When to start dating again?

barnaby-bear

Taye wrote: »

Hey guys, yes i was at Daves .... getting ready for work right now but i promise to give you a full update as soon as i get to my PC at work.

It was nice kinda heavy and complicated, a few unexpected things some im not sure of, but overall it wasn't a compleate disaster dispite my kids trying to be "helpful", shall we say dispite telling them dave was a friend they decided they had an opinion on the matter regardless.

Well even if it doesn't pan out with Dave - isn't it nice that your kids have had the idea of you being an independent person capable of making friends planted.

Mutter_2

Can't believe I've got this far and Taye hasn't posted from work yet.

It's like someone has torn the last pages out of a thriller.

Taye

Phew ok

Got to "daves" last night with the kids and he took the kids into his "play room" typical bachelor pad haha.. Seriously couldn't get more clich!, big room massive TV, massive couch LOTS AND LOTS of video games, i think this guy has a serious addiction had every console, and an entire book case full of games.

The house it’s self was gorgeous and huge, i was worried about the car.. geeze its the house i should be worried about.. yes car is his, as are the other 2!!! Serious who needs 3 flipping cars??!! He is defiantly a man who likes his boy’s toys.

He’s also a man who’s obviously doesn’t have many kids in his house, everything was white or cream... geeze they won’t say that way for long with my kids around even i was scared to sit down incase I dirtied something up.

Erm kinda didn’t see him much for a bit while he was sorting out dinner after a bit i headed off to the kitchen leaving the kids to play on the playstation. I think his kitchen is bigger than my whole ground floor, and sadly the OS’er in me had a major drool over his larder!!! He has a real one *SOB* and he’s defiling it by leaving it EMPTY!!!! He said he didn’t even realise what it was, just thought it was a freaky little room that did nothing, thought maybe the boiler used to live in there or something.

He’d cooked enough food to feed a small army of elephant’s he said that he didn’t know what we liked so he just did abit of everything haha.. food was lovely, i don’t think he’s got an OS bone in his body though haha everything was bunged in the oven re-heat M&S food, which is lovely but if he eat’s that stuff all the time (which i suspect he does judging by the contents of his fridge) he needs some serious lessons in budgeting haha.

We sat down to dinner had some casual chit chat, he was nice tried to include the kids you could tell he didn’t talk to kids much but he was trying so that was nice. Then of course DS1 dropped me right in it... grrr... he asked quite openly with a big grin if “dave” was my boyfriend, i almost died... i sort of choked out a “no he’s just a friend” while going very pink.

Dave found the whole think highly amusing but didn’t help the situation one little bit .. grrr ... by saying that “he wanted to be mummy’s boyfriend but she wouldn’t let him, so could they help him talk her into it” ... grrr.. DS1 then decided that if mum was daves girlfriend it would be a good idea because then he could come and play with the playstation more often, while DS2 decided that he didn’t think mum should becomes daves girlfriend, he thought mum should just marry him instead because then we could live here and play the playstation all the time haha.

Dave found the whole thing highly amusing and didn’t really do anything to defend the situation, infact if anything he just encouraged them, by telling them they’d have to pick out bedrooms.... hmmmm talk about feeling ganged up on... im surprised you guys didn’t see the red glow from my cheeks on the horizon.

Survice to say my kids love dave, well they love his “play room” if that counts?? He spent half the night playing rock band with them which was pretty nice even if it does make me wonder how many kids where in the house last night.

Erm what else ... we did get some alone time for abit of a chat, we left the boy’s playing while we had a cuppa (also he doens’t drink at all... NEVER.. anyone else find that abit weird??! also he has a gym in his house?! So why does he come to the gym?! Bizarre !!)

Anyway we had a cuppa and chat, abit of a heavy conversation we talked a bit about my ex and what i was scared of etc (didn’t go into too much details) i won’t say we had a cuddle but there was a closeness while we chatted, he pulled my legs up onto his lap if that makes any sort of sense and we just sort of sat talking. He told me he was looking for a relationship not just a fling, i know that kinda sounds weird, but in the context and the conversation it sort of fitted and didn’t seem weird at the time, i think he was just trying to reassure me that he wasn’t just after a bit of fun.

