Stop me getting arrested!!!

Bettyboop

Buy play equipment for the garden then he wont need to go to the park... however that is not fair in hindsight. If they can be sorted out that will be the best for everybody. Keep a close eye on him and if the bullying is affecting him to a degree do not allow him to go unless the situation blows over or gets resolved one way or another.

cheepskate_2

As well as trying to stop this , i also think you have to start building up your sons social network.

Invite kids round, but go somewhere where they can play in peace.

I am sure there is people about with kids the same age who dont allow their kids free reign in being out and about.

My son is 9 and i dont allow him to go to park on his own , for this reason.

blue_monkey_2

I still say to call the police and tell them what you have seen. I live in a village and have done all of my life and no, it is not like the old days where everyone looks out for everyone else. There are very few people around as most of them are working for paying for their country lifestyle, if we go to the park we can often get there, play for an hour and get back without seeing a soul. In a year of living here I've been up the park twice and found people, otherwise it has been empty. There is absolutely no way I would let my kids play out alone at the age of 7 - and an immature age of 7.

You say he asks, well I would say no. My kids asks for all sorts and just because they ask it does not mean you give it to them, if he asks for a cigarette would you give it to him? No, and in the same instance you'll have to say no and he will have to understand why. I find it strange that he is that desperate to go and play somewhere where he is being attacked on a regular basis though. Why does he want to go and play out there?

The school will not do a great deal as this is happening out of school, they look after the kids when they are in school. I would not viseo them as you can get in trouble for that. No, 2 wrongs do not make a right but if someone says you have been videoing them then you will be in more trouble.

Go to the police, it is what they are there for. A 12 year is not a 'kid' being a kid when he is bullying a child of 7 - he is being a bully and he is old enough to be charged with ABH or GBH. If your son comes home with one mark then call the police and tell them your 7 year old son has been assaulted again and you have had enough and you want to press charges. It seems like that these 'kids' need are a good kick up the backside.

Alternatively you could go and see these 'kids' and tell them that if they lay another finger on your son or take something else that belongs to him then you will be calling nthe police and that they are old enough to be charged as they are not children. Tell them that this is their last and final warning. And if they do anything at all to your son carry out that threat. Otherwise just where do they draw the line, if your son had fallen out of that tree then maybe you would be on here with a different story to tell..... just a thought.

The 2 boys that killed Jamie Bulger were 10. This NEEDS dealing with now and if the parents are not doing anything then let the police deal with them.

amersall

tiamai_d wrote: »

I am at my wicks end, I'm stressed up to the eyeballs and all that stuff, tearing my hair out. I need advice because I really don't know what to do anymore!

DS1 is 7 and we live right next to the park. Everyday he goes to the park and everyday if there are more than 3 other kids there he ends up being picked on. He gets hit, scratched, spat on, pushed, any toys he has taken get stolen, I've had his shoes thrown away by the little brats! Scooters have been wrecked. Honestly it is every time he is there. The other kids range from his age to over, boys and girls but there are several 'ring leaders'.

The ring leaders just don't like him (he is immature for his age meaning he is not a thug as tbh most of the ones who are picking on him are foul mouthed little thugs). He walks out the door and all you hear is them yelling 'There's DS1, quick somebody whack him!'. So DS1 goes and climbs up the tree, they start throwing stones, one gets up high enough to drag him down (sometimes) and one or two of them hold him while the rest take turns to hit him.

However, if there is less than 3 they don't bother as he can hold his own against 2 of them!

Last week I did get angry, one came to the door to tell me that DS1 had hit him as he came running up he was trying to take DS1's skateboard off him to hit him with it and in the process my front door got whacked, I opened the door to one red headed child calling my red headed child a ginger wee btard and a number of other lovely names. I shouted that I didn't want to hear who had hit who and I didn't want my door damaged and that it was a bit thick insulting someone on the colour of their hair when you have exactly the same colour. The boy then ran away back to the park still yelling abuse at my son.

Sometimes DS2 goes to the park with him, but he is left alone (and I watch them like a hawk from the window, which really doesn't help as I then see exactly how it is there).

What can I do? We can't move house. DH has tried to talk to the kids (he is more diplomatic than me and knows most of them from the youth group he does), I can't keep him in all summer...but I'm going to end up getting arrested!!!

