we only have 2 shots at it - I'll be too old to wait for a second NHS shot and don't have the money to keep trying privately) or should I carry on with things (i.e. job I dislike, but is close to home with good maternity etc) assuming 'it' will happen one day....

Sorry for the ramble - I think I'm just getting to the next stage of dealing with our infertility & struggling a bit to make sense of it.