Needs must when the devil vomits into your kettle! Bob's cunning plan mark 2

shaun40400

Bob
you say he sleeps a lot and avoids things!!
He has depression....CLASSIC SIGNS,,,,

ZTD

shaun40400 wrote: »

Bob
you say he sleeps a lot and avoids things!!
He has depression....CLASSIC SIGNS,,,,

I would concur with this...

boredofbeingathome

Urrgh again...lost my post.

Have to agree with you both Shaun and Z, i think he has been depressed for a while. I did ask him if he was and he said not.But like i said before, he is not the man i married...well i know we are all different now, but you know what i mean.

So as KC said, i will make some decisions when i am in better health myself and also have to get Mr.B to the docs. I will make him an appt this week as we are all off for half term. We were going to see DD1 in Cornwall, but none of us are fit to drive and she has just started a new job...so rest and re couperation are on the cards.
Other stuff - at least i got expenses back so that will make up the short fall with Egg this month. Mr.B gets paid next week so he can begin to plan. That's about it at the moment.

Thanks for all your thoughts...tis the good thing about MSE. x

shaun40400

bob hope you get away for the week....break will do you good

make a deal with mr bob
make the journey down about your debts,,,,after that dont mention it again till coming home,,,,

journey down,,we will discuss in general 20mins each,,,,no finger pointing...where we are with the debt's,,,

take 10min music break

now for the next 20 future plans to get out of debt,,,,let him go first,,,,would Imagen he will be done after 5 mins

at this point you can then set up your plan to include his pocket money idea,,
"which we will have to follow as you obviously. dont have a plan,,,,,and if things stay like this im off!!""

give him time to respond,,,and inform him the new plan will take effect as soon as we are back off the holidays
s xx

ps
dealing with debt is one thing dealing with depression,,,,wow bob you have your hand full,,

me and the ex both had it for years,,,,,afraid to say we just couldn't work with one another any more:o

pepe2008

....and when you go to Cornwall, get to M42 TURN LEFT to M40, go to J9, turn off and ring me! Have a break ( both of you ) theres always room / food/wine/ beds etc.....bring chocolate though:D
Is Mr B scared of life without the ease and convenience of CC's?........after all, while you have CCs with available limits you dont have to think or plan.

boredofbeingathome

shaun40400 wrote: »

bob hope you get away for the week....break will do you good

make a deal with mr bob
make the journey down about your debts,,,,after that dont mention it again till coming home,,,,

journey down,,we will discuss in general 20mins each,,,,no finger pointing...where we are with the debt's,,,

take 10min music break

now for the next 20 future plans to get out of debt,,,,let him go first,,,,would Imagen he will be done after 5 mins

at this point you can then set up your plan to include his pocket money idea,,
"which we will have to follow as you obviously. dont have a plan,,,,,and if things stay like this im off!!""

give him time to respond,,,and inform him the new plan will take effect as soon as we are back off the holidays
s xx

ps
dealing with debt is one thing dealing with depression,,,,wow bob you have your hand full,,

me and the ex both had it for years,,,,,afraid to say we just couldn't work with one another any more:o

Thanks Shaun, sorry to hear about your past problems. I have been depressed though it has been post natal depression...a horrible black hole that i never want to visit again.So you have my sympathies.:o

Re the idea of the break, well all 4 of us are/were going he is still rotten on oink front, although i suspect a lot of it is due to depression now. I do think he needs a visit to GP's and will just see from there. Although we can have a little drive out locally ..some fine scenery and walks around here. It may work equally as well....as in hike/talk/brew/talkhike/brew..............kill two birds and all that.:D

boredofbeingathome

pepe2008 wrote: »

....and when you go to Cornwall, get to M42 TURN LEFT to M40, go to J9, turn off and ring me! Have a break ( both of you ) theres always room / food/wine/ beds etc.....bring chocolate though:D
Is Mr B scared of life without the ease and convenience of CC's?........after all, while you have CCs with available limits you dont have to think or plan.

You are not too far from my brother's Pepe:rotfl:

I would bring big bar of choccie:D


I do think that is the problem Pepe..he relies on them to supplement his budget then didn't realise that they stealthily eat away at budget.:o

EssexHebridean

That's the problem with plastic though isn't it - if you're the wrong kind of personality to be let loose with a card it's like living your life as a giant game of monopoly - the money is going out but it's not "real money" and so it doesn't matter - and if you don't open the envelopes and look at the statements you can pretend it never happened. Most of us have been there I guess, but the thing that differentiates those of us who are regulars on here from "the others" like Mr Bob is, i guess, that we have all seen the light, as it were.

I would say that from what you have written, you know yourself now that the time is rapidly coming when a decision needs to be made - it's not going to be an easy one obviously, but you owe it to yourself to do something I think. It may be that your decision is to carry on as you are - which is fine so long as that is a conscious decision rather than simply carrying on without questioning or challenging. I wish you all the luck with it, and you know where we all are if you need to rant/talk out loud / let off steam etc.

redsquirrel80

I hope you can find a way through things one way or another. Maybe Mr B doesn't even realise or admit to himself that he's depressed, hard to get out of it if you can't acknowledge it.

Big hugs for you x

elantan

oh honey i wish there was something i could say or do to help .....most importantly though ....look after yourself though ...

wanna thank z as well the idea about keeping indebt so you dont go had me thinking too ....it makes alot of sense doesnt it ?