The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

sexki11en

Good luck with the job hunting Gin (if it comes to it!)

I'm not so happy in my job and haven't been for a long time, but like you, it's a nice place to work so i've done nothing about it. Until last week, when I saw a perfect job for me and applied on the spur of the moment. I had a telephone interview and found out yesterday i've been shortlisted to interview this Friday! I'm so excited.

Of course once I get a new job, is when i'll get PG, but you know what - I don't care. I'll be no worse off than I am now (it's stat mat here sadly) but with the bonus I can go back part time if I want to (I don't have that option where I am now) It's a bigger company, a 50% pay rise (don't get excited, i'm practically on min wage now lol) and lots of benefits (I don't get any now)

Fingers crossed the New Year brings us all what we want eh? I think it's our turn now.

SK x

P.s - Sorry Hi to the newbies

pupsicola

Hi Guys,

Just stumbled across this thread and have been reading all your posts. They have taken me right back to 11 years ago when I first started trying for a baby.

When I didn't concieve after 12 months my husband and I had all the tests going which came back clear. So there was no explained reason why it wasn't happening. Which in a way made things worse as there seemed nothing we could do to improve our chances

In near desperation I went to see a chinese herbalist and accupuncture specialist based in London. Also had reflexology. Dont know for sure if this had any real effect but after 8 months I fell pregnant with my now nearly 8 year old.

Would like to wish all of you every luck for 2011 and hope that New Year means a new baby

chickpea

sexki11en wrote: »

I echo what Gin has said here Chickpea. I checked my temp and used CBFM for almost 19 cycles and now that i've let go of those (on my third cycle without now) it all seems much easier to deal with and people have said I seem happier. I have no idea what CD i'm on. OK, I know it's about CD10-12 and that I should be ov soon (if I haven't already) - but we haven't done anything about it this month :eek: (well, maybe once or twice lol)

It's hard to let go of the control you feel when you're doing those things, but honestly, you'll feel a million times better for it.

SK x

I'm working on it - I'vealready ditched the CBFM. Waste of time and money. I'll still use cheapie OPKs around OV time, just to check, but to be honest, that's about it at the mo - along with a basic pg multivit and the Clomid. Good news is I've dropped a few pounds already. More to go.

I did face my fears and had dinner out with a bunch of pg women. I couldn't quite bring myself to congratulate my neighbour - I suppose she doesn't know that I know, so that doesn't matter.I'll get my husband to scribble something congratulatory in their Christmas card. I managed to not drink - it has been 6days since I last had a drink.

+++++++++

Good luck with the rest of the 2ww Gin..!

Amara

My husband won't do checks. We're both 34 . We gave up contraception in may 2008. I went to doctor in March 2009, on my own, she said we both had to had tests. He flatly refused. We had very hard 2009 year (for other reasons) so I didn't insist. Situations cleared out on the begining of this year and I fell pregant . However, I lost it at 11 weeks. Been told to try again after 3 months. In September I went privately to specialist, had proper egzamination done, scan and hormones. All results came fine. Doctor even said that could seen I just had ovulation. Suggested that fertility problems were on my OH side. He just doesn't want to. I don't know what to do.

chickpea

Hi Amara - if you got pg once since 2008, there's a good chance there's nothing wrong with either of you...just 'unexplained subfertility'. The m/c was probably just bad luck.

It'll probably happen, if you keep trying and stay relaxed as much as possible.

My husband was reluctant to do tests too - I took about a year to persuade him. If it'd make him any more comfortable, it's really not that bad - I did everything for my husband to make it easier: I got the sample jar and form from the GP, gave him a hand, so to speak, with producing the sample, and then delivered it to the hospital in my bra. No-one even had to see his mortified face, except for the GP when he talked him through the results.

Good luck!

Part_Mouse

Evening all been having refloxolgy for 5 weeks now and am on CD 24 today,unheard of for me as i don't ov my cycles are stupidly short so very exciting for me. Will have to see what the next week brings.

hugs to all that need them.

Maddie

Amara, believe me it doesn't necessarily mean there is anything wrong with your OH.

We've been trying more than 18 months, my hormone tests were fine, as was an internal ultrasound. OH's sperm analysis was absolutely fine. Either we've just been unlucky or there is something they've not found yet (next test is lap and dye in mid Jan).

Do you know why your OH is so against the tests? At the end of the dayI guess it's up to him but you need to make sure you understand why and that he understands how much it will affect you. Is he just very nervous of being infertile? It might be worth reading blogs of people who are facing this to try to understand. Also he needs to understand that there are things that can be done to help if he does have any problems.

As chickpea says, the fact you have been pregnant once is a good sign in terms of your future chances. Having one or two miscarriages is seen as being normal and nothing to worry about (not that helps in terms of your grief). So hopefully if you are able to relax and keep trying then you've got a great chance of getting there relatively soon.

In the meantime talk to your OH and try to understand as much as possible. Good luck!

QQuaver

Amara wrote: »

My husband won't do checks.

My DH doesn't like it either, so like Chickpea, I did everything. He did the sample at home, and I even got the written results for him. DH still hasn't seen our doctor:p Results were unfortunately bad, but not zero.

I had a mc at 11 weeks back in 2009 too (((hugs))).

gettingthereslowly

hi ladies, quickly dropping in to give hugs where needed (((hugs)))

been working quite a bit of overtime this week so no time for popping on.

In the 2ww now and trying not to get to wound up. AF due xmas day!!! not sure if thats good or bad (praying for the best pressie in the world but not pinning my hopes on it)

Hope you are all ok and will try to pop back on properly soon

GTS xxxxxxxxx

ginvzt

I am lucky in the respect of my OH. He had no problems going to doctors, I even asked him to make the appointment and he did. He always said we are together in this, and as the results have shown, we were both fine, no issues raised in any of the tests.

I am now on my first IVF cycle, few days before the test, and what I haven't expected was to have only 1 egg collected. Maybe my follicles are just empty most of the time and ovulation doesn't give me any eggs, but that is just me pondering.