The ultimate incentive worked! Now onto phase two

Flower08

Morning everyone!!

Well the horrible weather has finally arrived hear aswell, great!!

Sorry to hear about the carpet disaster Birdie - i agree its a shame OHs horrible rugby face thing was close by!

Im intrigued aswell about whats been happening in Ireland Dinah!!

Good luck with the morrisons job aswell poddle!

Dinah93

poddle911 wrote: »

Ooh, that's Harsh Dinah making an appearance!! I saw that too though, I just about managed to resist temptation, but I did buy 2 CDs with my Dooyoo Amazon voucher - feels very strange, haven't bought anything like that for ages!

Amazon won't accept my card to pay for the 4 housebuilding books despite the details being right, harsh Dinah is being punished for her harshness!

Your pasta incident sounds caotic Birdie, but a little funny in the abstract sense too!

Tete_en_l'Air wrote: »

Hmmm, twitching and a mystery licence, I'm intrigued!

Licence was just a piece of software we only had one licence for but were using on two computers, and it stopped working till we bought another licence. Nothing interesting!

Twitching. NIMs mother. She's hit a new level where she subtlely makes me and NIM feel stupid, useless, and a dissapointment. Never before have I come away from a lunch feeling like I need to turn to drink. I think she dropped us off on a bridge hoping I would take the hint and jump off it. A selection of conversational highlights are below:

MiL: It's just not possible to be happy on less than £60k a year

MiL: Your brother will be earning at least £1.5m a year when he finishes uni, then how will that make you feel?
NIM: (mumbling) there's more to life than money

MiL: You need to earn at least £1million a year to be happy.

MiL: You say £30k like it's a good salary, but that's nothing at all really.

MiL: (to NIM) Just you watch out, I have a friend who is a teacher and his wife earns more than him and she never lets him forget it, it'll be the same with this one (gestures to me).

MiL: (to NIM) You're not suited to teaching, you need a proper job and stop messing around you're not a teenager. And I fully blame this one's (me) mother for dragging you down that path.

MiL: (to me) You know you look a lot better with your hair tied back
Me: Oh, thank you, NIM prefers it loose but it bothers me a bit sometimes
MiL: But you really do need to look at finding a proper dentist for some braces, it'll take a few years, but they'll be all sorted out by the time this one (NIM) comes home and you need to attract the next one.

MiL: We're getting your brother a new car you know
NIM: Yes, dad mentioned it.
MiL: He can't be seen to be driving around in that tatty old thing. I won't even mention your wreak
NIM: It's 11 years and I haven't had any real issues
Mil: Still. We'd be supporting you too but you did have to go and flit off to England. You can't expect any support if you leave the country.

MiL: Why didn't you rent a car instead?
NIM: It's too expensive as I'm under 25, in 3 or 4 years we'll probably do that
MiL: (snort of derision) You had better be back from your jaunt by then, forget just coming to rent a car!

MiL: We've decided to build out that plot of land in your brothers name soon for him (they're building and selling a house per brother to give them some seed money)
NIM: I thought you were doing my one first?
MiL: I can't do that, you're not in the country, there's no point.

MiL: Maggie Thatcher was the best thing to happen to your country
Me: I disagree, I think she focussed very much on the south and left the north to rot
MiL: (to NIM) I hope you're strong enough not to let this one tell you how to vote because that seems to be what shes doing. Oh did I tell you my friend Robert is standing to be an MEP? You'll have to fly back and vote for him after all he did for me pushing the planning through on my house.

MiL: Be careful with this one and don't go burdening yourself with any extra responsibilities.

MiL: (on phone to NIM) You're only 22, extremely young, I'd be very disapointed if you made any permanent decisions before 30.

MiL: If you can't afford to send your children to private school thats a failing on you, and you will hate yourself for it
Me: Actually both myself and my brother went to private school for 7 years each (cheeky dig there, her two only went two years each) and I wouldn't really want my children in that environment, it might be good acedemically but its sterile and you only mix with an extremely limited group of people.
MiL: Yes but that's the only group of people who matter.

And that's the abridged version. I'm actually still absolutely livid about all the things she said, its just plain hateful. Apparently she doesn't like me because I've pulled the wool over NIMs eyes and I'm !!!!y with her because she can see through me. She also told NIM his dad doesn't like me either, but he very much seems to. She shows a total lack of respect for NIMs judgement and choices in life, both me and his career. NIM called her up the day after to say what she said was out of line, but she turned on the waterworks and HE ended up apologising! I know it's his mummy and all but I left there feeling like the 4 years at uni, managing my money well and saving, and supporting NIM no matter what he does matter for nothing, as I'm still a money grabbing !!!!! desperately in need of braces about to trick him into getting me pregnant. Where does she get off refering to my mums job as a teacher as not proper when she lives off her ex husband and plays golf all day?