We chatted about “my life” as it is and his and i think he was quite shocked, he didn’t say it but you could almost see the words “do people REALLY live like that” run though his head, the idea that I’m growing veg etc to save money seemed really alien, like he couldn’t comprehend the fact that i thought veg was expensive, he sort of joked that he didn’t think anyone but little old men on allotments grew their own.

I think it was abit of a culture shock for him, he’s obviously a rich kid.. mummy and daddy where rich, he went to private school, money has just never been an issue for him... not sure if that could cause problems later on but he told me he really liked me and that the “money” situation didn’t worry him, he wasn’t dating my bank balance.

I think that’s about everything, it was nice I guess albeit a bit weird. No kiss’s i’m afraid, sorry to disappoint.

Sorry for the epic!

tiff

You made progress, you didnt run away this time lol Sounds like a good "date" to me. Hopefully it will make things easier next time you meet.

jinky67

Taye wrote: »

Phew ok

Got to "daves" last night with the kids and he took the kids into his "play room" typical bachelor pad haha.. Seriously couldn't get more clich!, big room massive TV, massive couch LOTS AND LOTS of video games, i think this guy has a serious addiction had every console, and an entire book case full of games.

The house it’s self was gorgeous and huge, i was worried about the car.. geeze its the house i should be worried about.. yes car is his, as are the other 2!!! Serious who needs 3 flipping cars??!! He is defiantly a man who likes his boy’s toys.

He’s also a man who’s obviously doesn’t have many kids in his house, everything was white or cream... geeze they won’t say that way for long with my kids around even i was scared to sit down incase I dirtied something up.

Erm kinda didn’t see him much for a bit while he was sorting out dinner after a bit i headed off to the kitchen leaving the kids to play on the playstation. I think his kitchen is bigger than my whole ground floor, and sadly the OS’er in me had a major drool over his larder!!! He has a real one *SOB* and he’s defiling it by leaving it EMPTY!!!! He said he didn’t even realise what it was, just thought it was a freaky little room that did nothing, thought maybe the boiler used to live in there or something.

He’d cooked enough food to feed a small army of elephant’s he said that he didn’t know what we liked so he just did abit of everything haha.. food was lovely, i don’t think he’s got an OS bone in his body though haha everything was bunged in the oven re-heat M&S food, which is lovely but if he eat’s that stuff all the time (which i suspect he does judging by the contents of his fridge) he needs some serious lessons in budgeting haha.

We sat down to dinner had some casual chit chat, he was nice tried to include the kids you could tell he didn’t talk to kids much but he was trying so that was nice. Then of course DS1 dropped me right in it... grrr... he asked quite openly with a big grin if “dave” was my boyfriend, i almost died... i sort of choked out a “no he’s just a friend” while going very pink.

Dave found the whole think highly amusing but didn’t help the situation one little bit .. grrr ... by saying that “he wanted to be mummy’s boyfriend but she wouldn’t let him, so could they help him talk her into it” ... grrr.. DS1 then decided that if mum was daves girlfriend it would be a good idea because then he could come and play with the playstation more often, while DS2 decided that he didn’t think mum should becomes daves girlfriend, he thought mum should just marry him instead because then we could live here and play the playstation all the time haha.

Dave found the whole thing highly amusing and didn’t really do anything to defend the situation, infact if anything he just encouraged them, by telling them they’d have to pick out bedrooms.... hmmmm talk about feeling ganged up on... im surprised you guys didn’t see the red glow from my cheeks on the horizon.

Survice to say my kids love dave, well they love his “play room” if that counts?? He spent half the night playing rock band with them which was pretty nice even if it does make me wonder how many kids where in the house last night.

