The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

Winky,_The_House_Elf

Hi ladies

I can't post in the other TTC thread, it upsets me. I have accepted that it won't happen au natural for us. I am extremely jealous of those who truely believe that this is their month, and are in that giddy and excited state of hope and anxiety.

There I have said it! I am a monster!

This thread on the other hand is a constant support and a place where people understand the difficulties that you face, even if we are all at different stages of our journeys. Everyone is welcome to post, but with the appropriate sensitivity.

As to your age etc Freckles. Does the urge for a baby go away just because you hit a certain milestone? Is the desire less simply because you have already had a child? Of course not. I have only had the one round of IVF, so I can't speak of how I would feel after 8 rounds- You must be superwoman! But how would you feel if you didn't try again? Relieved? Haunted by what if? Emotionaly you know more than anyone if you are ready & able to go through this one more time. If you can commit financially as well as emotionally/physically then it is down to what YOU want. Don't give a fig what others say (me included!) and do whats right for and your hubby/partner.

Sorry for the long post!

Winky x

MadMac_2

Lilo, good to know you're still being looked after but I'm really hoping you'll get some positive news soon! And reading your post has made me hungry, so I'm off to grab some late lunch! :rotfl:

Jiblets, I still like a pampering at either parents and I'm running towards 40, so I don't think that feeling every goes away! Also having a BD holiday as I just cannot be bothered to try right now and OH is struggling to manage his side of the bargain, so we've reached a midpoint and I'm hoping we get over it soon, but for now it is suiting us both. Blimey, that does sound sad to read back!

Freckles, welcome and I'll through my oar in and say if I were in your shoes I would go for it. While you are debating the issue, you could be going down the initial process and will not get back the time while you're thinking on it. I don't (unfortunately) have the knowledge of IVF/ICSI yet, but have just written probably exactly what I'm feeling at the moment - sheer frustration with myself and feeling that loss of time slipping through my fingers!

Leopardlady, you already know that I know exactly where you are coming from!

Winky, you're no monster! :rotfl:

Kind of glad I missed the furore in the heat of the posts - hope things can settle now and we'll go back to trundling along, reading what we want to, skimming the bits that upset us, and always supporting when it is needed. Hugs to all, x

angelavdavis

Hi everyone,

Welcome Freckles. I had ICSI a few months ago which resulted in a chem. preg. but to be honest, I found the whole thing too traumatic and can't contemplate a repeat episode. I was 40 in January and haven't yet had a child. OH and I are just trying naturally, using Zita West supplements and diet at the moment.

AF arrived on day 27, so almost back to normal since ICSI (four month ago!). My system has been really messed up so it has been a relief that AF is almost back to its standard 28 days. I am hoping that I ovulate this month as I haven't since ICSI either.

freckles38_2

thanks for you all messages and support. I probably knew the answer really but didn't want to IYSWIM. Need to look at clinics - don't want to try my last (too expensive and way too much testing) - back to the drawing board.

PS A couple of people mentioned about putting off things "in case". I am in the process of booking my next holiday for May next year (with my friend to NY - woohoo!). Have been ttc for 14 years and I decided a few years ago to stop putting things off for "what if..". If my miracle happened then I'm sure that I would not be too fussed about losing some money. (Not that I've got loads- still owe my dad £6k from last ICSI :eek:!) xx

Js_Other_Half

Freckles - what area of the country do you live in?

freckles38_2

I live in Surrey - and have used 2 london clinics before. ARGC and Chelsea & Westminster. Was thinking possibly about Hammersmith. x

angelavdavis

ICSI costs £5700 (including drugs) at the Esperance in Eastbourne. They offer discounts for 3+ treatments and refund any drug costs for unused drugs obviously.

freckles38_2

interesting that you said that they refund unused drug costs - as ARGC don't anymore. Something to do with Royal Pharmaceutical Code of Conduct and supply chain?

Anyway that is why I still have three packs of Merional and one of Pregnyl in my fridge. Funny that when I said "never again" (which is what I say every time it fails. Usually takes a good 6 months before I'm ready to go again but last time was about 18 months ago. But I've just checked and the bl**dy Merional is out of date. Pregnyl still in date tho. :j

Not to mention 4 packs of Cyclogest pessaries upstairs....

Spose I had my answer all along. Now need to look for a clinic x

[Deleted User]

AF appeared over the weekend but it was not really a suprise I knew for a week it would. One good thing though, in a year of having an erratic cycle 26d to 36d this will be my 3rd cycle of 34 days. At last maybe something I can work off.

Despite me telling DH for over a week I knew af was coming he was upset, kept asking if I was sure . I told him we are just going back to 'normal' no counting days for him at least, I can do that.

ginvzt

Shel, sorry about AF showing up. I know mine is going to be here any time now (temp did drop this morning, so I 'know' it is on the way), but I still feel very upbeat for some reason???

I need to get batteries for my clearblue monitor (managed to resist opening it yet), and get ready with it all once it strikes. Oh, and I am not looking forward to start the Clomid - I am dreading it!!!!