The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread! Part 3

Miss_Piggy_2

Morning all

FUAS - glad to hear it went well. Was wondering how you got on so glad to hear an update

Fay - lots of good advice on how to deal with your friends. It's really hard for some people to get thier heads round other people not drinking!

Lots of interesting stuff on here the last couple of days. Whilst wanting to be a cutter downer, I find I can't have drink in the house on my AF days. If its there I feel I HAVE to drink it I live in hope that one day I'll be able to be a moderate drinker. At the moment I know I'm not. Yes, I have good days when I can have one drink or two but think thats down to not wanting it in the first place that day? IYKWIM????? Actually that makes me sound like I drink every day. I don't. But when I do drink, I drink a LOT....and THATS what I'd love to change.

Anyway, best get on

Miss P
xx

mollypolly

Good morning all:hello: and well done.

Have a nice time Bis...wherever you are.:D

Fedupandskint.....glad you had a nice time and managed to stay AF.Hope all turns out as you want it to.

See you later
Love Mollypollyxxxx

annberlin

Hi i am a newbie, have been reading your posts for a while and I think you are all doing well. My story if I may,have a great relationship with my OH except when I have been drinking.He had an affair 4 years ago when we were going through a bad patch and I can forget it most of the time but when I have a drink it all comes flooding back.i think All the things he said and did.last night was rhe final straw too much to drink and then it all comes out.I want this relationship to last but until I stop drinking it will not. I drink at least 2 bottles of wine a day and know this is not good for me.

Miss_Piggy_2

annberlin wrote: »

Hi i am a newbie, have been reading your posts for a while and I think you are all doing well. My story if I may,have a great relationship with my OH except when I have been drinking.He had an affair 4 years ago when we were going through a bad patch and I can forget it most of the time but when I have a drink it all comes flooding back.i think All the things he said and did.last night was rhe final straw too much to drink and then it all comes out.I want this relationship to last but until I stop drinking it will not. I drink at least 2 bottles of wine a day and know this is not good for me.

Hi and welcome Annberlin

You are in the right place. The support here is fantastic. I think we can all identify with your story a bit - when I've had a lot to drink I either become "Mrs Happy" or "Mrs Picky". OH generally looks for the signs as to which I am and then slinks off to hide. I pick on him for no reason when I've had a drink.
Why not join our Alcohol free June challenge. You could aim for a few alcohol free days to get you started?

Miss P
xx

mollypolly

annberlin wrote: »

Hi i am a newbie, have been reading your posts for a while and I think you are all doing well. My story if I may,have a great relationship with my OH except when I have been drinking.He had an affair 4 years ago when we were going through a bad patch and I can forget it most of the time but when I have a drink it all comes flooding back.i think All the things he said and did.last night was rhe final straw too much to drink and then it all comes out.I want this relationship to last but until I stop drinking it will not. I drink at least 2 bottles of wine a day and know this is not good for me.

Hello and welcome annberlin.

Your story sounds exactly like mine;).....My relationship is great now and I really dont dwell on the past.
Are you going to try giving up completely or just cutting down?

Good luck whatever you decide.
Love Mollypollyxxxx

barshamhillbilly

mollypolly wrote: »

:T:T:T

Does this mean that tomorrow is day 2 :D:D

of course

barshamhillbilly

:hello: Hi Annberlin and welcome to the madhouse

fedupandskint

Welcome anneberlin, you're in the right place for help and support whatever you need is here!

Take it one day at a time and try and fit in a couple of AF days in a week if you like and take it from there.

Take care hun

fluffyb

Welcome anneberlin

You are in the right place now

graemecarter

Miss_Piggy wrote: »

Lots of interesting stuff on here the last couple of days. Whilst wanting to be a cutter downer, I find I can't have drink in the house on my AF days. If its there I feel I HAVE to drink it I live in hope that one day I'll be able to be a moderate drinker. At the moment I know I'm not. Yes, I have good days when I can have one drink or two but think thats down to not wanting it in the first place that day? IYKWIM????? Actually that makes me sound like I drink every day. I don't. But when I do drink, I drink a LOT....and THATS what I'd love to change.

xx

Powerful stuff, as usual, has been written. This is such a thought provoking forum.

While I wanted to be a cutter downer, I found (after hundreds of attempts) that I could not guarantee when I would stop drinking after I had one.
For example, I would regularly say to myself I will only have 4 bottles of beer tonight, or 2 pints of Guinness, or whatever.
However, with one drink inside me, my resolve weakened, and I would change my rules just to have 'one for the road' - thus, the limits I had set myself before I started drinking would be out of the window.

As much as I tried, I couldn't turn into a normal, moderate drinker.
I think it is extremely rare that someone can go from drinking in binges to drinking in moderation WHILST ENJOYING IT
If I ever was successful at moderation, it made me bl00dy miserable as I didn't want to control it.
For me, no drink was better than just 1 or 2 drinks.

This is alcoholism , pure and simple. A mental obsession with drink, and a physical craving for more when you have had one.
When I accepted I was an alcoholic (after more than a decade of trying to be a moderate drinker) , the obsessions and cravings pretty much went away, and so there has been booze in the house for years and I have no desire to drink it, I have no bells.

This sums it up for me and some of my friends:

"That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us"