A new start for Mooloo

Jo4

Are you feeling any better?

Savvy_sewing

Hello, I didnt come back on to the computer again yesterday. DS came back and hijacked it.
I slept for a couple of hours, then spent the rest of the evening just watching CSI on the TV. (Usually a programme that the twins watched).
I started to get really prickily skin and by about midnight I had to take my gabapentin. But I havent taken any of the other medications.
It means my arm is giving me all the old signs etc, heavy, hard to move, painful all the way down, little fingers numb. Pins and needles etc, but my head is not quite so fuzzy.
I have managed to get off of the sofa today, and do 30 minutes in the garden.
Have been catching up on Emails etc, from all the survey sites, etc etc.
DS went out again last night and stayed at his mates house, in Towcester.
He came home about 15 minutes ago, checked his Email, and then he has now gone to Oxford. It doesnt appear that he has the apprenticeship with his Dad afterall. His dad is on holiday so I cant ask him whats happened. He said the interview had gone well. He actually had near as dam promised DS that the job was his, he just had to go through the motions of interviews etc. So DS is upset.
He is off to wallow with one of his mates. He said he will stay there a few days.
I have told him that he needs to start to look for other work, or he will have to consider going back to education, as I cant keep him if hes not. God why is life so beeping awful!?

Savvy_sewing

He will miss my birthday now as well.:o
I know that we havent anything special to celebrate, but I shall be on my own most of the day. BF is coming over in the evening, so I shall try to cook us something special.
I just feel a bit low, that after years of having everyone around me, I am going to wake up on my own and have all day on my own!. (Selfish of me I suppose. I did send them out into the big wide world afterall).
Think I will have to remember to clean out the teas made, and set it up, so that I can at least have a cup of tea in bed!.:D
Time to stop mopping and get on with a bit more around the cottage.
I have spent about 30 minutes weeding in the garden, trying to save my lettuces and last batch of onions that have become strangled with weeds. The other section of the garden is also getting covered. Looks like the tryphids have started to grow, with all this wet weather.!!
Wellies needed, and another attempt between the sunshine and showers.
I have put the clothes airer into the greenhouse so that I can dry the washing, as the lineis too high for my left arm to reach the way it is today.:T

whiteguineapig

you sound so down today. i don't usually post as i have no helpful advice on benefits etc but i do know a bit about living on a tiny tiny budget so here goes (and you must just ignore me mooloo if i,m not helpful)

i think you have jumped out of the frying pan into the fire almost. i think you have isolated yourself too much.
would you be better living some where else not so alone?

could you not weigh it up and think where you could rent somewhere near (but not TOO near) the rest of your family and bf ?
by living in a rural place you need extra money for petrol and spend a lot of time driving ,
would a small cosy flat with spare bedroom for ds be nice and maybe a small outside space like a yard for drying washing and maybe a couple of tomato plants ect?
within a short driving distance from twins and dd ?
maybe nearer to bf?

my other thought would be one that applies to me as well. i have a big garden too, it is REALLY hard work and i am fairly fit but it takes me all my time to keep the weeds down! i have long since given up with grow my own as its just more hastle than its worth (and probably cheaper to just buy reduced stuff at tesco)
this would lead to my other (and last ) point. if you moved make sure it was to within really easy driving distance to a large store , tesco is best then you could keep popping in and checking for reduced stuff. this would be on my wish list if i ever moved, ideally somewhere between a big tesco and sainsburys then i could get all the bargains, i am 100% sure that if i lived near i could halve my food bill

Jo4

Mooloo wrote: »

He will miss my birthday now as well.:o
I know that we havent anything special to celebrate, but I shall be on my own most of the day.

You haven't anything special to celebrate :eek:, it is your birthday - that would be special enough for me!! My oldest sister celebrates her 40th birthday today and she doesn't want anyone knowing. Yet the woman who used to live opposite her would have let everyone know as she died a few weeks ago from cancer. I think as long as you are here, your birthday is special and worth celebrating after all your children wouldn't be here if you weren't born!! My youngest sister was 30 last year and she celebrated the week before, the week of it and the week after and she let everyone know what age she was. Enjoy your birthday whatever special thing you do!! :beer:

taka

((((Hugs)))) Mooloo and Happy Birthday! _party__party__party_ _party_
:bdaycake:

Savvy_sewing

I love the cottage, and although it leaves a lot to be desired, I dont want to live back in the town. I would just like to be able to afford a smaller car so that I could drive occassionally. I am just not used to the big changes yet.
I am sure as time goes by I will adjust.
The thought of moving again horrifies me. This is the 19th move in 18years. I feel more gypsy then a gypsy does!
I want to settle and have a community feel. I will get this in time. I just need to be well enough to venture out of the house, and walk around the village in the evenings etc.
Sorry I am feeling a bit down, but I still dont want to go back to the fryingpan I was in.
I am sure I will manage to find something to do that I can manage work wise, soon enough. I have the back to work interview at 9am on my Birthday. Thats something to focus on. New age, new outlook? I shall be 48 so its not a major milestone.
Tomorrow I will be going out, and I will see the twins, as I am taking twin2 for her scan, check up on the baby. (Last night dreamt I had another set of twins. As thats phyically impossible after having a hysterectomy I wonder if she is? Gulp).

I am sure that I will be happy to get back home again, after I have seen them all.
Think its the fact that DS is not here at all, and I feel that he doesnt want to be here with me. All he does is pop in for a change of clothes, and money.
I told him today, that he cannot have anymore then th £10 I gave him, as I dont have it. The CSA is still not sorted out.

Savvy_sewing

taka wrote: »

((((Hugs)))) Mooloo and Happy Birthday! _party__party__party_ _party_
:bdaycake:

Its not until Wednesday, but thankyou very much. That has made me smile. :beer:

taka

Sorry I'm a bit ahead of myself... Happy birthday for Wednesday ...

lolababy

Happy birthday Mooloo. and good luck at your back to work interview .