We told one of NIMs friends about how she acted and a large part of me really wishes I coud talk to him again, as he was appauled and said a lot of things I really agreed with, more shocked at the things she said than I was even. NIM seemed to agree at the time but afterwards she worked her whiles and got all upset and it's going to be a whole lot worse for me from now on as he put it poorly and made it that I was the only one with an issue with what she said, where in fact he was extremely upset too. I feel like he tried to stand up for himself, but was kind of eaten alive, and it really upsets me and hurts me that he can't just say to her 'mum, this is my choice, im not being forced into anything my amy or anyone else. I'm happy where I am doing what I am doing, and I probably am going to make some big decisions before I'm 30, again, something I want to do and not for you to tell me when or what is right for me'. Well a girl can dream can't she?!

tinkerbel

Hey guys!!
Everything seems so exciting and Dinah, please post all about Ireland soon!!!!! I hate cliffhangers lol.
I hope everyone else is ok, that food debarcle doesnt sound good Birdie - bless your OH!
I wish everyone would stop talking about holidays because I want to go but cant afford anything right now so its making me gloomy!! Cinny, are you going to Disneyland Paris this year and then Florida in a few years? AWESOME!!
I went to the california one last summer and it was amazing! (been to Florida a few times and I think it was a bit better but i love having kiddy fun!!! - Make sure you don't miss the parade!)
I came back to uni the other day for exams (to a barrage of housemate abuse ) but also to a free Rimmel nailvarnish! its in Coral which is supposed to be a good summer colour so I hope it will perk me up in my exams its actually a good varnish too!
I'll probably check in soon as I am just revising all day for tomorrows exam.

tinkerbel

oooh while I was posting Dinah you posted that massive thing! Just going to have a read lol

Oh wow. sound like a nightmare Dinah the thing is, it sounds like she will lose NIM eventually if she keeps pushing you away and saying such hurtful things, and she will live to regret it, I really feel for you though, its so horrible so just carry on being your self and try to ignore her, it sounds from that that she is very wealthy, what is her job? It does show though, that money doesnt make you a nice person.
I hope you're ok,
Tink

Flower08

:eek::eek::eek::eek: I cant believe she spoke to both you and NIM like that!!

I dont blame you for still being angry, i would be absolutly furious! Doesnt she realise that money doesnt make you happy, and really how many people live on £1 million a year???!!!

And what the hell was the braces comment all about?? I dont know how you managed to keep your cool!!

It makes me realise that i am lucky to have a good relationship with OHs parents.

Dinah93

My teeth are a big bug bear of mine as they're a bit too far forward, but I made the decision to accept myself as I am, NIM loves me that way, and so it's all good. However now I can't stop thinking about it and am seriously considering going to the orthadontist if its that noticable.

Her friends live on that kind of money unfortunately. I'm yet to hear of one who isn't divorced or cheating on his wife, but hey, they all drive flash cars and play golf, what better measure of a rounded life is there?! She actually asked for the 'secret' to my parents being happily married for 25 years, after meeting and marrying within a year when they were 21. I said there is no secret, they make time for one another and value one another thats all. She snorted.

Flower08

Dinah93 wrote: »

My teeth are a big bug bear of mine as they're a bit too far forward, but I made the decision to accept myself as I am, NIM loves me that way, and so it's all good. However now I can't stop thinking about it and am seriously considering going to the orthadontist if its that noticable.

Dont let her comments influence you into that kind of decision. I know i have never met you but i have seen your holiday pics etc and i honestly see no problem!!
God i would hate to think what her thoughts on mine are!! I have braces at the mo, and although they are better now they were truely awful before
And your right NIM loves you the way you are, why she thinks it is her place to comment on things such as that is beyond me

Flower08

Dinah93 wrote: »

Her friends live on that kind of money unfortunately. I'm yet to hear of one who isn't divorced or cheating on his wife, but hey, they all drive flash cars and play golf, what better measure of a rounded life is there?!

Sounds like such a happy life :rolleyes:

wendz86

OMG she sounds like such a piece of work. I can't believe she would say stuff like that to both of you. It is a wonder he managed to turn out so well!

I thought I had problems with boyfriends Mum, bit worried she doesn't like me that much but she would never speak to me like that.

Dinah93

When NIM said it was rude she said 'you told me I could say anything in front of Dinah I would say to just you'. Christ woman, you just don't talk to other human beings like that, your son is a mature adult with his own thoughts, hopes and dreams, not something you stood in!