Shared Birthday party what to do about presents

Mumto2

bonty44 wrote: »

This year DS1 asked his friends NOT to bring him a present but to donate an Easter egg to a local children's charity instead; I was SO proud of him!!!

Bonty 44 - did it work? How old is your DS? Maybe if he was older and it was worded from him, I could see it working well. Sounds like a good lad :T

mini

You could put a little line on the bottom of all invites "presence is more important than presents!" we got a wedding invite with that on, still go them a present but the words were appreciated

Janepig

Another vote here for not saying anything and leaving the guests to do what they wish. Don't complicate matters needlessly. As others have said, in all probability the party boy and girl would have had single parties if the joint one was not an option so parents would still have had to buy a two pressies anyway. Joint parties seem to be the way forward in DD's school and (DD shared with 3 others this year) and I buy a present for all the birthday boys/girls.

DS recently went to a party where the birthday boys were his friend from playgroup who was 3, and his baby brother who was 1. I didn't know the little brother, but myself, and the gaggle of mums I'm friendly with, all bought something cheap and cheerful for the baby as we couldn't leave him out.

Jxx

Rachel85

mini wrote: »

You could put a little line on the bottom of all invites "presence is more important than presents!" we got a wedding invite with that on, still go them a present but the words were appreciated

I agree with not over complicating things, however if you're concerned people may not be able to come because they can't afford a gift then I think the above is perfect. It doesn't tell people what they have to do, but makes it clear gifts (whether for one or both children) aren't compulsory!

charliecheese

how about saying something on the invitations along the lines of "homemade gifts only, but no gifts is also fine". that way the other parents don't feel pressure to buy the presents, and if their kids really want to take a present they can make one cheaply, but also have fun doing so. if not, just don't mention the gifts at all i reckon.

Millie's_Mum

I like prescence is more important than presents, I will suggest it to the other mum and hope she is happy with just putting that.

bonty44

Mumto2 wrote: »

Bonty 44 - did it work? How old is your DS? Maybe if he was older and it was worded from him, I could see it working well. Sounds like a good lad :T

It did work apart from 2 people who brought a token gift for him, which was kind of them ...but he was delighted to be donating 18 Easter eggs! And it was his 7th birthday, what a little star he is.
I am hoping that DS2 won't mind 'suggesting' Christmas shoe box contributions instead of presents for his birthday but, as he's going to be just 5, he might be a bit young ... I'll run it past him.
DS1 said to me 'I'd rather give Easter eggs to the children in hospital Mummy, I don't need 18 presents'

I'll never forget the birthday party we went to a few years ago ... the birthday girl had invited 2 classes and cousins, neighbours, etc. and took home over 65 birthday presents! :eek::eek::eek:

Janepig

charliecheese wrote: »

how about saying something on the invitations along the lines of "homemade gifts only, but no gifts is also fine". that way the other parents don't feel pressure to buy the presents, and if their kids really want to take a present they can make one cheaply, but also have fun doing so. if not, just don't mention the gifts at all i reckon.

:eek::eek::eek: Nooooooo. Nothing would strike fear into my heart more than having to "make" a present!!! I have no imagination. I know some people are very talented in that respect (see the special occasions board!!) but I would think they're in the minority. Oh noooo <goes cold at the thought of an invitation saying "home made presents">. :rolleyes::D I'm afraid that would be one party invite we'd be turning down!

Jxx

Janepig

Millie's_Mum wrote: »

I like prescence is more important than presents, I will suggest it to the other mum and hope she is happy with just putting that.

They'll still bring presents, I guarantee it. But if it makes you feel better then go for it!

Jxx

galvanizersbaby

Millie's_Mum wrote: »

I like prescence is more important than presents, I will suggest it to the other mum and hope she is happy with just putting that.

Yes I like this

If it were me I probably wouldn't put anything more than that followed by a smiley face

Do all the party boy and girls know all the guests or are most of the guests mutual friends?

My DS got invited to a joint party in the 2nd week of starting reception class - it was a boy and girl I had assumed were both in his class but turned out the girl was from a different school so my son would not have known her - the parents just choose to combine their parties - I brought pressies for both of them - didn't really bother me - I have a pressie box (like many other mser's with toys I have picked up from grabbits on this site)

Hope they all enjoy themselves!