Should I petition the council to get rid of the park (they tried that at the begining of the year to make way for new houses, I actually wish they had just done it)?

I just feel useless. And he keeps going back to the park.

you have one tough little cookie there, i think its good to know that he sometimes holds his own, and that should put him in good stead for the future. but he should not be picked on and hurt this way, please phone the police and see what they can do to help, good luck xxx

hollydays

What does he say that makes you feel you must let him out there ?
I am NOt saying you are wrong,but I know from many years ago (i Am now a young grandmother) that villages are very different to towns

tiamai_d

A nice mixed bag of views and ideas. Will sit down with DH and try and decide what we are going to do about this. Atleast I know I'm not alone in wanting to keep him in!

amersall

blue_monkey wrote: »

I still say to call the police and tell them what you have seen. I live in a village and have done all of my life and no, it is not like the old days where everyone looks out for everyone else. There are very few people around as most of them are working for paying for their country lifestyle, if we go to the park we can often get there, play for an hour and get back without seeing a soul. In a year of living here I've been up the park twice and found people, otherwise it has been empty. There is absolutely no way I would let my kids play out alone at the age of 7 - and an immature age of 7.

You say he asks, well I would say no. My kids asks for all sorts and just because they ask it does not mean you give it to them, if he asks for a cigarette would you give it to him? No, and in the same instance you'll have to say no and he will have to understand why. I find it strange that he is that desperate to go and play somewhere where he is being attacked on a regular basis though. Why does he want to go and play out there?

The school will not do a great deal as this is happening out of school, they look after the kids when they are in school. I would not viseo them as you can get in trouble for that. No, 2 wrongs do not make a right but if someone says you have been videoing them then you will be in more trouble.

Go to the police, it is what they are there for. A 12 year is not a 'kid' being a kid when he is bullying a child of 7 - he is being a bully and he is old enough to be charged with ABH or GBH. If your son comes home with one mark then call the police and tell them your 7 year old son has been assaulted again and you have had enough and you want to press charges. It seems like that these 'kids' need are a good kick up the backside.

Alternatively you could go and see these 'kids' and tell them that if they lay another finger on your son or take something else that belongs to him then you will be calling nthe police and that they are old enough to be charged as they are not children. Tell them that this is their last and final warning. And if they do anything at all to your son carry out that threat. Otherwise just where do they draw the line, if your son had fallen out of that tree then maybe you would be on here with a different story to tell..... just a thought.

The 2 boys that killed Jamie Bulger were 10. This NEEDS dealing with now and if the parents are not doing anything then let the police deal with them.

i 100% agree with what you say

hollydays

Again,it is all about communication.

Communicate with your school.



The Police-hang back,but befriend the local officer,get info to strenghthen you.

tiamai_d

If I say he is not allowed to go to the park he throws a strop and just doesn't understand why not. I try explaining that so and so is there and it will just end up in a fight but he simply says he will run away/fight back etc. I'm then made to feel the bad one for not letting him go have fun. And then he gets hard to deal with because 1 he is in a mood and 2 he hasn't expelled all his energy. The back garden and his room are boring ofcourse :rolleyes:

And then if it's Dad's day shift week (home for 4pm) he tells me to stop wrapping him in cotton wool and lets him out. Which is fair enough he can go out and deal with it but then the next week when he is at work I'm left with a child who says Dad lets him go.

I try to go out as much as possible with them, even if it's just a walk with the dog down the woods but right now I'm more or less confined to the house due to issues (and medication) in this pregnancy. I've been told to take it easy and been advised to be on sofa rest (as bed rest is just out of the question).

Having a look to see if I can find out who our local copper is, get some advice from them for a start.

And school is finished as of today so I can't speak to the teachers (who were and are crap anyway, they can't sort bullying at the school never mind elsewhere).

MagicMummy_2

I really don't want to be rude as I know that this is a horrible situation for you but a 7 year old is too young to be going anywhere on their own these days. As a parent I am quite laid back I think but I would not allow this under any circumstances.

I do think that you should call the police as these bullies need to be stopped NOW but I also think that you should be prepared for them to question a 7 year old being allowed to the park on their own.

I genuinely feel that you should reconsider allowing him to a park as there are some very sick people out there.