The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread! Part 3

PRICE_IS_RIGHT_2

Well done Fay, what a superb feat! :j:j The blooming supermarket wine displays - I knew they'd be all shiny and special offers this weekend. Night all x

eselt

Hi all- well done fay, now you have an answer to the question, "can I really resist alcohol when I am craving for a drink?"- and the resounding answer is YES I CAN AND I HAVE. Do this a few more times and practice it and it becomes more familiar and not such a big deal. Well done you.

Jo (hugs) come back when you are ready- take care, you'll get through this.

Heath and GC- wise words, I'm always really impressed by how reflective and self aware long term abstainers are- it just shows the tremendous amount of work people have to do on themselves to get to that point, and it shows a clarity of thinking that I just didn't have when I was drinking. I'm hoping to get there myself one day. Talking of wise words, where are you Bis?

Budgie- hope you have a great weekend with DS, I remember when he came last time how excited you were, he is a very lucky boy to know he is loved so much by such a wonderful person.

Hugs and cheers to everyone else, have a great bank holiday (or weekend for people in scotland)- I'm taking DD fishing, we never catch anything but it gives me the excuse to sit on top of a cliff and have a good think and people don't worry about me!

PS. I've found my Wii fit yoga exercises to be a brilliant way of relaxing and meditating- and you can say you are exercising although most of it is sitting down!

40somethingmum

:T

fayjmck wrote: »

HIya

SO I ummed and awwed and had a mental fight with myself in the supermarket - not a pretty sight

Left incredibily grumpy without the wine, am so P**ed at myself that I can't just drink like a 'normal person' - if I have wine tongiht - I will have whats left tomorrow, feel carp etc etc etc

SO burst into tears in the car, family think I am a fruit loop - haven't told them what I am doing ie - cutting down/giving up - lol just said I was a bit tired and stressed (all true).

No Wine bought

When do I get to feel chuffed - all I feel at the moment is angry and sad and annoyed and just angry

At what I just don't know, I guess my ability to take or leave alcohol,

Ignore my ranty post sorry - hope you are all fine

I know its better not to drink but I am still grumpy.

Hugs to all - when does this get any easier?????

PS Budgie you are a star

Oh Fay,

I have just read your post and burst into tears,. I have been , there done it AND have got the bottle of wine in the fridge. I have struggled big time this week and am sorry to say that I have given in to the urge quite a few times this week . Have been feeling a bit down this week so think wine will help which of course it never does.

Hope you have a lovely time with OH this weekend. You are doing really well and you know I am so proud of you .

BB - I have lost track of my days - I will let you know later . Have a lovely day with your "baby" . I wish I could be more like you as you sound like you are such a wonderful mum.:A

Good luck everyone for the weekend . The sun is shining here lets hope it stays.

40sm

115K

Sorry to hear you were struggling Fay and 40SM.:sad:

At least we all have this support on here. I feel like the people on here are the only people I "know" that understand how I feel in regards to alcohol. I don't think going to AA would have worked for me as I'm quite wary of strangers but this forum has made me really focus on having AF days and I find it a great help.
I think you should all give yourselves a pat on the back.:iloveyou:

I woke up p***ed off as I had a dream I drank a bottle of wine. I woke up groggy as usual and thought why did I do that, now I have gone back to drinking and I have a hangover etc etc.:mad: Then I realised it was just a dream! Phew.

14th day AF for me today. I'm nearly hitting my target. Hurray.

I don't think I will ever have a normal relationship with alcohol honestly. I think the years of drinking to excess have taken their toll and I will always have to watch myself and monitor my drinking or as I'm doing now make a concerted effort to stop drinking for a time. It seems unfair that other people can have a few drinks and then stop. I wish I could be like that but then when I think back about the first time I drank I got very drunk and once I start I don't stop until I get "that feeling".

cardboard_chewer wrote: »

I had the same problem last week. All I could find were ice cube bags in the pound shop (fill them up with water, tie the top and freeze them - avoids dripping water :-) Ebay or Amazon might be your best bet.

Thanks. I will look there.:T

Bismarck

fayjmck wrote: »

When do I get to feel chuffed - all I feel at the moment is angry and sad and annoyed and just angry

At what I just don't know, I guess my ability to take or leave alcohol,

Ignore my ranty post sorry - hope you are all fine

I know its better not to drink but I am still grumpy.

Hugs to all - when does this get any easier?????

PS Budgie you are a star

it really does get a lot easier...like putting on a persona....it really starts to fit and become you as time goes on...

trust me - it does get a heck of a lot better and things do start to fit into place and all the good stuff happens that you deserve....

I know that if I'd carried on, my options now would be limited...

take care everyone...just remember to try to do what's really right for you....

oh, and "constant vigilance"

Wanna_Bee_Free

115K wrote: »

At least we all have this support on here. I feel like the people on here are the only people I "know" that understand how I feel in regards to alcohol.

Thanks 115k, you've echoed how I feel about this thread. When I first started posting on here I avoided specifics of my drinking as I was ashamed and embarrassed to admit unit numbers or anything like that even to myself. I was drinking over a bottle of wine to myself a day. Usually one and somewhere between a quarter and a half. Alcohol free days were almost unheard of. Usually I would drink even the evening of a moderate hangover. An alcohol free day probably indicated a bad hangover. I am now ok to admit that here but couldn't have done when I started. I was surprised to see that over 60 - 70 units a week is a 'severe' drinking problem according to my new bf Marco and drink aware and others as I wouldn't have described my drinking problem as severe. And lots of people I know are severe by that standard too. I wouldn't be as open with my closest people, outside here.

