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A new start for Mooloo
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Lack of creativity. But think of all those talented people who have elft the system because of stress, etc. or those who've burned out in children's homes. They could do a fantastic job in a complex for families in this type of need, Did you take the kids to school? Did they get their bath, this is how to wash a floor. Daily reinforcement, and routine, and support, think how many children could be kept out of the system if such a facility was in place. I'll be honest and say that I graduated into Social Work, but only lasted about three months, the nonsense, unpractical and unworkable things which I had seen whilst training put my young idealistic heart off the job. I think now I'm older I could do it, but I am too radical and find it hard to answer to superiors that I don't agree with, as I don't think you should say no to any opportunity until you've really tried it. So many ideas, but no outlet for them, I will have to decide soon, what I would like to do. Having a son who is ASD this really touches home with me, as I worry for his future, too.It's what is inside your head that matters in life - not what's outside your windowEvery worthwhile accomplishment, big or little, has its stages of drudgery and triumph; a beginning, a struggle and a victory. - Ghandi0
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Mooloo, I'm really sorry I didn't get chance to call you back, that 4 letter work word got in the way, hope you are OK. If you are still up let me know and I'll call, if not in the morning.
Take careMama read so much about the dangers of drinking alcohol and eating chocolate that she immediately gave up reading.0 -
Mooloo, absolutely the SW should facilitate contact between you and the boys, whether or not their mum has any. And when I say 'facilitate', that's not telling you where and when you can see them, but arranging for them to be brought to somewhere convenient for you.
Your DGD should also be able to see them, IMO. And if they think otherwise, then I think SS should make arrangements for her to be elsewhere.
Sometimes we just don't know what's going through people's minds. You've done a grand job, but you really can't do the impossible.Signature removed for peace of mind0 -
Hi Mooloo
A long time lurker who has always been amazed at the way you cope with everything life throws at you. My heart sank when I saw that SS had delivered the DGS's to you as I had no idea how you would be able to cope in your little cottage with all those people to look after.
I am now so incredibly proud of you for standing up to SS and for understanding that you had to let the boys go to foster care for their sakes as well as your own (& probably for DGD too).
I know you must be heartbroken at having to hand them over but they are going to be safe and well cared for and you will be able to visit and just be the fantastic Granny that you already are for them.
Your health and well being has to be number one priority so that you can continue looking after DGD whilst fighting every battle needed for yourself and the rest of your family.
Huge, huge hugs to an amazing lady. You remind me of my Mum who would have fought to the ends of the earth for her children and grandchildren in her day. And I was incredibly proud that she was my mum!:j Proud Member of Mike's Mob :j0 -
I'm so sorry mooloo,
It was the best thing for you and the wee guys for them to go to a foster family for now. As long as you know where they are and that you can get to see them, that's something at least. You've got to look after yourself after all, although as I read your thread daily, I know you will be broken hearted. I do not envy the decision you had to make one bit.
My very best wishes as always. xx0 -
Molly you know me now. You were here when I made the call to tell SS that I was not able to do this.
Twin1 saw me, and DS, last night when I was nearly crippled with the pain, before I went to bed.
had to rely on Twin1 to take care of the babies final feed as I was so bad!
Irony there isnt there. Twin1 has been so good with all three kids, but it was also too much for her. She is moving out on Monday and I will miss her, as will DGD. Its a sad week in the Mooloo household that is for sure.:(
Mooloo,
I have indeed had the privilege of getting to know you and your family. When I walked into your house on Thursday i could see the pain etched on your face. Looking after two toddlers and a baby is really tough for anyone in good health let alone someone who has an illness and physical difficulties. Then there are the issues around your housing which are totally unsuitable for little ones as there are issues regarding access to the road, lack of central heating etc. Oh and add to that the fact that you are overcrowded with 6 of you sleeping in a two bedroom house and your DS sleeping outside in a tent! Then SS "dumped" those children on you without doing a proper risk assessment - the SW declined to go upstairs, failed to take into account your physical health, failed to provide for those children - lack of clothes, milk - even a cot for the baby to sleep in! I ask you what choice did you have? They put you in this situation and compounded that by not supporting you.
It was an intolerable situation and incredibly stressful for you. I saw it with my own eyes and you have NOTHING to feel guilty for. You made the best decision for those children in dreadful circumstances. If I had half of your courage and determination i would die satisfied. Of course you feel guilty because you have integrity and you love those children - I can see that.
Social Services have treated you appallingly. I mean its a catalogue of mistakes and this needs dealing with - hopefully your solicitors can help you with this. However today you need to rest and regain your equilibrium.
Thinking of you and your family xxI must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over and through me. When it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
When the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.0 -
Mooloo, my thoughts and best wishes are with you. I just wanted to say that I agree with everyone else, you have made the right decision for you and the rest of the family including your grandsons.
You are an amazing lady and I have no doubt what so ever that you will continue to fight for your family. Please just remember to fight for yourself and what you need to.
I really hope that the solicitor can nail some bottoms to the wall over the way you have been treated. Social services should be raked over the coals.
Take care and be well.0 -
Morning from a very jaded mooloo here.
I am struggling to move, as I predicted would be the case, so knew I would not last until Monday. (and then longer no doubt if they could get away with it!).
I didnt get any copies of paperwork, nor did Twin2, so on Tuesday I will have to ask them to send me copies. My solicitor wants me to take any relevant paperwork, and I laughed and said what papework, its all been a bit scant. Made me realise that I dont have copies of the kinship forms either fr DGD. Even the family safety agreement is outdated.
I wish I was better organised. I keep saying Iwill get organised, and I will sort out the paperwork, but I am always too tired at the end of the day to do things.
I am jaded after a night of fitful sleep and mind games torturing me, with a sprinkling of nightmares as well, just for good measure!
Right, as Twin 1 is here, she is watching tV with DGD and I am going to go and have a soak in the bath, and see if I can make myself look and feel more human before my BF comes over. He is due at lunchtime I think. Glad he is coming over, as with twin1 around he doesnt always come, or she goes to her friends when he comes etc etc.When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.0 -
Ha the post has just arrived.
For TWin1 and for me, about a meeting for DD Looked After Childrens Review, on Thursday 20th May, 2010. With a questionnaire, asking both of us different /similar info to be returned by Thursday.
The questions we are asked is about the relevant paperwork etc,
Do you have the required paperwork?
Answers, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, all to just question 1.
there are 20 questions and nearly all of them my initial reply is No.
Oh dear!.When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.0 -
Morning Mooloo
Are you still seeing the physio.........the lowere back leg pains could be the result of your problems further up , my physio says that often when there is a compaction at the top of the spine then the lower end loosens causing problems further down , but exercises help mention it next time . also the stress will not be helping as you tend to tense up which aggravates our problem!! i know you will not be aable to relax but thought knowing why you are sufferring more than normal might help a little.
Take life one day at a time and enjoy that holiday , your not a failure .........just human
Shazxx*****
Shaz
*****0
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