Erm what else ... we did get some alone time for abit of a chat, we left the boy’s playing while we had a cuppa (also he doens’t drink at all... NEVER.. anyone else find that abit weird??! also he has a gym in his house?! So why does he come to the gym?! Bizarre !!)

Anyway we had a cuppa and chat, abit of a heavy conversation we talked a bit about my ex and what i was scared of etc (didn’t go into too much details) i won’t say we had a cuddle but there was a closeness while we chatted, he pulled my legs up onto his lap if that makes any sort of sense and we just sort of sat talking. He told me he was looking for a relationship not just a fling, i know that kinda sounds weird, but in the context and the conversation it sort of fitted and didn’t seem weird at the time, i think he was just trying to reassure me that he wasn’t just after a bit of fun.

We chatted about “my life” as it is and his and i think he was quite shocked, he didn’t say it but you could almost see the words “do people REALLY live like that” run though his head, the idea that I’m growing veg etc to save money seemed really alien, like he couldn’t comprehend the fact that i thought veg was expensive, he sort of joked that he didn’t think anyone but little old men on allotments grew their own.

I think it was abit of a culture shock for him, he’s obviously a rich kid.. mummy and daddy where rich, he went to private school, money has just never been an issue for him... not sure if that could cause problems later on but he told me he really liked me and that the “money” situation didn’t worry him, he wasn’t dating my bank balance.

I think that’s about everything, it was nice I guess albeit a bit weird. No kiss’s i’m afraid, sorry to disappoint.

Sorry for the epic!

:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j

awwwwww hun that sounds like you had a fab night:T:T:T:T

And I think him and the kids ganging up on you was funny sorry:o:p

And what he said is true...he is not dating you for your bank balance, the same as you are not doing it for his:cool:

NOVASTAR

It sounds like the evening was a success then!!!
And don't go getting all inferior on us because of the material things you see that Dave has ..... you are such a lovely person inside and that in itself is priceless and he would be very lucky to have you!!! Just keep telling yourself that! x

BrokeBrunette

just got back from walking the dog, haven't even changed out of my 'doggy walking' clothes yet and here I am, hoping for an update.

Hurrah, I wasn't disappointed :j:j:j:j:j:j


well done Taye. Sounds like all is going well on the 'Dave' front. His house sounds lovely, but have to say he sounds even more lovely.

You said he has a gym at home, but goes to a public gym. Have you thought that maybe he is a bit lonely. Yes he has all the boys toys you can imagine, but that counts for nothing if you are lonely, or take it for granted. I think you both have different things you can bring to this relationship, so no more obstacles are to be put in the way!

Don't you dare let his financial status put you off. He's fully aware of yours and he sounds damn keen to me. As he said, he isn't wanting to date you for your bank balance.

You have to keep us totally up to date because all of us following the 'Dave' romance will be really sad if you don't

I can't wait for the next installment

Quackers

Glad it went well Taye.

I think what he did with the kid was a bit mean - for them if it doesn't work out - but thats just his lack of experience with kids. There would be plenty more bumps like that along the way if it continues - but he'd learn

He sounds nice & pretty genuine.

Just keep going with the flow & enjoy the time you have together.

Dont expect anything big and let what is meant to happen happen.

Have fun

And try get that snog.

its what WE are all waiting for :rotfl:

Quackers

And maybe you should tell him you nicknamed him Dave cos you didn't want a couple of friends to know his real name....

.....just in case you call him Dave in the near future

Money_maker

Sounds fantastic! Well done for going.

Kids always say what they think and by saying those things, its removed some awkwardness (even if you didn't think so at the time!) and by his reaction, he's lovely.

Would go to the gym for the social side - who wants to work out at home?

He knows you're broke, you have a tiny house, you ms all the time and he's met the kids. He's still interested.

Guys like that dont grow on trees you know.

Now you're more comfortable with him, the more emotional and physical side will develop in due course. I think he's so lucky - yes, him not you. This can work so dont put yourself down. You will find a way around any problems.

Good luck and when do you see him next?