My OH knows and is cutting down himself with AFDs to support my efforts. I am grateful for his help. I had urges to drink at different times to him yesterday. Hope it keeps working out like that, rather than encouraging each other one to be bad.

Have a good day everyone.

Pippilongstocking

WBF and 115k - yeah that's how I feel too - no one else really knows or 'understands' my OH can take or leave alcohol like its chocolate (I can take or leave chocolate).

Its hard to explain to folks, that its not a 'normal' relationship with alcohol. The few times I have talked to close friends about it I liken it to the calling from the cupboards, for some folks its all the chocolate in the house, for some folks its crisps, biscuits or icecream.

Thats usually how I try and explain it, the thought of someone not 'hearing' alcohol if its in the house to me is very very odd.

But having watched close chums with chocolate or biscuits - (i know its not exactly the same) but one of my chums will eat all the biccies in the house until hey feel sick just cos they 'call' to them.

Thank you all so much (I can't name you all I will be here forever!) for listening and being there - must dash off now to supervise pancakes

I feel a bit more chuffed than cross today and woke up thinking 'oh no' but then thought its OK.

You are all superstars - lurking or otherwise.

My units - were - 70+ a week - scary eh?

Needstochange

Hello everyone :hello:

Just popped in to say hope all goes well with your son Budgie, I know how much you treasure your time with him so I know you will be very happy

I am doing ok with the cutting down although I havent got another AF day to report atm as I have been away with some friends for a few days so have had a few scoops but nothing to worry about;)

Big hugs to all of those suffering at the moment, thinking of you.

Ill probably be back after the weekend for a few more days of abstinence:D

Any news from Winebox? hope you are ok babe xx

jo1972

Not doing much good at staying away

Apologies for the mammoth post........

Just noticed the forum is out of action after mid day so thought I'd pop on and say morning to all.

Big hugs to Fay and well done that girl for staying strong. What you said and the way you said it was so familiar to me and I'm sure loads others on here. The pure frustration and anger you feel when you 'won't let yourself' do what you are trying to do, then the tears, mate I tell you I've been there frequently. Knowing that someone else goes through this is a comfort to me (not to great for you :rolleyes:), but it means my reaction to alcohol is normal, plus I know that this behaviour is irrational so alcohol must be trying to control me that's why I get in the car and burst into tears (I've done this too!). I wonder how many people in my local Tesco have got into their cars and burst into tears after not buying a bottle of wine, I bet there's a few. Keep up the great resolve, you know you're my hero :A

WBF, that was a lovely post, isn't it great to have somewhere to vent and tell all. I know there are hundreds possibily thousands of lurkers out there but most are lurking because they might feel they need help too. Being honest with others takes us out of denial and makes us wake up and be honest with ourselves, especially when you read back what you've written. Good for you and OH working together, good luck

Right, I've not read anything else for a few days apart from those 2 posts, I'll read back in a minute if I have time before the forum closes.

Just wanted to pop on a report another AFD please dear Budgie.

It was a touch and go AFD though I might add, a minor version of Fays experience. Driving home and stopped at Tesco, OH rang and said that he was going out straight from work which my immediate reaction was 'great I can get drunk and he won't even know!' then I wrestled with myself (not literally) whilst walking round the shop thinking 'should I/shouldn't I'. I don't buy it in the supermarket anyway as it's dearer and warm so the booze aisles have no affect on me luckily. Got in the car and sat there for a full 10 minutes trying to decide whether to go to the offy or not. I thought that if I drove straight off then I wouldn't have given myself a chance to think about it (the angel in my head must be trying desperately to shout louder than the devil!). The upshot was as I was driving towards the offy, OH was out all night, it was only 5.30pm and if I bought beer then I'd drink it and be drunk by 7pm, I tried to imagine what it's like being drunk at 7pm and missing the soaps on TV, feeling sick cos I've drunk too much and the hatred that comes on later. So I decided to drive straight home and if I really wanted to go out later and buy beer I could (at a more respectable time :rolleyes:), OH is not in so no one to answer to, DD1 wouldn't bat an eyelid if I said I needed to pop to the shop. So that's what I did. I didn't feel anxious at all because I knew I had the choice.

Then, things started to go downhill but not on the drink front.....

I've been feeling quite down and not that well for a few weeks now, had that viral broncitis thing, still got the cough, plus I keep having dizzy spells and kind of pressure head aches, then the last few days been feeling a bit nauseus and like I need to just lay down in the quiet. This has been coming on and off for a few weeks, but last night when I got in it was constant. I decided that I wasn't going to be suffering that till Tuesday when the docs is open so went to the walk-in centre at the hospital and it turns out I've got benign positional vertigo, which I think probably came on since the start of my chest thing. Doc has given me some tablets which I'm going to go get when I've finished typing this, I've googled the tablets (obviously :rolleyes:) and it says they cause drowsiness and extreme drowsiness for some (thank god it's half term!) and you must not drink alcohol as this will make the vertigo symptoms worse :eek: :eek: :eek:

But I need the tablets cos I feel like I've been spinning round and round then standing still, feel like I'm still moving when I'm not, which makes me feel sick, it's not nice.

So looks like a few enforced AFDs for me.

I'm going to have a read back now, if I don't get back before the forums go down, have a lovely sunny day

xx

Edited to add: sorry for spelling errors and double words, this dizzy thing is a nightmare and it's even worse when checking what you've typed!!

barshamhillbilly

fayjmck wrote: »

I can take or leave chocolate

I can't

:EasterBun