The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

MadMac_2

Hi Nadine, welcome. You've come to the right place and you already know that everybody is hugely supportive!

I share your frustrations that everybody else seems to be falling pregnant - and I avoid bumping in to certain people like the plague! I suppose that's only natural when you so desperately want a family of your own, but I do try to keep it hidden as much as possible in the real world.

Oh well, enough rambling for now and hope to chat with you again soon, x

liloandstitch

Hi Nadine and welcome to the thread! You are very brave to read through the thread up to now, but it has given you all our backgrounds so is very good! Glad to hear that you are another survivor and hopefully all three of us will have our bfps before too long! I did not know about the stitch, I hope that it will not cause me problems when I restart IVF as I really wouldnt want to be going through that! My doctors knew that I would be doing that so hopefully it will be okay (fingers crossed smiley) Good luck with your decision though .

Butterflylady - good luck with the toddler groups, hopefully it wont take you long to make new friends XX

Ginvzt, glad you are not suffering too much - my cats like a lot of lap time too!

Lilo

shelly

Hi Nadine.

As Lilo said, glad to see you are another survivor :T

I think my stitch is ok because I have had a hysterosalpingogram since surgery and all was well. Though I have been told that when I fall pg I will have to have regular scans to make sure the stitch is holding up because the pregnancy could put too much pressure on the stitch and either loosen it or bust it altogether. If that started to happen and was left alone not only would it mess me up inside but would cause a mc. I have been warned not to be surprised if I am in hospital for the final 3 months of pregnancy.

nadine220 wrote: »

I go through ups and downs of reading everything and being really intense about it all to not being bothered. DH also finds it a lot of pressure to 'BD on demand' which also frustrates me.

Same here.
One day I feel ready to explode with longing for a child then another day I'm not really bothered and just grateful to be here.
My hubby also feels the pressure and complains we aren't spontaneous enough so now I don't mention fertile times at all but try to make sure we do it every 2-3 days at the right time.
Also I try to spice it up a bit by being in bed waiting when he gets home from work....that works a treat!! :rotfl:

Good luck

shelly

liloandstitch

:hello:Hi Shelly - its lovely the fun we face if we manage to get pregnant, isnt it! I had to have DS 6 weeks early anyway, so I am quite prepared to have a premmie, which was my consultants horror story - anything from 24 weeks:eek::eek::eek: I am sure it will be plain sailing for all of us when it happens, and if not, we will cope with it.

Bunnie, the book is called "The Natural Diet Solution for PCOS and Infertility" use healthy foods to reduce POS symptoms and become pregnant by Nancy Dunne and Bill Slater. My OH downloaded it online (we didnt have to pay) and printed it off at work for me - its quite long!! But you may be able to save it and read it online. As I say, its not for everyone, but as I now know I am dairy intolerant - it was a very good diet for me to follow for a while (and I loved the weight loss) I am hoping to follow it again in a few months when I am allowed to try again (Sept) but I am having to summon up the enthusiasm as it is very hardcore!

Lilo

Bunnie1982

Thanks lilo, will look it up. From reading what you've mentioned about it, I feel it will also be beneficial for me with regard to my IBS too.

Feeling sad this evening so just eaten a tube of pringles......not good!

liloandstitch

It is great Bunnie, but it takes some thinking about. Breakfast was hard particularly. I used to have fruit, but I had a stomach bug, and now have trouble eating too much fruit at once, even with nuts. So I would have to have a bit of a rethink. I would prob have to include some wheat free things, like oats, couscous, rice etc to be able to eat enough.

Hope it helps you - Lilo

shelly

liloandstitch wrote: »

:hello:Hi Shelly - its lovely the fun we face if we manage to get pregnant, isnt it! I had to have DS 6 weeks early anyway, so I am quite prepared to have a premmie, which was my consultants horror story - anything from 24 weeks:eek::eek::eek: I am sure it will be plain sailing for all of us when it happens, and if not, we will cope with it.

Tell me about it!! After my surgery we saw a specialist who talked to us about the complications of carrying a pregnancy after my type of surgery. My hubby was shocked when I said I had to think about if I wanted to carry on TTC or to stop trying and go back on the pill.
It really frightened me (and still does if I am honest) that even if I got to 3 months the pregnancy would be taken on a week to week basis and any sign of weakness in the stitch would mean I would have to go in to Addenbrookes for the remainder of the pregnancy.

Of course I am up for that if it means carrying a baby to term but I dread to think of the pressure on my hubby and parents when they want to visit.
The local hospital is about 20 mins away from us but Addenbrookes is well over an hour away.

Like you say though, I'm sure we will cope with whatever else life has to throw at us!
Gotta keep up the PMA.....I have always said that I won't worry about things I have no control over because it's wasted energy.

Shelly

ginvzt

Welcome Nadine. You are really brave and PATIENT to read through all our rumblings!!!! So, you know that I am the one who keeps moaning all the time...

I hope to start TTC very soon after my lap&dye, and I am quite optimistic. I would love to get that FP this month, as I am going to visit my family end of August and would be fantastic to tell them the good news, but I don't think I will be up for it in the next day or so. TMI alert - I had some gunk coming out, which was definitely not the dye, and there are still bits coming, so I hope it was a lot of stuff in the tubes that was not helping us in our quest.

I decided to go for a bit of a walk yesterday, as sitting on the sofa all day is not my dream. So, when OH finished work, we agreed to meet in local ASDA, which is about 15 min walk for me, and is on the way from work for him (about 40 min drive for him). It took me nearly half an hour to reach it, and I was very tired, but glad for the excersise.

nadine220

It is really scary, my consultant said the same about possible bed rest or hospital for the last couple of months - although I'm so exhausted and need a holiday at the moment so the thought of staying in bed for a month or two is very appealing lol!

I'm hoping it doesn't come to that as my consultant is in Barts, London and I live just outside Southampton (they do the same op there now but didn't when I had my surgery). Am trying to swap check ups to Southampton so that I don't have to take a day off work every time (alongside fertility appointments) but hey work isn't really the important factor here.

Am going for reflexology on Thursday night, heard fors and against but figure it can't hurt, if anything it will relax me. I've also heard that rose aromatherapy oil helps so I have been burning that but I'm going to ask the reflexologist (who also does aromatherapy) how oftern to use all these things. Will let you know how I get on.

Good work on the exercise ginvzt. It's hard work to get going isn't it. My BMI was 36 but I've managed to get it down to 34 so far but need to get down to below 30 if we want to be considered for NHS IVF funding - argh!

Js_Other_Half

nadine220 wrote: »

Good work on the exercise ginvzt. It's hard work to get going isn't it. My BMI was 36 but I've managed to get it down to 34 so far but need to get down to below 30 if we want to be considered for NHS IVF funding - argh!

Check other clinics in your area, mine has a limit of 35 for IVF, but some adjoining PCTs have 30...

http://www.hfea.gov.uk/1896.html